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I don’t have a depressive DISORDER. When my life is good, I’m happy and satisfied and all that good. So, fortunately I know it’s just SITUATIONAL, and not an issue with the neurotransmitters. This means that it is possible to cure my depression without Jew pills or therapy or anything of that sort.
But since I dropped out of my freshman year, and didn’t qualify for the army, and quit my job, and a few other things, I think I have depression again.
It wouldn’t be the first time. Not even in recent memory. I had a really bad Halloween in 2025, which led to being depressed for about a month. Then in late December, I had depression for a few months, maybe until early March.
I feel it coming back again. Many days, I get flashbacks to times I was depressed before.
I still have a fairly decent, but small social circle, that I’m grateful of. I’ve lost a few friends and gained a few recently, but that low level change is constant.
I stopped approaching women, and I have stopped caring so much about friends zone girls. I used to watch PUA content and redpill stuff but I do that drastically less now.
I want to improve, but I just find it hard to motivate to do anything.
I also find it hard to enjoy the little things as much, like an empty park, a sunset, or the birds chirping.
Honestly I have even started posting here less. I tend to get in my head about stuff now. I think people are more critical and judgmental than they actually are.
I have even quit a few hobbies I like.
Why am I posting this? Because I know I need to change. I can’t just LDAR and NEET, give up essentially. I still have a life, and I must try to live it to my fullest potential.
There were Two motivational quotes I heard that inspired me: “Life is pain, but you can choose to live with the pain of sacrifice or the pain of regret.” And also “The longer you stay on the wrong train, the more expensive it is to get back home.”
Both of those quotes hit close to home, and pushed me to get up and try.
What can I do? Just try to push myself out of my comfort zone a little bit.
I got a new console, and I’m going to try to learn new games and make friends from online gaming.
I decided to go to the gym again, after a long hiatus. I want to play a sport. Probably basketball or tennis, because I am decent (or even fairly good) at those, but I might learn a new sport. I am going to learn lock picking just because. I will try to make at least one irl friend in the near future. I will play more guitar too. I will write more short stories and poems
I talked to a female today, although she said she had a boyfriend within like 30s. But I will try to have a sustained conversation with an attractive female in the near future.
I will also apply to college for fall 2026, and also look for a job.
I’m sure other things I ought to do will come to me, but this is what’s at the top of my mind now.
While I know my life circumstances are tough, I can choose to drown in my own misery, or try to make the best of life, and live my life the best I can.
And to clarify, I’m not some stupid redpiller saying that going to the gym or taking a shower will fix your or my life completely, I am saying that erring on the side of action is almost always a good idea and rarely is worse than not doing so.
I was in the cub scouts as a kid, and their motto was “do your best” I hope to do that even in my adult life.
If I fail, remain a depressed loser, even if I try, than at least I can’t blame myself, which is at least something.
I wish you all the best of luck in life,
No Love Found
But since I dropped out of my freshman year, and didn’t qualify for the army, and quit my job, and a few other things, I think I have depression again.
It wouldn’t be the first time. Not even in recent memory. I had a really bad Halloween in 2025, which led to being depressed for about a month. Then in late December, I had depression for a few months, maybe until early March.
I feel it coming back again. Many days, I get flashbacks to times I was depressed before.
I still have a fairly decent, but small social circle, that I’m grateful of. I’ve lost a few friends and gained a few recently, but that low level change is constant.
I stopped approaching women, and I have stopped caring so much about friends zone girls. I used to watch PUA content and redpill stuff but I do that drastically less now.
I want to improve, but I just find it hard to motivate to do anything.
I also find it hard to enjoy the little things as much, like an empty park, a sunset, or the birds chirping.
Honestly I have even started posting here less. I tend to get in my head about stuff now. I think people are more critical and judgmental than they actually are.
I have even quit a few hobbies I like.
Why am I posting this? Because I know I need to change. I can’t just LDAR and NEET, give up essentially. I still have a life, and I must try to live it to my fullest potential.
There were Two motivational quotes I heard that inspired me: “Life is pain, but you can choose to live with the pain of sacrifice or the pain of regret.” And also “The longer you stay on the wrong train, the more expensive it is to get back home.”
Both of those quotes hit close to home, and pushed me to get up and try.
What can I do? Just try to push myself out of my comfort zone a little bit.
I got a new console, and I’m going to try to learn new games and make friends from online gaming.
I decided to go to the gym again, after a long hiatus. I want to play a sport. Probably basketball or tennis, because I am decent (or even fairly good) at those, but I might learn a new sport. I am going to learn lock picking just because. I will try to make at least one irl friend in the near future. I will play more guitar too. I will write more short stories and poems
I talked to a female today, although she said she had a boyfriend within like 30s. But I will try to have a sustained conversation with an attractive female in the near future.
I will also apply to college for fall 2026, and also look for a job.
I’m sure other things I ought to do will come to me, but this is what’s at the top of my mind now.
While I know my life circumstances are tough, I can choose to drown in my own misery, or try to make the best of life, and live my life the best I can.
And to clarify, I’m not some stupid redpiller saying that going to the gym or taking a shower will fix your or my life completely, I am saying that erring on the side of action is almost always a good idea and rarely is worse than not doing so.
I was in the cub scouts as a kid, and their motto was “do your best” I hope to do that even in my adult life.
If I fail, remain a depressed loser, even if I try, than at least I can’t blame myself, which is at least something.
I wish you all the best of luck in life,
No Love Found
