I Just Masturbated To Someone's FaceBook Picture

[FrustratedWhiteMale]

I just masturbated to someone's Facebook picture.
That was my date for Saturday Night.
What she doesn't know won't hurt her (Or the boyfriend, if any)
I just enlarged her face and placed it on a doll.
I was very romantic. I kissed her, made love, held hands, etc.
Then came the sex. I mean masturbation.

Don't feel bad for me.
I didn't have to spend any money.
I didn't have to travel late at night on a bus.
I didn't have to sit through a movie that I didn't like.
I didn't have to go to a crowded restaurant and wait hours for my food to be served.
I didn't have to tip the waiter either.

Yep, don't I have it real great.

If you can think of any other advantages I have, over a real date, please let me know.

I can use all the comfort / commissary I can get.

 

[NoMoreSlaving]

I just masturbated to someone's Facebook picture.
That was my date for Saturday Night.
What she doesn't know won't hurt her (Or the boyfriend, if any)
I just enlarged her face and placed it on a doll.
I was very romantic. I kissed her, made love, held hands, etc.
Then came the sex. I mean masturbation.

Don't feel bad for me.
I didn't have to spend any money.
I didn't have to travel late at night on a bus.
I didn't have to sit through a movie that I didn't like.
I didn't have to go to a crowded restaurant and wait hours for my food to be served.
I didn't have to tip the waiter either.

Yep, don't I have it real great.

If you can think of any other advantages I have, over a real date, please let me know.

I can use all the comfort / commissary I can get.

Goddamn chad

 

[Total Imbecile]

The worst feeling is when you see a qt girl outside and wanna find her IG to fap to her but you dont know her name

It bothers me so much

 

[SchrodingersDick]

Ain’t you like 55?

 

[Gremlincel]

This is what incelibacy does to a man.

 

[Deleted member 12355]

This is what incelibacy does to a man.

 

[FrustratedWhiteMale]

Ain’t you like 55?

Yes,

Goddamn chad

Thanks. Now all I need is my Travolta Suit.

 

[Six]

The worst feeling is when you see a qt girl outside and wanna find her IG to fap to her but you dont know her name

It bothers me so much

I just take a picture from my window.

 

[Deleted member 1252]

Done it many times.

 

[Total Imbecile]

I just take a picture from my window.

I cant fap to a grainy smudge and I dont have any decent cameras that can take pictures from far away

 

[FrustratedWhiteMale]

I just take a picture from my window.

I did that in the 1970's.

 

[SchrodingersDick]

Yes,

Thanks. Now all I need is my Travolta Suit.

How have you not snapped yet?

 

[FrustratedWhiteMale]

Now I am going to eat my pizza I bought an hour earlier, to complete my Saturday Night "out"

How have you not snapped yet?

Sex dolls.

 

[Lord Byron]

Now I am going to eat my pizza I bought an hour earlier, to complete my Saturday Night "out"

Sex dolls.

It’s pretty impressive you have made it this far. Keep going.

Also, I doubt there is a man alive who hasn’t jacked it to to a Facebook picture at one time or another.

 

[God'sGreatestRegret]

I can't take it anymore.

 

[MaxZM98]

why would i feel bad for you?

 

[Brahcel]

It’s pretty impressive you have made it this far. Keep going.

Also, I doubt there is a man alive who hasn’t jacked it to to a Facebook picture at one time or another.

 

[Deleted member 1227]

you are on a whole different level of patheticness. St.Elliot bless your soul.

 

[Deleted member 10314]

It's Over.

 

[Insomniac]

I’ve masturbated to pics of my brothers girlfriend so you’re not as pathetic as me bro.

Feel free to mock me. I deserve it tbh.