It's actually true on all forth lol, I was supposed to die at birth, had the cordon belical around the neck, suffocating and medecine saved my life. To this day, medecine still keeps me alive with various pills to keep me somewhat functional, and low cost appartement, mental health support therapist, etc. As I grow older, I realize how fucking useless I am to society, and how God must deeply hate my gut for not killing myself already and ridding this earth of my disguting presence (oh and I'm sure other human beings feel the same too about me). I truly am at a point where I see absolutely no fucking point to stay alive, I can't even bring myself to read the bible and I'm too repulsive to have the courage to go to church (I'm sure I would be welcomed with horror looks).