I watched recorded clips from my childhood n i was autistic asf

[Regressive]

So i was at muh relatives house n as a way to entertain me they brought in their old videos
In one of them i was like 13 n was being fucking autistic, acting crazy (going up to a little kid n moving my hands n saying some lyrics i had picked up from songs in an odd way/yelling), running around n saying random shit (mixing some other lyrics with some mental images i had n relating them together)
I acknowledged my autism by telling them lightheartedly
“why was i like this daaamn what the hell”

Also as i child i wuz talkative n shiet asf to the point everyone told me to just stfu ffs in a polite way or some of relatives just wouldnt let me stay in their house for more than a day
Here i am now
Rarely does a word come outta my mouth

 

[SuperKanga.Belgrade]

No one saw the tear Satan shed in darkness

 

[joocel52]

tbh for me its kinda the opossite i was quite as fuck as a child, wouldnt talk to other kids at all

 

[Kina Hikikomori]

I only talk to myself.

 

[Supreme Kanga]

I can relate to being extroverted as a kid to barely saying anything now

 

[Regressive]

tbh for me its kinda the opossite i was quite as fuck as a child, wouldnt talk to other kids at all

Ic
Too much silent n too much talking both must be autism
however i actually was kinda silent in school
So the setting/context must play a role too

 

[Regressive]

I only talk to myself.

Same. Satan sometimes pays a visit or accompanies me

 

[Regressive]

I can relate to being extroverted as a kid to barely saying anything now

The contrast/change surprises people too

 

[Supreme Kanga]

The contrast/change surprises people too

Everyone who knew me back then can't believe I'm the same person. I also look very different from my kid self which also adds to it

 

[Kina Hikikomori]

Same. Satan sometimes pays a visit or accompanies me

'Satan' is from Persia and has no correlation with my rational credibility, even among archaeology. At the very least, you can say “demon”, an etymological word from Greek that means something that teaches you or represents your negative emotions, but does not give you direct instructions, is not pejorative, people who have made unfounded analyzes through their mystical beliefs.

 

[Regressive]

Everyone who knew me back then can't believe I'm the same person. I also look very different from my kid self which also adds to it

Brutal how we completely changed(deteriorated if i may say)
The result of not being normie i guess

Hmm i have kept some semblances with my kidself lookswise

 

[joocel52]

Ic
Too much silent n too much talking both must be autism
however i actually was kinda silent in school
So the setting/context must play a role too

tbh yes, when i talked to adults i talked more.. either way the end product is the same depressed mess kek

 

[Regressive]

'Satan' is from Persia and has no correlation with my rational credibility, even among archaeology. At the very least, you can say “demon”, an etymological word from Greek that means something that teaches you or represents your negative emotions, but does not give you direct instructions, is not pejorative, people who have made unfounded analyzes through their mystical beliefs.

Demon is very generic n vague
Satan specifically is the one who revolted agains faggod which was a based move. Idc what the propagated story is (pride of satan leading him not to bow down to human). My satan been driven away by god n is tired of being forced to live as muh bad satan. He is in fact sympathetic towards the doomed weak people n hates god for burdening them with existence/inherent injustice
You see i have my own version/definition

 

[Regressive]

tbh yes, when i talked to adults i talked more.. either way the end product is the same depressed mess kek

Inescapable fate

 

[joocel52]

Demon is very generic n vague
Satan specifically is the one who revolted agains faggod which was a based move. Idc what the propagated story is (pride of satan leading him not to bow down to human). My satan been driven away by god n is tired of being forced to live as muh bad satan. He is in fact sympathetic towards the doomed weak people n hates god for burdening them with existence/inherent injustice
You see i have my own version/definition

Satan prob originates from zoroastrianism doe where he is angra maynu/ahriman... abrahamic rleigions made it cooler by making him and underdog like you said doe

 

[Kina Hikikomori]

Demon is very generic n vague

It is a concept that may seem vague, but it reflects the idea of a force that guides us, without directly interfering with our freedom. Perhaps imprecision is precisely part of its nature, allowing the individual to interpret this “guidance” according to their own inclinations and ethical decisions.

 

[Kina Hikikomori]

Satan prob originates from zoroastrianism doe where he is angra maynu/ahriman... abrahamic rleigions made it cooler by making him and underdog like you said doe

It was not the Abrahamic religions that "copied" him (let's say), it was their own influence on their literature, but this is not necessarily within the original centrality of their archaeology. This may have been captured within sects, which really captured the concept, like Christianity, this sect, so, yes, in that context, yes.

 

[Regressive]

Satan prob originates from zoroastrianism doe where he is angra maynu/ahriman... abrahamic rleigions made it cooler by making him and underdog like you said doe

Not that much of an expert in these matters
There is “Shaytaan” or “Sheytan” in Quran which i think is translated as Satan.
I cant relate to him if he is a chad lucifer (as portrayed in american movies)
I have to create my own version. Kinda my metaphysical view

 

[Regressive]

It is a concept that may seem vague, but it reflects the idea of a force that guides us, without directly interfering with our freedom. Perhaps imprecision is precisely part of its nature, allowing the individual to interpret this “guidance” according to their own inclinations and ethical decisions.

I know this concept or image made of him. But i dont have to subscribe to it. Its like normies taste in religion. “Satan is the bad guy. he is deceitful. Blah blah”
Meanwhile it was all gods fault but God took all good traits n satan is blamed for everything bad. This is not…healthy. If you keep blaming someone forever he will just get worse n more hateful.
My satan is just baffled at what god has created. He is baffled at his own existence. “Why tf am i to misguide people forever n keep being hated?”
He revolted at god for creating this whole universe not just humans
Its all my crude/rough creation/metaphysics tho
may later be elaborated

 

[Kina Hikikomori]

I know this concept or image made of him. But i dont have to subscribe to it. Its like normies taste in religion. “Satan is the bad guy. he is deceitful. Blah blah”
Meanwhile it was all gods fault but God took all good traits n satan is blamed for everything bad. This is not…healthy. If you keep blaming someone forever he will just get worse n more hateful.
My satan is just baffled at what god has created. He is baffled at his own existence. “Why tf am i to misguide people forever n keep being hated?”
He revolted at god for creating this whole universe not just humans
Its all my crude/rough creation/metaphysics tho
may later be elaborated

At first I did not talk about “Satan” in this text, but rather about the origin of the essence of the word “δαίμων” (demon).

I understand that you have your complexes left, but I don't care about that, use the assigned concepts as you wish.

And in the first text I said that I have no credibility in the word “satan” in a rational way and this whole story that you have as a premise, that this is not even the context of the whole story, because the fall of the “cherub” was a metaphor about Prince Tyre, who, like Adam, thought he was God.

And, honestly, I don't care about this esoteric mystique invented by Christians.

 

[Regressive]

At first I did not talk about “Satan” in this text, but rather about the origin of the essence of the word “δαίμων” (demon).

I understand that you have your complexes left, but I don't care about that, use the assigned concepts as you wish.

And in the first text I said that I have no credibility in the word “satan” in a rational way and this whole story that you have as a premise, that this is not even the context of the whole story, because the fall of the “cherub” was a metaphor about Prince Tyre, who, like Adam, thought he was God.

And, honestly, I don't care about this esoteric mystique invented by Christians.

Hmmm im not familiar prince tyre
Anyway it doesnt have to be a credible story. Its just a production of my own mind to soothe the pain or cope (in an autistic way tho)

 

[joocel52]

I know this concept or image made of him. But i dont have to subscribe to it. Its like normies taste in religion. “Satan is the bad guy. he is deceitful. Blah blah”
Meanwhile it was all gods fault but God took all good traits n satan is blamed for everything bad. This is not…healthy. If you keep blaming someone forever he will just get worse n more hateful.
My satan is just baffled at what god has created. He is baffled at his own existence. “Why tf am i to misguide people forever n keep being hated?”
He revolted at god for creating this whole universe not just humans
Its all my crude/rough creation/metaphysics tho
may later be elaborated

man you should look into gnosticism tbh

 

[Regressive]

man you should look into gnosticism tbh

Read a few pages on it
Im a materialist n dont wanna believe in things i cant sense kek

 

[joocel52]

Read a few pages on it
Im a materialist n dont wanna believe in things i cant sense kek

im a materialist too, incapable of beliving in religion, still i thought it would apeal to you lol

 

[Regressive]

im a materialist too, incapable of beliving in religion, still i thought it would apeal to you lol

Yes it indeed was close to my thoughts. There r just too many worldviews out there n itd be interesting to explore em to get a general idea of them. If only i had the willpower/motivation tho

 

[RechargedSamsung]

Lol i have videos recorded when i was 6-9 years okd back when i had a ipad so this must be in like 2012-2015 and i remember i would record myself either making up some bs about how the robots are gonna come and invade or i wouod pretend i was a youtuber and just basically do a commentary of what’s around me
Or i’ll just stare at the camera and just smile weirdly and scream at it

 

[Regressive]

Lol i have videos recorded when i was 6-9 years okd back when i had a ipad so this must be in like 2012-2015 and i remember i would record myself either making up some bs about how the robots are gonna come and invade or i wouod pretend i was a youtuber and just basically do a commentary of what’s around me
Or i’ll just stare at the camera and just smile weirdly and scream at it

Based fellow autist
We shouldve been diagnosed n treated early on before getting to this point

 

[Penguin]

I still am yo

 

[joocel52]

Yes it indeed was close to my thoughts. There r just too many worldviews out there n itd be interesting to explore em to get a general idea of them. If only i had the willpower/motivation tho

Tbh reading about philosophy history etc is one of the only things i have the motivation to do

 

[Regressive]

I still am yo

no rewiring of brains or undoing of genes

 

[Mecoja]

I was also autistic af. I would only walk in patterns and would have to count 5 times to 5 to do anything. I would grin and smile for no reason at all.

I still am yo

Same.

 

[Regressive]

Tbh reading about philosophy history etc is one of the only things i have the motivation to do

Im a reader myself. Mostly classic novels
But since past year ive lost the willpower to do it. Doing my MA thesis n once-a-week wagecuck + cooming+ living alone + being incel = no willpower left

 

[veryrare]

Demon is very generic n vague
Satan specifically is the one who revolted agains faggod which was a based move. Idc what the propagated story is (pride of satan leading him not to bow down to human). My satan been driven away by god n is tired of being forced to live as muh bad satan. He is in fact sympathetic towards the doomed weak people n hates god for burdening them with existence/inherent injustice
You see i have my own version/definition

واکنش سپاه:

 

[Regressive]

I was also autistic af. I would only walk in patterns and would have to count 5 times to 5 to do anything. I would grin and smile for no reason at all.

Same.

Oh the numbers
I had this giga autist trait too
I may post a thread on it tbh
its very odd n may be interesting

 

[Regressive]

واکنش سپاه:
View attachment 1310687

اقام ولی فگی. ععع چیز. فقیه

 

[veryrare]

اقام ولی فگی. ععع چیز. فقیه

 

[CRYSTAL METH]

Until 14, not only I was ultra autistic and low Inhib, but yet I still somehow had social validation and friends. I remember once I literally asked a girl i was sitting with if she wanted to have sex with me and she slapped my face LMAO. If my 14 year old self saw into what looser doomer i'd become 12 yrs later he'd probably never believe it.

Ever since I turned 15 onwards my life became miserable af.

 

[Regressive]

Until 14, not only I was ultra autistic and low Inhib, but yet I still somehow had social validation and friends. I remember once I literally asked a girl i was sitting with if she wanted to have sex with me and she slapped my face LMAO. If my 14 year old self saw into what looser doomer i'd become 12 yrs later he'd probably never believe it.

Ever since I turned 15 onwards my life became miserable af.

true. blackpill + pessimist character + traumas + eye of satan = ruined life

 

[CRYSTAL METH]

true. blackpill + pessimist character + traumas + eye of satan = ruined life

In a parallel universe where I never discovered the BP, I'd be a clown oofie doofie provider at best. Like this fucking arrogant FAGGOT of a landlord I had for a place I used to rent for work.

He has 3 or 4 children IIRC and his wife is 10 yrs younger than him. He is working in Germany but comes back every couple months or so. I am 748484% sure she fucks other men while he is away.

Thinking about how this faggot treated me like some mentally retarded subhuman unworthy of living makes me upset. But jokes on him at the end that her wife is fucking other men behind his back (I just assume, but I'm sure she actually does it)

 

[Regressive]

In a parallel universe where I never discovered the BP, I'd be a clown oofie doofie provider at best. Like this fucking arrogant FAGGOT of a landlord I had for a place I used to rent for work.

He has 3 or 4 children IIRC and his wife is 10 yrs younger than him. He is working in Germany but comes back every couple months or so. I am 748484% sure she fucks other men while he is away.

Thinking about how this faggot treated me like some mentally retarded subhuman unworthy of living makes me upset. But jokes on him at the end that her wife is fucking other men behind his back (I just assume, but I'm sure she actually does it)

i hope she does it and he finds out and rope..average normie filth living in delusion and protected by soyciety from our bullets

 

[RechargedSamsung]

Based fellow autist
We shouldve been diagnosed n treated early on before getting to this point

I was diagnosed with autism at 3 and they gave me this liquid called respirodin? It tasted awful but what it did was to control my serotonin dopamine levels this is basically a treatment for schuzos too lmao it didnt do much at all because i was still pretty fucking autistic

Also whenever you got excited did u ever flap ur hands?? Like very fast? I remember when i’d get excited i’d do that alot not anymore tho
Also to think that noones autistic in my family tree but me fucking sucks and injust found out if a foid drinks aspertane like diet cokes or sugar free shit while they’re pregnant it also causes autism and my mom drank alot of diet coke while she was pregnant with me so that fucking explains why!

 

[Regressive]

I was diagnosed with autism at 3 and they gave me this liquid called respirodin? It tasted awful but what it did was to control my serotonin dopamine levels this is basically a treatment for schuzos too lmao it didnt do much at all because i was still pretty fucking autistic

Also whenever you got excited did u ever flap ur hands?? Like very fast? I remember when i’d get excited i’d do that alot not anymore tho
Also to think that noones autistic in my family tree but me fucking sucks and injust found out if a foid drinks aspertane like diet cokes or sugar free shit while they’re pregnant it also causes autism and my mom drank alot of diet coke while she was pregnant with me so that fucking explains why!

Brutal
Yeah autism doesnt seem curable
My parents prolly thought i was just being a child so they didnt take any action if any action couldve solved anything lmao

 

[RechargedSamsung]

Brutal
Yeah autism doesnt seem curable
My parents prolly thought i was just being a child so they didnt take any action if any action couldve solved anything lmao

The way they found out was that i couldnt speak at 3 years old and also i would throw fucking tantrums like crazy so i remember my parents taking me to a child psychologist and that’s were they diagnosed me with autism and apparently i wasn’t gonna be able to verbally communicate with people and i would still have my tantrums in my 20s as a nearly full grown adult

Now here i am typing this out lmaoo fucking dumb ass psychologist here i am now functioning as a low autistic incel i still have a hard understanding social cues and im socially awkward

Fuck being high functioning hate it arleast low functioning autistic nigggas get fucking king treatment

 

[Regressive]

The way they found out was that i couldnt speak at 3 years old and also i would throw fucking tantrums like crazy so i remember my parents taking me to a child psychologist and that’s were they diagnosed me with autism and apparently i wasn’t gonna be able to verbally communicate with people and i would still have my tantrums in my 20s as a nearly full grown adult

Now here i am typing this out lmaoo fucking dumb ass psychologist here i am now functioning as a low autistic incel i still have a hard understanding social cues and im socially awkward

Fuck being high functioning hate it arleast low functioning autistic nigggas get fucking king treatment

Brutal how its all about luck..who gets autism who gets 10/10 face and NT

most docs just know theories and stuff and prescribe the same shit for everyone....its like they r dealing with cattle and when a disease is a bit advanced, theyll mostly be just ineffective

at least we r self aware and can monitor ourselves, i say...we know we r awkward

 

[Regressive]

The way they found out was that i couldnt speak at 3 years old and also i would throw fucking tantrums like crazy so i remember my parents taking me to a child psychologist and that’s were they diagnosed me with autism and apparently i wasn’t gonna be able to verbally communicate with people and i would still have my tantrums in my 20s as a nearly full grown adult

Now here i am typing this out lmaoo fucking dumb ass psychologist here i am now functioning as a low autistic incel i still have a hard understanding social cues and im socially awkward

Fuck being high functioning hate it arleast low functioning autistic nigggas get fucking king treatment

do you think your inceldom is caused mainly by your looks or mental issues?

 

[RechargedSamsung]

do you think your inceldom is caused mainly by your looks or mental issues?

Bit of both i have been diagnosed with depression suicidal ideation social anxiety possibly bpd??? I took prozac (which im fucking sure fucked with my hormones fucking with the development of my penis and balls) Idk i havent been diagnosed and with that but i’ll get big huge mood swings

My looks are fucking terrible i’m fatcel yes i could just gymaxx but im too ugly even if i loose the fat
Doesnt help im fucking balding +having a overhyper femme face i just look weird its not even a pretty its a fucking weird mark zuckerberg type face i cant even grow a beard to save my inceldolm my beard is patchy that if i grow it long enough i look like i touch kids lmao

as a result of this primarys school was terrible sure im big framed and have a above avg height(6ft) but doesnt really matter much if im ugly most of these fucktards on here say that height is law but then i see htns with htb or staceys the oneitis i had with this girl his fucking boyfriend is a 5”7 htn and gymaxxed and that shit just fucking enraged me i never liked short people at all idc if mods permaban me but i cant stand seeing short htns with foids




Perfect example of the shit i’ll see when im public minus the LL surgery part

Here’s another good example when i was in 7th grade i was at the same height since i was a early bloomer and THE FUCKING SHORT FUCKING MTN-HTNs got more pussy than me
i should add more detail i was in football from 7th-9th grade and since i would over hear most people talk about their gfs

 

[Regressive]

Bit of both i have been diagnosed with depression suicidal ideation social anxiety possibly bpd??? I took prozac (which im fucking sure fucked with my hormones fucking with the development of my penis and balls) Idk i havent been diagnosed and with that but i’ll get big huge mood swings

My looks are fucking terrible i’m fatcel yes i could just gymaxx but im too ugly even if i loose the fat
Doesnt help im fucking balding +having a overhyper femme face i just look weird its not even a pretty its a fucking weird mark zuckerberg type face i cant even grow a beard to save my inceldolm my beard is patchy that if i grow it long enough i look like i touch kids lmao

as a result of this primarys school was terrible sure im big framed and have a above avg height(6ft) but doesnt really matter much if im ugly most of these fucktards on here say that height is law but then i see htns with htb or staceys the oneitis i had with this girl his fucking boyfriend is a 5”7 htn and gymaxxed and that shit just fucking enraged me i never liked short people at all idc if mods permaban me but i cant stand seeing short htns with foids


View attachment 1310835

Perfect example of the shit i’ll see when im public minus the LL surgery part

Here’s another good example when i was in 7th grade i was at the same height since i was a early bloomer and THE FUCKING SHORT FUCKING MTN-HTNs got more pussy than me

dang i feel you bro. i too had this bitch oneitis in university,,,,she gave her instagram id to a 2 meter chad (good looking too) in front of me or would be acting like a racetraitor....we shouldnt focus on/be obsessed with any foid at all (water). im too jealous

i agree. face is more important than height but height must be there too to some extent. cant imagine a 10/10 who is like 160 cm..he wouldnt be 10/10 in this case in the first place
im average i guess...178 cm

 

[RechargedSamsung]

dang i feel you bro. i too had this bitch oneitis in university,,,,she gave her instagram id to a 2 meter chad (good looking too) in front of me or would be acting like a racetraitor....we shouldnt focus on/be obsessed with any foid at all (water). im too jealous

i agree. face is more important than height but height must be there too to some extent. cant imagine a 10/10 who is like 160 cm..he wouldnt be 10/10 in this case in the first place
im average i guess...178 cm

I agree you cant be too too short maybe 5”8 (176cm) is the absolute minimum that’s if youre a chad also my roomate in college has a gf but he isnt really a chad just a mtn i know he has a gf because every fucking night they’re on call but im pretty sure he’s getting cucked theyre both in a distance relationship since he’s originally from mexico nor have i seen the GF so i cant really tell if she’s ugly or not

 

[Regressive]

I agree you cant be too too short maybe 5”8 (176cm) is the absolute minimum that’s if youre a chad also my roomate in college has a gf but he isnt really a chad just a mtn i know he has a gf because every fucking night they’re on call but im pretty sure he’s getting cucked theyre both in a distance relationship since he’s originally from mexico nor have i seen the GF so i cant really tell if she’s ugly or not

yeah its absolute not about having a gf....even if you get a gf she wont be virgin most likely and will cuck n leave you even more likely
we should solve this fundamental problem first and well theres no solution to it..thats just the nature of things
i for one believe we can get a gf even if we r not chads/normies...we must try other things on different foids (thugmaxxing for example) i know the chances are low but its possible...but this is not the fucking problem. the sore problem is cuckery and whoery of foids when you do manage to get one

 

[RechargedSamsung]

yeah its absolute not about having a gf....even if you get a gf she wont be virgin most likely and will cuck n leave you even more likely
we should solve this fundamental problem first and well theres no solution to it..thats just the nature of things
i for one believe we can get a gf even if we r not chads/normies...we must try other things on different foids (thugmaxxing for example) i know the chances are low but its possible...but this is not the fucking problem. the sore problem is cuckery and whoery of foids when you do manage to get one

If she’s a whore i’ll treat her like a whore i’ll just cum and dump her snd leave as much as i wish i could have a gf youre right it goddamn sucks i wont be the first one because she probably has like 30+bodies the time she hits 18

I was niggermaxxing but it felt weird and cringe ngl and yeah the desire for wanting a gf is high but wanting sex since my libido is high the need for intercourse is very fucking huigh knowing foids hate small cocks i’m screwed down there as well so i get more angry because im very sexually frustrated and im tired of jerking off i want something more stimulating

Even if i somehow managed to moneymaxx the chances you’ll have to betabuxx a used foid is just cucked better to fuck young escorts at that point