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Discussion I need to stop punishing myself

Pancakecel

Pancakecel

Cope or rope, that is all.
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I’ve realized that I punish myself every single day.

No matter what I try to distract myself with, my mind constantly replays memories of how people have reacted negatively to me over the years — the stares, the looks, the exclusion — all because of how I look.

As soon as I wake up, it’s like my brain says:
“Time to serve another day in mental prison. You must think about everything that’s wrong with you, and you’re not allowed to enjoy anything.”

Logically, I know I didn’t choose my genetics, my appearance, or even to exist in the first place. So beating myself up endlessly is pointless. But despite knowing that, I still do it. Constantly.

My entire life has been a reminder from other people that I’m seen as less than. So how are you supposed to accept yourself when that’s all you’ve ever experienced?

My mind is stuck in this loop of self-torture. The only time it ever stops is when I’m asleep.

I want to be able to truly accept that it is what it is and move on — to enjoy video games or whatever coping mechanisms I have without my brain immediately dragging me back into shame and regret.

But this never lets up. Every day feels like a relentless mental assault.

If anyone here has actually managed to stop punishing themselves mentally, I’d genuinely like to know how.
 
I just try avoid thinking about how fucking miserable i am, the more my mind is set on copes the better.
 
Try to forget them or not think about it. Im trying the same and to remember that these people most likely forgot who I am so I shouldn't bother rembering them. Though this is probably less effective if you meet these people often
 
I lead a very unhealthy lifestyle. I am not punishing myself, I do not punish my SOUL. I punish my body. My body is not me, it is not on my side. My body is trying its hardest to make me as ugly and undesirable as possible. The body deserves punishment.
 
“Time to serve another day in mental prison. You must think about everything that’s wrong with you, and you’re not allowed to enjoy anything.”
I understand how you feel… my experiences in Christian fundamentalism led me to a similar mindset. A belief system that could care less if you go your whole life a virgin but condemns you to hell for jerking off. Eventually this became incompatible with inceldom.

If anyone here has actually managed to stop punishing themselves mentally, I’d genuinely like to know how.
I wish I had advice, but I don't. The habit of mental punishment is too ingrained to break, even though it doesn't come from a religious angle these days. It's other things like schoolwork… I feel I am being unproductive right now as I type this, and am wasting time. I can't do this shit I'm so done.
 
Last edited:
I’ve realized that I punish myself every single day.

No matter what I try to distract myself with, my mind constantly replays memories of how people have reacted negatively to me over the years — the stares, the looks, the exclusion — all because of how I look.

As soon as I wake up, it’s like my brain says:
“Time to serve another day in mental prison. You must think about everything that’s wrong with you, and you’re not allowed to enjoy anything.”

Logically, I know I didn’t choose my genetics, my appearance, or even to exist in the first place. So beating myself up endlessly is pointless. But despite knowing that, I still do it. Constantly.

My entire life has been a reminder from other people that I’m seen as less than. So how are you supposed to accept yourself when that’s all you’ve ever experienced?

My mind is stuck in this loop of self-torture. The only time it ever stops is when I’m asleep.

I want to be able to truly accept that it is what it is and move on — to enjoy video games or whatever coping mechanisms I have without my brain immediately dragging me back into shame and regret.

But this never lets up. Every day feels like a relentless mental assault.

If anyone here has actually managed to stop punishing themselves mentally, I’d genuinely like to know how.
Unfortunately our society is so obsessed with foids and sex and whatever the fuck normies do, that its almost impossible to escape it.

Trying to play video games? They got a foid main character now

Trying to watch a show/movie? Ofc they got sex scenes everywhere

Trying to go on a walk? Having to see Chad with his foid of the week outside

I think its not possible to stop thinking about it, i mean its a basic human need that we are locked out of. Its like trying to not think about being thirsty.
 
Stop caring. None of it matters. Easier said than done, but it's sort of worked for me.
 
Can relate. Life is just one big mental massacre for us.
I feel for you and for your situation, brocel.
I don't have any advice, but you always can vent to someone that you trust here on the forum, maybe.
 
I’ve realized that I punish myself every single day.

No matter what I try to distract myself with, my mind constantly replays memories of how people have reacted negatively to me over the years — the stares, the looks, the exclusion — all because of how I look.

As soon as I wake up, it’s like my brain says:
“Time to serve another day in mental prison. You must think about everything that’s wrong with you, and you’re not allowed to enjoy anything.”

Logically, I know I didn’t choose my genetics, my appearance, or even to exist in the first place. So beating myself up endlessly is pointless. But despite knowing that, I still do it. Constantly.

My entire life has been a reminder from other people that I’m seen as less than. So how are you supposed to accept yourself when that’s all you’ve ever experienced?

My mind is stuck in this loop of self-torture. The only time it ever stops is when I’m asleep.

I want to be able to truly accept that it is what it is and move on — to enjoy video games or whatever coping mechanisms I have without my brain immediately dragging me back into shame and regret.

But this never lets up. Every day feels like a relentless mental assault.

If anyone here has actually managed to stop punishing themselves mentally, I’d genuinely like to know how.
I understand bro I do the same
 
I’ve realized that I punish myself every single day.

No matter what I try to distract myself with, my mind constantly replays memories of how people have reacted negatively to me over the years — the stares, the looks, the exclusion — all because of how I look.

As soon as I wake up, it’s like my brain says:
“Time to serve another day in mental prison. You must think about everything that’s wrong with you, and you’re not allowed to enjoy anything.”

Logically, I know I didn’t choose my genetics, my appearance, or even to exist in the first place. So beating myself up endlessly is pointless. But despite knowing that, I still do it. Constantly.

My entire life has been a reminder from other people that I’m seen as less than. So how are you supposed to accept yourself when that’s all you’ve ever experienced?

My mind is stuck in this loop of self-torture. The only time it ever stops is when I’m asleep.

I want to be able to truly accept that it is what it is and move on — to enjoy video games or whatever coping mechanisms I have without my brain immediately dragging me back into shame and regret.

But this never lets up. Every day feels like a relentless mental assault.

If anyone here has actually managed to stop punishing themselves mentally, I’d genuinely like to know how.
I legit once cried due to the sheer amount of tormenting thoughts I received from myself. During that day; i wanted to kill myself the most. My brain keeps tormenting itself. Its so exhausting, and it leaves me destitute. It also makes me worse.
 

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