I imagine myself being mauled to death by a bear once I eventually leave society for good and go full Grizzly Adams, just call it a hunch.
I honestly don't think I can participate in society anymore beyond the age of 40 especially if I have nothing to show for it, then again, I'll be shocked if I'm still alive six years from now. I'm just getting to the point that I don't even want to participate in this giant shit show any longer, I don't personally benefit from it whatsoever.
I have no personal life, I have no friends, I have no wife, and I have no children, why participate in a society that can't even afford me a basic personal life as a man? That question gnaws and eats away at me every single fucking day.
In all honesty, I would rather be mauled to death by a bear, at least I'll die quickly going out like a man with some fucking dignity intact instead of dying slowly in society within complete damning isolation. At least I would leave this world with some fucking style instead of being a sad pathetic lonely old man who dies in a hospital ward alone. If my entire life is to be cursed as it has been since the day I was born then I will choose my own death as I see fit, I refuse to die slowly and miserable into old age alone. I will then exercise the only choice I have in this world that isn't controlled by others dying as I see fit.