Venting How do I get my narcissist friend to pay back my 20$?

[StSausageCel]

I made a previous post about this. He still hasn't paid me back. Last week he said " this week I'll pay you back". Then this week when we had an argument about the whole situation, he once again said "this week I'll pay you back". I'm seeing him for who he truly is now.

How does he expect me to trust him when he's going to restaurants, eating fancy food, taking his gf out, yet he won't pay me back what he's owed me for months?

The only reason I'm not pressing him harder is because I know it's a delicate topic with him, and he'll start flaring up, which is incredibly stressful to me because I really don't see any justification as to why he should be angry when I am the one supposed to be mad.

I'm starting to understand why people struggle to get out of toxic relationships. This cuck has manipulated and gaslighted me so much that I'm actually ashamed of asking him to pay me back.

I'd really appreciate any advice. This whole thing has been stressful for me. I really wish I hadn't borrowed him that money because now it's all i think about. I get anxiety at night because I hate the fact that someone is owing me money, and possibly will never pay back from all indications.

 

[epillepsy]

you should constantly pressure him through texts and messages.
ask him for some collateral until he pays you back, like ask him to give you one of his video game consoles for safekeeping.
$20 is not THAT small amount of money, and he's already proved to not be your friend.
you are being cucked by him in a sense if you never get that money back, so be rude to him and don't consider "friendship" in your actions, which he has shown himself not to be.
he will pay you back to get rid of you.

 

[AmIjustDreaming]

Go over there, slap him around.

 

[StSausageCel]

you should constantly pressure him through texts and messages.
ask him for some collateral until he pays you back, like ask him to give you one of his video game consoles for safekeeping.
$20 is not THAT small amount of money, and he's already proved to not be your friend.
you are being cucked by him in a sense if you never get that money back, so be rude to him and don't consider "friendship" in your actions, which he has shown himself not to be.
he will pay you back to get rid of you.

Damn I wish I saw this comment before I sent him a message saying he shouldn't bother paying me back. But in a way, telling him he shouldn't bother felt absolutely freeing. I will definitely not be his close friend anymore. As someone else told me, 20$ is a small price to pay for finding out who your true friends are.

 

[epillepsy]

Damn I wish I saw this comment before I sent him a message saying he shouldn't bother paying me back. But in a way, telling him he shouldn't bother felt absolutely freeing. I will definitely not be his close friend anymore. As someone else told me, 20$ is a small price to pay for finding out who your true friends are.

But he still has your $20.
The problem is that he won and you got scammed.
That "$20 is a small price" thing is only a justification after the fact.
Don't tell me you're going to pay $20 every time you need to test if someone is your friend or isn't.
Just don't let anyone borrow money again or at least charge interest.

 

[AmIjustDreaming]

or at least charge interest.

he doesn't even have the balls to go get his money, and you think he should start charging interest?

 

[radishman]

If you give money don't expect to be paid back. It's not a loan it's a gift. If you get it back it's a bonus.

If i don't give to anyone but if I did this is my rule... no more than 100. If they pay it back im open to another loan. If they don't it's a cheap lesson and they are out of my life.

Move on brocel. You'll never see a dime.

 

[epillepsy]

he doesn't even have the balls to go get his money, and you think he should start charging interest?

idk, it's not that hard to ask for interest when lending out money, right?
i mean interest if he's late.
the lendee shouldn't worry about it if he's planning to pay back on time anyway.
only if he's lying and planning to pay back later is it a problem.
another problem i see is that he might agree to the interest, never planning to pay back.
i'm not jewish so i've never done this; in fact, i don't let people borrow money anymore, unless it's like $1 to buy a water.

 

[StSausageCel]

But he still has your $20.
The problem is that he won and you got scammed.
That "$20 is a small price" thing is only a justification after the fact.
Don't tell me you're going to pay $20 every time you need to test if someone is your friend or isn't.
Just don't let anyone borrow money again or at least charge interest.

Well it is obviously a justification, but what else can I do? From all indications he has no intention of paying me back, since he keeps waffling over the exact date he wants to pay me back.

 

[AmIjustDreaming]

nother problem i see is that he might agree to the interest, never planning to pay back.

exactly. he's seen as a "lick". you can't let people get away with shit like that.

 

[epillepsy]

Well it is obviously a justification, but what else can I do? From all indications he has no intention of paying me back, since he keeps waffling over the exact date he wants to pay me back.

you can do what i said, but now that you said he doesn't have to pay you back it seems less of a good idea.
try to somehow get that value back from him one way or another.
get him to taxi you around or steal a small object from him.

i lent money before to someone in high school, never got paid back, and it still bothers me at night.
no need to get yourself in that situation in the future.

 

[autism kills]

I know this sounds bitchmade, but just let it go. Cut your losses. Don't lend money, don't borrow money. Give it freely as a gift or don't give at all.

Chasing down your money and dealing with asshole normies is not worth the stress. I've lost an embarrassing amount of money trying to help my family out.

 

[epillepsy]

exactly. he's seen as a "lick". you can't let people get away with shit like that.

that's why it's best not to lend out money.
i don't ask my friends for money out of due consideration unless it's a few bucks to buy snacks.
i usually have my own money in my wallet or a credit card.
most people have no need to borrow money anyway, and it's suspicious they're asking you.
it's probably a subtle way of bullying you.
if he asks for money, he's probably already proven himself to not be a friend.

 

[StSausageCel]

you can do what i said, but now that you said he doesn't have to pay you back it seems less of a good idea.
try to somehow get that value back from him one way or another.
get him to taxi you around or steal a small object from him.

i lent money before to someone in high school, never got paid back, and it still bothers me at night.
no need to get yourself in that situation in the future.

Well I deleted the message before he saw it. Instead, I told him in no uncertain terms, that im tired of him stressing me out, and if he doesn't want to pay me back he should just come out and say it (though that doesn't mean I'll let it go).

I know this sounds bitchmade, but just let it go. Cut your losses. Don't lend money, don't borrow money. Give it freely as a gift or don't give at all.

Chasing down your money and dealing with asshole normies is not worth the stress. I've lost an embarrassing amount of money trying to help my family out.

Nah I think I'll give it one last try. I know for a fact if I don't get that money back, I'll have some sleepless nights because of how fucked my anxiety is.

I know this sounds bitchmade, but just let it go. Cut your losses. Don't lend money, don't borrow money. Give it freely as a gift or don't give at all.

Chasing down your money and dealing with asshole normies is not worth the stress. I've lost an embarrassing amount of money trying to help my family out.

Nah I think I'll give it one last try. I know for a fact if I don't get that money back, I'll have some sleepless nights because of how fucked my anxiety is.

 

[Deleted member 29001]

Just beat the shit out of him until he agrees to give you your money back.

 

[StSausageCel]

Just beat the shit out of him until he agrees to give you your money back.

While I HAVE thought of this, it's really too risky.

 

[sadboyo123]

Kick him in the throat, if he is tall bring a ladder.

 

[The Zulfigar]

Just kill him and take even more money theory

 

[Ellviss]

Go over there, slap him around.

 

[Deleted member 29033]

Get your money back then stop having friends

 

[Emba]

Just get robbed bro

 

[InMyCellInHell]

Just keep nagging. Try to guilt trip him like "I thought we were friends and I can't even trust you with twenty bucks?" or "How sad are you to steal $20 from a friend and keep him waiting for weeks?" "How could you steal from me like this?"

 

[CrackingYs]

I have bad news, and I have bad news.

The bad news is he is probably not your friend. The bad news is you're probably not getting the money back.

 

[Deleted member 27495]

your gonna have to beat his ass half dead or else accept you lost it, thats literally how it works dude.

Just beat the shit out of him until he agrees to give you your money back.

 

[StSausageCel]

Just keep nagging. Try to guilt trip him like "I thought we were friends and I can't even trust you with twenty bucks?" or "How sad are you to steal $20 from a friend and keep him waiting for weeks?" "How could you steal from me like this?"

He's a typical narcissist, if I try to guilt trip him he'll be like "Come on man, have some trust. Of all people to scam, how could I scam my friend?"

He's an expert at constantly reframing the situation so it makes me look like I'm the one who's wrong for asking for the money back. I'm honestly so tired of the situation. He's so far up his own ass, he doesn't realize he's making t extremely hard to trust him since he's constantly lying about when he's going to pay me.

I have bad news, and I have bad news.

The bad news is he is probably not your friend. The bad news is you're probably not getting the money back.

Well I always had bad feelings about him. When this whole "borrowed money" thing started, I researched his behaviour, and found out it's typical narcissist behaviour. It was a relief to finally be able to put a word on what is wrong with him.

Tbh at this point he can fuck off, as long as he pays me back. I've got new friends in college anyways, so I don't have to rely on him like before.

 

[Dregster]

I made a previous post about this. He still hasn't paid me back. Last week he said " this week I'll pay you back". Then this week when we had an argument about the whole situation, he once again said "this week I'll pay you back". I'm seeing him for who he truly is now.

How does he expect me to trust him when he's going to restaurants, eating fancy food, taking his gf out, yet he won't pay me back what he's owed me for months?

The only reason I'm not pressing him harder is because I know it's a delicate topic with him, and he'll start flaring up, which is incredibly stressful to me because I really don't see any justification as to why he should be angry when I am the one supposed to be mad.

I'm starting to understand why people struggle to get out of toxic relationships. This cuck has manipulated and gaslighted me so much that I'm actually ashamed of asking him to pay me back.

I'd really appreciate any advice. This whole thing has been stressful for me. I really wish I hadn't borrowed him that money because now it's all i think about. I get anxiety at night because I hate the fact that someone is owing me money, and possibly will never pay back from all indications.

Well that's 20 dollars you're never going to see again tbh

 

[StSausageCel]

Well that's 20 dollars you're never going to see again tbh

Fuck seeing this makes me so mad because I am pretty certain he has no intention to pay. He keeps virtue signaling about how I'm his friend and he can't scam his friend, and some other platitudes. But his actions don't match his words.

If I never see that money again, I'll either steal money or some object from him.

 

[Dregster]

Fuck seeing this makes me so mad because I am pretty certain he has no intention to pay. He keeps virtue signaling about how I'm his friend and he can't scam his friend, and some other platitudes. But his actions don't match his words.

If I never see that money again, I'll either steal money or some object from him.

I've seen this first hand over a 10 dollar bill JFL imagine getting burned for a hundred dollar bill.

I have a cousin who got torched by an employee who borrowed $450.00

"if" I "lend" money, I dont even expect it back.

Im greedy asf at this point in my life.