Every female I see. All I can think of is what the blackpill has taught me. I see them, and immediately wonder how much of a slut this woman is. I think about how much better her life is just by virtue of having that hole. It enrages me when I see women complain, they never have any real problems. A SINGLE fucking day in my shoes would be enough for 99% of foids to rope. They literally can't comprehend the reality of having no prospect of intimacy. It's all they know.
But through all this. Despite this rage and hatred. Once the rage goes away. I find myself once again just wishing this wasn't my life. I hate it so much. I don't care about money. I don't care about power. All I have ever wanted was somebody. I don't care if I have to wageslave 14 hours a day for the rest of my life. It wouldn't matter if when I looked at my phone, there was that someone excited to talk to me just like I would be to talk to her. As long as I had that someone to see when I went home. But instead. I look at my phone and there is never a single notification. No messages. Nothing. Just because I had to be born me.
Recently I've been having a similar dream every night. In this dream I cuddle and kiss with the girl I've always imagined. It's the most magical feeling. It's never even about sex in the dreams. It's just getting to hold someone close. But then I wake up. And I just cry.
I had just taken a nap and woke up just now. Had the same dream. Feeling extra suifuel each time. Life is cruel and pointless. I'll never experience the simplest thing in life that everyone else completely disregards. It means nothing to them. Because they've always had it. I hate this. I wish we could all just be happy.
Rot with me.
But through all this. Despite this rage and hatred. Once the rage goes away. I find myself once again just wishing this wasn't my life. I hate it so much. I don't care about money. I don't care about power. All I have ever wanted was somebody. I don't care if I have to wageslave 14 hours a day for the rest of my life. It wouldn't matter if when I looked at my phone, there was that someone excited to talk to me just like I would be to talk to her. As long as I had that someone to see when I went home. But instead. I look at my phone and there is never a single notification. No messages. Nothing. Just because I had to be born me.
Recently I've been having a similar dream every night. In this dream I cuddle and kiss with the girl I've always imagined. It's the most magical feeling. It's never even about sex in the dreams. It's just getting to hold someone close. But then I wake up. And I just cry.
I had just taken a nap and woke up just now. Had the same dream. Feeling extra suifuel each time. Life is cruel and pointless. I'll never experience the simplest thing in life that everyone else completely disregards. It means nothing to them. Because they've always had it. I hate this. I wish we could all just be happy.
Rot with me.
