I was reading the thread I just made and figured that I would make a second one because the idea for this one just popped into my head. Basically, I was thinking about how a lot of people who have treated me poorly in the past would ask me why I don't want to be around them.
One example I can think of was my former roommates in my earlier years of uni, who acted like rats to each other. While I was not as involved as the other three, this trio of roommates that I lived with (me being the 4th). I'm pretty sure I've written about them a few times in my very oldest posts but they have not been in the picture of my life for a few years now. Anyways, these guys were very duplicitous and two-faced with on another (and to an extent, me as well). While we were "friends" (or at least acquainted well enough to become voluntary roommates) for the most part during the first two years, at the beginning of my 3rd year of uni, things took a dark turn. The trio turned on on another and they were constantly being mean to each other. They took down each other's decorations in our living room, raged to each other about cleaning stuff, talked behind one another's back, got mad over others bringing people over, and even rifled through one another's belongings/rooms at a few points (the place I lived in at that time didn't have doors that locked from the outside except for the main front door).
As for me, I tried as hard as possible to keep to myself and stayed in my room a lot, to safeguard myself and my belongings. It was a weird time to say the least. And of course eventually they asked why I wasn't hanging out with them anymore and why I stayed in my room (it was in the basement) much of the day except to go to class. I didn't give them a straight answer either. Why would I want to be around such people voluntarily? It got so bad that I left the townhouse the day after that semester ended, and never looked back.
For another example, my parents will sometimes make comments asking why I don't want to be around them or hang out with them or talk to them. They think that a few small conversations a day does not suffice. And for some reason, they don't think about the reasons I might be busy. For one thing, I am relatively busy these days, as I am working around 25 hours a week at my current part-time job on top of my full-time university classes. That means that of course, I am going to have less free time due to my working schedule which is admittedly pretty irregular. My parents also don't take into account that when I do attempt to have some conversation with them, I often am only half-listened to, and they never seem to pay attention to what I say. Hell, half the time they're watching TV at the same time or scrolling on their phones.
In addition to that, when I do converse with them, I am often belittled in some way. They will attack my perceived lack of "common sense" as they put it, or make some comments that I am weird (I've been called a "weird bird" or an "odd bird" before jfl). Such insults are below me and don't particularly insult me but it doesn't incentivize me to talk to them. To be fair, these comments are also not completely wrong as I speak in an autistic manner and really only have conversational knowledge in a few more niche areas that nobody seems to care about like gaming or the natural sciences (aka the gay easy sciences that have little math involved).
In summation, it really should be easy to figure out why I don't want to have lengthy conversations with them because there is little we have in common and they generally aren't even interested in what I have to say. It baffles me why they ask these questions then, because I find the answer to be quite clear. Of course, I never give them this answer because they wouldn't care to hear it, in fact, it would make them very angry, I can guarantee it. They would find such an answer to be insulting somehow, when in reality I carry no deep personal issue with them over this topic. So when they ask these questions I just pretend not to really know what we are talking about and say that I talk to them enough or some other bullshit answer like that.
One example I can think of was my former roommates in my earlier years of uni, who acted like rats to each other. While I was not as involved as the other three, this trio of roommates that I lived with (me being the 4th). I'm pretty sure I've written about them a few times in my very oldest posts but they have not been in the picture of my life for a few years now. Anyways, these guys were very duplicitous and two-faced with on another (and to an extent, me as well). While we were "friends" (or at least acquainted well enough to become voluntary roommates) for the most part during the first two years, at the beginning of my 3rd year of uni, things took a dark turn. The trio turned on on another and they were constantly being mean to each other. They took down each other's decorations in our living room, raged to each other about cleaning stuff, talked behind one another's back, got mad over others bringing people over, and even rifled through one another's belongings/rooms at a few points (the place I lived in at that time didn't have doors that locked from the outside except for the main front door).
As for me, I tried as hard as possible to keep to myself and stayed in my room a lot, to safeguard myself and my belongings. It was a weird time to say the least. And of course eventually they asked why I wasn't hanging out with them anymore and why I stayed in my room (it was in the basement) much of the day except to go to class. I didn't give them a straight answer either. Why would I want to be around such people voluntarily? It got so bad that I left the townhouse the day after that semester ended, and never looked back.
For another example, my parents will sometimes make comments asking why I don't want to be around them or hang out with them or talk to them. They think that a few small conversations a day does not suffice. And for some reason, they don't think about the reasons I might be busy. For one thing, I am relatively busy these days, as I am working around 25 hours a week at my current part-time job on top of my full-time university classes. That means that of course, I am going to have less free time due to my working schedule which is admittedly pretty irregular. My parents also don't take into account that when I do attempt to have some conversation with them, I often am only half-listened to, and they never seem to pay attention to what I say. Hell, half the time they're watching TV at the same time or scrolling on their phones.
In addition to that, when I do converse with them, I am often belittled in some way. They will attack my perceived lack of "common sense" as they put it, or make some comments that I am weird (I've been called a "weird bird" or an "odd bird" before jfl). Such insults are below me and don't particularly insult me but it doesn't incentivize me to talk to them. To be fair, these comments are also not completely wrong as I speak in an autistic manner and really only have conversational knowledge in a few more niche areas that nobody seems to care about like gaming or the natural sciences (aka the gay easy sciences that have little math involved).
In summation, it really should be easy to figure out why I don't want to have lengthy conversations with them because there is little we have in common and they generally aren't even interested in what I have to say. It baffles me why they ask these questions then, because I find the answer to be quite clear. Of course, I never give them this answer because they wouldn't care to hear it, in fact, it would make them very angry, I can guarantee it. They would find such an answer to be insulting somehow, when in reality I carry no deep personal issue with them over this topic. So when they ask these questions I just pretend not to really know what we are talking about and say that I talk to them enough or some other bullshit answer like that.
