If I stopped using my PC I'd literally have nothing to do, I'd stare at a wall.

[Deleted member 7448]

For a while now I've had it with this lifestyle. I'm done, I rotted in front of a screen for 16 hours a day for more than a decade. There's nothing remotely interesting for me in this lifestyle anymore.

But I can't give it up. Idk if I slowly became like this over time, of if I was always like this so that's why I was isolating myself in my room all along. But over time I became truly agoraphobic.

I just really don't want to leave the house. I will when I have to, like when I'm forced to wageslave. But I just really don't want to go outside, it's making me so anxious. So I'm stuck inside, but all that there is inside is being in front of a screen. That's all there is to it. I feel like I'm stuck, in prison and my warden is my own brain. So I keep doing the same thing day after day, trying to fill the void by finding some game to interest me, but for years now not even games are fun, they get boring in 5 minutes.

 

[Ecstasy]

Today my internet was shut off for an hour. I have so many unread books but I did nothing.


Kinda offtopic but we talked about how social interaction always is cringe and draining for us? I have to call a company tomorrow and decline a job offer. I am obivouly in the alpha position here telling them I don't need them, but I already fear all the time they will get angry or try to convince me to work there (the company fucking sucks)

 

[Deleted member 24293]

Life as an incel is truly pointless and joyless anyways so you might as well do what you want to do.

 

[Deleted member 7448]

Today my internet was shut off for an hour. I have so many unread books but I did nothing.

Well I kinda lump book-reading with being on the PC, cause that's how I read. But I'm tired of that too, no more books for me. I literally can't read anymore, my brain nowadays seems to simplify everything to reduce it to the bare minimum, and so I just can't enjoy books anymore. It's like the spark is gone, like a veil has been lifted or something, and books just aren't interesting to me anymore. I'm not saying they're necessarily predictable, maybe that's not the right word, can't explain it.

 

[Deleted member 21768]

This is a true incel trait.

 

[Deleted member 7448]

Life as an incel is truly pointless and joyless anyways so you might as well do what you want to do.

That's the thing though, there's nothing I want to do. I've done this for so long because it's the only thing that was comfy in life, everything else sucked and was either gave me anxiety, so I always rushed to rot at home. But now I really hate doing this too. But everything else is still boring or anxiety-inducing.

 

[Ecstasy]

Well I kinda lump book-reading with being on the PC, cause that's how I read. But I'm tired of that too, no more books for me. I literally can't read anymore, my brain nowadays seems to simplify everything to reduce it to the bare minimum, and so I just can't enjoy books anymore. It's like the spark is gone, like a veil has been lifted or something, and books just aren't interesting to me anymore. I'm not saying they're necessarily predictable, maybe that's not the right word, can't explain it.

Try to start little by little. But the thing is you would also need something that is at least a bit interesting to keep going.

 

[Irredeemable]

Relatable, using the computer is all I do. It's effortless and costs no money (once you bought the computer, and I don't pay for other expenses). All hobbies cost money and require energy and time, two of which I lack. Using the computer is extremely convenient for any lonely male.

 

[Deleted member 7448]

This is a true incel trait.

Get a TV so you can stare at a TV after you're tired of the computer.

Well I consider my PC my TV, cause it functions as a TV, book, gaming device and internet browser. And more.

Relatable, using the computer is all I do. It's effortless and costs no money (once you bought the computer, and I don't pay for other expenses). All hobbies cost money and require energy and time, two of which I lack. Using the computer is extremely convenient for any lonely male.

If you had energy and time, what hobbies would you do?

 

[Deleted member 24293]

That's the thing though, there's nothing I want to do. I've done this for so long because it's the only thing that was comfy in life, everything else sucked and was either gave me anxiety, so I always rushed to rot at home. But now I really hate doing this too. But everything else is still boring or anxiety-inducing.

There's no joy or comfort in my life anymore I'm just rotting in front of a screen and have panic attacks every few hours. I think I'll get some jewpills against depression and anxiety soon. Maybe some Valium for my sleeping habits too. Then I'll try to OD or just cope being on drugs 24/7

 

[Deleted member 7448]

Try to start little by little. But the thing is you would also need something that is at least a bit interesting to keep going.

Idk I guess I might've burned out on reading books after I read so many web novels/light novels. Literally hundreds of thousands of pages of Chinese web novels. It must've fried my brain, I can't explain it, but it changed the way I see books.

 

[Ecstasy]

Idk I guess I might've burned out on reading books after I read so many web novels/light novels. Literally hundreds of thousands of pages of Chinese web novels. It must've fried my brain, I can't explain it, but it changed the way I see books.

I get you. In many cases I think its enough to read a blog article or watch a youtube video summoning a book. But with other books I had so much more information to dive into and I just wanted to absorb everything. Did you see that I edited my first reply?

 

[Deleted member 7448]

There's no joy or comfort in my life anymore I'm just rotting in front of a screen and have panic attacks every few hours. I think I'll get some jewpills against depression and anxiety soon. Maybe some Valium for my sleeping habits too. Then I'll try to OD or just cope being on drugs 24/7

I'd do that if I had money. And if I didn't live in this shithole country. Can't do that not only cause wages are so low here, but getting pills like that in general is very hard here. Everything that can give you pleasure is a big no,no. Except alcohol of course. But I was an alcoholic and destroyed my life in so many ways I still have PTSD. No more drinking for me, physically can't anymore.

Today my internet was shut off for an hour. I have so many unread books but I did nothing.


Kinda offtopic but we talked about how social interaction always is cringe and draining for us? I have to call a company tomorrow and decline a job offer. I am obivouly in the alpha position here telling them I don't need them, but I already fear all the time they will get angry or try to convince me to work there (the company fucking sucks)

Fuck them. Don't work there even if they offer you better pay or benefits. Working at a shit company can be hell, don't do it. What are they gonna do, they can't make you. Just be polite and tell them you can't, if they insist don't get frightened, they have no right to ask anything of you.

 

[Deleted member 24293]

I'd do that if I had money. And if I didn't live in this shithole country. Can't do that not only cause wages are so low here, but getting pills like that in general is very hard here. Everything that can give you pleasure is a big no,no. Except alcohol of course. But I was an alcoholic and destroyed my life in so many ways I still have PTSD. No more drinking for me, physically can't anymore.

Do you live in Laos? I don't know shit about that country, only that it's located somewhere in SEA territory. Well I'm also anti alcoholic. I used to drink a lot and my mother wanted to send me to rehab but I got off on my own. Alcohol is garbage, a bad cope imo. Sorry to hear that the situation in your country is so messed up.

 

[Deleted member 7448]

Do you live in Laos? I don't know shit about that country, only that it's located somewhere in SEA territory. Well I'm also anti alcoholic. I used to drink a lot and my mother wanted to send me to rehab but I got off on my own. Alcohol is garbage, a bad cope imo. Sorry to hear that the situation in your country is so messed up.

No I'm not from Laos, I'm from a different shithole.

 

[Deleted member 21768]

Get a TV so you can stare at a TV after you're tired of the computer.

You might as well stare at a wall. There's nothing on TV.

 

[Deleted member 24293]

No I'm not from Laos, I'm from a different shithole.

Which shit hole? I'm from western Germany