M
I’m only in my early 20s and I’m pretty much at my limit. Every single thing that once interested me, brings nothing out of me now. No joy, anger, sadness, just…emptiness.
Virtually every piece of media (movies, music, television shows, youtube, etc) leads me back to the exact same line of thinking in regards to how I’ve missed out on things that everyone else was gifted, just for existing. Video games are too expensive for me to indulge in and even then I doubt I would even play them consistently enough to buy them. Porn just makes me extremely angry, knowing I should’ve experienced it for myself years ago.
I’m at the age where my peers (bullies) are starting their careers, having kids, and just all around moving forward in life. A lot of them are going to suffer, especially considering the economic state of the country right now and the foreseeable future. A lot of their relationships are garbage or soon to be (sub 7/8 theory), no matter how they try to polish them for their social medias (I assume, I don’t use them). Even knowing all this, I can’t escape the fact I was fucking cheated and had my entire youth taken from me.
What am I supposed to look forward to? What am I supposed to do? How do you all do this for so long without snapping? I’ve burnt out every cope there is and can’t help but thinking about sleeping every time I’m awake. Permanently of course…
Virtually every piece of media (movies, music, television shows, youtube, etc) leads me back to the exact same line of thinking in regards to how I’ve missed out on things that everyone else was gifted, just for existing. Video games are too expensive for me to indulge in and even then I doubt I would even play them consistently enough to buy them. Porn just makes me extremely angry, knowing I should’ve experienced it for myself years ago.
I’m at the age where my peers (bullies) are starting their careers, having kids, and just all around moving forward in life. A lot of them are going to suffer, especially considering the economic state of the country right now and the foreseeable future. A lot of their relationships are garbage or soon to be (sub 7/8 theory), no matter how they try to polish them for their social medias (I assume, I don’t use them). Even knowing all this, I can’t escape the fact I was fucking cheated and had my entire youth taken from me.
What am I supposed to look forward to? What am I supposed to do? How do you all do this for so long without snapping? I’ve burnt out every cope there is and can’t help but thinking about sleeping every time I’m awake. Permanently of course…
