NeverEvenBegan
KHHDV Wizard Alchemist. Wage Feelsdevilcel.
★★★★★
- Joined
- Nov 21, 2023
- Posts
- 15,759
Before returning to a horrible entry level call center job, I was a NEET for many months, almost a year. I had so much free time, that all the negative emotions had enough time to fully sink in and I became suicidal and feeling purposeless.
Then I returned to my old job and everything seemed better for a while.
This is what I mean by wageslavemaxxing. Basically get a shitty stressful job so that you are able to appreciate the free little time you have left. When you are a NEET, an entire day is NOTHING. But after working 5 days straight, having a free day feels like a blessing.
The idea is essentially harming yourself on purpose, then stop harming yourself so that you feel better because you stopped harming yourself...
But it backfired on me because I am depressed again and tired, too. I'm having issues sleeping, I started smoking, drinking more, I'm crying frequently.
I CAN'T WIN NO MATTER WHAT.
As a NEET, I felt worthless and suicidal, like a disappointment to my parents.
With an awful job, I feel like I'm making my parents proud and I feel like I have a purpose. But I am exhausted and stressed, feeling like garbage all the time. I have no time for anything. I haven't had time to play anything in days.
I CAN'T WIN NO MATTER WHAT. I CAN'T WIN. I CAN'T CATCH A BREAK. NO MATTER WHAT I DO.
IF ONLY I HAD A GIRLFRIEND THAT COULD HUG AND HOLD ME, IT WOULD MAKE EVERYTHING MUCH MORE BEARABLE.
Shit life + KHHV inceldom IS TOO MUCH TO HANDLE. NORMIES CAN HAVE SHIT LIVES TOO, BUT AT LEAST THEY CAN GET PUSSY OCASIONALLY.
I GET NOTHING. I HAVE NOTHING.
Then I returned to my old job and everything seemed better for a while.
With a shitty, stressful job that keeps my mind occupied. I don't have time to think. I'm always tired. No time to have the despair sink in.
I'm not even suicidal anymore And my parents are proud of me now that I have a job and I'm no longer a neet.
This is what I mean by wageslavemaxxing. Basically get a shitty stressful job so that you are able to appreciate the free little time you have left. When you are a NEET, an entire day is NOTHING. But after working 5 days straight, having a free day feels like a blessing.
The idea is essentially harming yourself on purpose, then stop harming yourself so that you feel better because you stopped harming yourself...
But it backfired on me because I am depressed again and tired, too. I'm having issues sleeping, I started smoking, drinking more, I'm crying frequently.
I CAN'T WIN NO MATTER WHAT.
As a NEET, I felt worthless and suicidal, like a disappointment to my parents.
With an awful job, I feel like I'm making my parents proud and I feel like I have a purpose. But I am exhausted and stressed, feeling like garbage all the time. I have no time for anything. I haven't had time to play anything in days.
I CAN'T WIN NO MATTER WHAT. I CAN'T WIN. I CAN'T CATCH A BREAK. NO MATTER WHAT I DO.
IF ONLY I HAD A GIRLFRIEND THAT COULD HUG AND HOLD ME, IT WOULD MAKE EVERYTHING MUCH MORE BEARABLE.
Shit life + KHHV inceldom IS TOO MUCH TO HANDLE. NORMIES CAN HAVE SHIT LIVES TOO, BUT AT LEAST THEY CAN GET PUSSY OCASIONALLY.
I GET NOTHING. I HAVE NOTHING.
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