Serious Have you guys tried online dating? If so, with what results?

[RageAgainstTDL]

I tried POF/Match/OKC/Tinder. Used my best pictures which include me travelling exotic places like a cliff in Europe or swimming with dolphins/sharks in the Caribbean. I highlighted my job title and income which is top 1%. I wrote a bio based off what advice I found online for how to write a good one.

I can't even get 1/30 girls to reply to me on POF/Match/OKC, and if they do reply it's once and no further. I had a <1% match rate on Tinder which went nowhere. I only got the few matches I did from boosts.

Zero dates.

Anyone else have any different experiences?

I have no idea how getting a date is supposed to be the hardest thing to do in life. It's supposed to be "normal" and "natural", isn't it?

 

[Konars]

No i never tried it. I prefer finding someone in real life but i failed multiple times so i stopped trying.

 

[imbored21]

0 matches

 

[The End]

I'm averaging about 1/80 responses to messages on okcupid. 90% of those are rejections, the rest are idle chit chat before she stops responding.

One time I used a picture of a stud though, and offers came flooding in.

Every-time I've gotten a match on Tinder, they either don't respond or it's a bot/scammer.

 

[RageAgainstTDL]

I'm averaging about 1/80 responses on okcupid. 90% of those are rejections, the rest are idle chit chat before she stops responding.

One time I used a picture of a stud though, and offers came flooding in.

What sort of pictures/bio/messages are you using? What are your basic demographics (height/race/face)?

It's fucking brutal isn't it? God it's exhausting.

 

[The End]

What sort of pictures/bio/messages are you using? What are your basic demographics (height/race/face)?

It's fucking brutal isn't it? God it's exhausting.

I'm 5'8", white, overweight (190 lbs), full head of hair, no obvious physical defects. I've been online dating for about 10 years, so from ages 26-36. I've messaged at least 7,000 different women (across pof, okcupid, tinder, match.com, and more). Scored approximately 6 dates altogether - and one I was stood up for. And I message every female: no matter race, match %, weight, age, etc etc.

I studied photography so I'm able to take pictures of myself about as good as can be taken. I've written all kinds of bios - complete lies, almost-complete truths, and a lot somewhere in the middle. But, no one reads my bio. On OKCupid, at least previously, you could see who looked at your profile. No one ever did.

Like with the bio I've tried every type of introductory-pm I can think of. I've tried to be funny, weird, interested, disinterested, obscene, polite, brief, long, etc etc. Everything from "Hi, how are you?" to multi-paragraph essays about the shit on her profile. None of it makes a difference. It's all based on how you look in that little box that accompanies your message.

One time I was messaged first. Some girl wanted to make fun of me.

 

[RageAgainstTDL]

I'm 5'8", white, overweight (190 lbs), full head of hair, no obvious physical defects. I've been online dating for about 10 years, so from ages 26-36. I've messaged at least 7,000 different women (across pof, okcupid, tinder, match.com, and more). Scored approximately 6 dates altogether - and one I was stood up for. And I message every female: no matter race, match %, weight, age, etc etc.

I studied photography so I'm able to take pictures of myself about as good as can be taken. I've written all kinds of bios - complete lies, almost-complete truths, and a lot somewhere in the middle. But, no one reads my bio. On OKCupid, at least previously, you could see who looked at your profile. No one ever did.

Like with the bio I've tried every type of introductory-pm I can think of. I've tried to be funny, weird, interested, disinterested, obscene, polite, brief, long, etc etc. Everything from "Hi, how are you?" to multi-paragraph essays about the shit on her profile. None of it makes a difference. It's all based on how you look in that little box that accompanies your message.

One time I was messaged first. Some girl wanted to make fun of me.

I know what that's like. I'm the same height, not overweight, my face is kind of messed up, nonwhite. Well I give you kudos for continuing to try. Have you ever tried losing weight? On paper from what you've said that's your biggest defect and in theory it's changeable.

I'm working on my facial problems with surgery but that's hard work with lots of risks and no guaranteed outcomes. Also doesn't fix being a short ethnic which by itself is damn near a death sentence.

 

[The End]

I know what that's like. I'm the same height, not overweight, my face is kind of messed up, nonwhite. Well I give you kudos for continuing to try. Have you ever tried losing weight? On paper from what you've said that's your biggest defect and in theory it's changeable.

I'm working on my facial problems with surgery but that's hard work with lots of risks and no guaranteed outcomes. Also doesn't fix being a short ethnic which by itself is damn near a death sentence.

Yeh, I've been losing weight steadily for years. My highest was 265 lbs. But, with no positive-reinforcement on weight-loss, it's easy to go back to another hedonistic pleasure - eating. :-(

Being as old as I am, and as ugly and poor as I am, I wonder if it's worth even continuing to try to improve. Ya know, black pill and all that. I'm trying to learn guitar and singing, but I'm such a lazy retard that it's going nowhere.

Anyway, good look to you with the plastic surgery, my friend.

 

[Weed]

Zero dates same tbh tbh

 

[RageAgainstTDL]

Yeh, I've been losing weight steadily for years. My highest was 265 lbs. But, with no positive-reinforcement on weight-loss, it's easy to go back to another hedonistic pleasure - eating. :-(

Being as old as I am, and as ugly and poor as I am, I wonder if it's worth even continuing to try to improve. Ya know, black pill and all that. I'm trying to learn guitar and singing, but I'm such a lazy retard that it's going nowhere.

Anyway, good look to you with the plastic surgery, my friend.

Yeah I know how you feel as well. I alternate between persistence and despair. I'm in my 30s. Don't know about you but yeah my youth is already long gone and I'm still the same short/ugly loser I was in grade 7. It makes it feel futile.

But I think we have to keep trying. I feel the need to keep trying. What else is there? We live, we die, we do our best in between. I always feel better if I fail at something but know I gave it my best shot. I think it's okay to feel like giving up at times, but I do think it's worth continuing to try.

There are certainly plenty of examples of guys who lost a lot of weight and then had new opportunities open up. Or guys who got a good jaw surgery and went up a few points. It can happen.

 

[TheRealChincel]

Never got anything from it, I was older when the apps came out but had nothing from POF or OKC so yeah. That plus 2,000+ rejections IRL basically told me to “Swipe Left on Online Dating, Oldcel”.

 

[masterwizard]

Blue pilled shit

I like discussing Tindermaxxing, but it implies there is at least a reasonable base to work with. For some guys, its simply so over to not be worth bothering with.

What is your height?

What are your looks on a scale of 1 to 10? (be brutally honest here)

Are you balding?

What is your bodyfat %

 

[rotting-alone]

Never tried it. Considering trying it. But I don't know if I'm ready to take a gigantic hit to my rope-resistance.

 

[Murdoch89]

Was on plenty of fish for six months and guess what I got nothing

 

[masterwizard]

I lost my virginity in my early 30's, so I had success (Tinder). But it was a brutal mathematics game..let me explain:

Average guy has a 0.5% match rate (thats average guy, if you are ugly its probably <0.1%). For Mr Average, every 200 swipes will result in 1 match. Now automatically some women will never reply, they aren't on Tinder to actually meet anyone. So if you do match, probably only a third will actually message you back. So that is 600 swipes for one woman to message you back ONCE. Most conversations fizzle out after a brief exchange, due to the woman having dozens of other conversations running, easily half. Now you are on 1200 swipes to find someone who will actually hold a conversation with you.

If you are still keeping up, now you have to extract a number. This will fail often as well, but for the sake of argument lets say that anyone still talking to you will eventually be willing to give you a mobile number. But its not over yet, because even if you get a mobile number, half of the woman again will never respond to your first message, probably because they have since matched with higher tier men and lost interest in you.

2400 swipes for the average guy to get a girls mobile number, and have her reply back in lieu of setting up a date. Again many women might reply back but will never want to set up a date, you can easily say half once again.

4800 swipes to get a woman reply back to your message and agree to meet up for a date. ONE date. 4800 swipes.

You can see the mathematics of this quickly become absolutely ridiculous when working with such low match rates. A match rate of 0.5% is simply never realistically going to lead you anywhere. Its not worth the effort for the reward. Now remember all of that IS FOR AN AVERAGE GUY. An average, white, average height guy. If you are below average looks, ethnic, short, etc, its so over for you, its hard to describe mathematically.

 

[StormlitAqua]

I will try before the end of the year. I'm preparing myself mentally for MANY rejections.

 

[The End]

I was rated 3/10 on one of those "rate my looks" sites. I think that is an accurate rating. I think at my best I could be a 5/10.

I wanted\want to become a performing musician, so I can take advantage of the ambiance and alcohol to score. I doubt it will happen, but I figure I'll be even more miserable if I give up completely, so I at least put forth the minimum effort.

Embarrassing to admit I have even the slightest sliver of hope, but that's human nature for ya'. All of us do the best we can, regardless if it will pay off. :-(

They say religion is the opiate of the masses, but I think it's hope.

 

[RageAgainstTDL]

I was rated 3/10 on one of those "rate my looks" sites. I think that is an accurate rating. I think at my best I could be a 5/10.

I wanted\want to become a performing musician, so I can take advantage of the ambiance and alcohol to score. I doubt it will happen, but I figure I'll be even more miserable if I give up completely, so I at least put forth the minimum effort.

Embarrassing to admit I have even the slightest sliver of hope, but that's human nature for ya'. All of us do the best we can, regardless if it will pay off. :-(

I don't think it's embarrassing. I think it's commendable. I think the real embarrassments are all the people who have time to spend 8 hours on a forum a day but zero time to try to do anything with their lives. No one can fault you for trying. You have only yourself to be accountable to. When you are 80 on your deathbed you may look back at a life of failure. But at least you won't look back wondering if maybe you should have made an effort, because you'll know you really did, and it was actually the best life you could have.

That's counts for something.

Most of the people who just propose to LDAR 24/7 are either lazy to begin with or afraid of failure. If you're someone who is ambitious, you will always want to try and keep trying. You won't be able to turn that off. And there's no reason to. It's just the way you are wired.

 

[The End]

I don't think it's embarrassing. I think it's commendable. I think the real embarrassments are all the people who have time to spend 8 hours on a forum a day but zero time to try to do anything with their lives. No one can fault you for trying. You have only yourself to be accountable to. When you are 80 on your deathbed you may look back at a life of failure. But at least you won't look back wondering if maybe you should have made an effort, because you'll know you really did, and it was actually the best life you could have.

That's counts for something.

Most of the people who just propose to LDAR 24/7 are either lazy to begin with or afraid of failure. If you're someone who is ambitious, you will always want to try and keep trying. You won't be able to turn that off. And there's no reason to. It's just the way you are wired.

I'm extremely ambitious, and it's always resulted in failure and pain. I'd be better off with no ambition - I wish I could be content with my low status; but I got too much ego. ;-)

Good luck to ye'. And if I ever do go from omega-to-alpha, believe me, I'll never forget and never forgive.

 

[masterwizard]

I'm 5'7.5"

Got any pictures you can PM me? Whats the deal with your jaw?

I'll be blunt, your height is killing you. Its an automatic swipe-left for probably 80% of women unless you are a slayer tier looks. I bet even a chad would struggle at that height.

Are you white? I've been assuming you are, again if you are ethnic thats a death sentence as well.


Abandon the western dating scene all together. I highly recommend you try visa maxxing in an Asian country. If you are white you are going to jump up 2 points INSTANTLY, and if you have the power of a decent passport, that will be even better. Go try thailand or the phillipines, whiteness is worshipped there. All of their politicians and celebrities tend to be white-mixed. All the women use whitening skin products to look lighter.

 

[masterwizard]

I'm not white either.

You have my genuine sympathy mate, being below average height and non white in the West is a death sentence. There is virtually nothing you can do to get around that.

Leg lengthening surgery will probably just cripple you physically for life, as well as ruin you financially.

My last bit of advice - if you are from the West, visa-max is still a reasonable option. Women in places like the phillipines will see your visa status as a big plus, regardless of who its attached to. If you are prepared to accept it will be a financial transaction - her body, for your money and Visa, then its still possible you can find someone.

Your first step should be doing Tinder Safari just to get a feel for whether or not you will get matches, set your location to somewhere like Manila and see how you get on.

What race are you? Black, curry? Asian?

 

[RageAgainstTDL]

I lost my virginity in my early 30's, so I had success (Tinder). But it was a brutal mathematics game..let me explain:

Average guy has a 0.5% match rate (thats average guy, if you are ugly its probably <0.1%). For Mr Average, every 200 swipes will result in 1 match. Now automatically some women will never reply, they aren't on Tinder to actually meet anyone. So if you do match, probably only a third will actually message you back. So that is 600 swipes for one woman to message you back ONCE. Most conversations fizzle out after a brief exchange, due to the woman having dozens of other conversations running, easily half. Now you are on 1200 swipes to find someone who will actually hold a conversation with you.

If you are still keeping up, now you have to extract a number. This will fail often as well, but for the sake of argument lets say that anyone still talking to you will eventually be willing to give you a mobile number. But its not over yet, because even if you get a mobile number, half of the woman again will never respond to your first message, probably because they have since matched with higher tier men and lost interest in you.

2400 swipes for the average guy to get a girls mobile number, and have her reply back in lieu of setting up a date. Again many women might reply back but will never want to set up a date, you can easily say half once again.

4800 swipes to get a woman reply back to your message and agree to meet up for a date. ONE date. 4800 swipes.

You can see the mathematics of this quickly become absolutely ridiculous when working with such low match rates. A match rate of 0.5% is simply never realistically going to lead you anywhere. Its not worth the effort for the reward. Now remember all of that IS FOR AN AVERAGE GUY. An average, white, average height guy. If you are below average looks, ethnic, short, etc, its so over for you, its hard to describe mathematically.

I had slightly less than 1% match rate with boosts. And as established I'm short, ugly, and nonwhite.

Where do you get your 0.5% rate from? As far as I know, I've never seen good stats on it. I think you're being overly pessimistic on the numbers.

 

[mylifeistrash]

If you're not chad, online dating is like challenging the guy in my avatar to 1v1 basketball.

I guess in theory if you played him 10,000 times over many lifetimes, you could possibly win.

 

[masterwizard]

I don't really see any point in getting some foreign girl who just wants citizenship. If I'm gonna pay thousands of dollars in airfare every time to see her, what's the point? Cheaper/easier to just spend that on sugar babies or hookers at home.

Don't want to say my race but basically I agree with you. I've never met a single short nonwhite guy who can do well with women.

Sugar babies cost thousands of dollars and you aren't even guaranteed sex, and there is zero chance of her ever having feelings for you. You could meet someone abroad, from a poor as fuck region, who just wants to get out to someone more prosperous so she can send a few pennies home to her family, which relatively speaking is a lot to them.

You can escortcel, thats fine. But that will only meet your physical needs, not the need for companionship. If you can live like that, then by all means escortcel. But you seem to be wanting more, so im telling you visa-maxing is probably your most realistic hope.

I was probably close to 0.5% when I first tried, and I am white, 5'10, average looking. Anyway whether its 0.5% or 2%, its irrelevant - those kinds of numbers are mathematically not sustainable for meeting someone.

 

[Deleted member 5712]

I just turned 30. Starting from maybe 23/24 I went hard trying to make the online dating thing work. Pictures. Profiles. Multiple sites. I knew I couldn't just go to a bar or pickup a female at a random place so my only option was to woo her with words before we even saw each other face to face. So I chatted. I texted (sorta). I sent pictures. I can't say NOTHING ever came of it but I only had 3 girls in all my years of trying to find a partner. By 3 girls I mean only 3 girls ever tried to give me attention.
1) 29yo woman with 2 boys from different fathers. Had herpes. YUCK! No thanks
2) Woman in her mid to late 40s. Was married. Had a husband who cheated so she told me it was okay for her to cheat so they could be even. DEFINITELY NOT!
3) Woman in her early 20s or mid 20s. Thought she was good looking. After talking some more turned out she was a hooker but didn't identify herself as a hooker. Said she was just "dating around" but call it what you want she was a hooker. SugarBaby. Friend with benefits. Whatever it is she fucked a lot of guys as her lifestyle. Totally not for me.
One thing I didn't like about the online scene is that a lot of women would send me just fucking random hurtful messages. Like I'd get a notification from a profile and think I hit a match and the email would say, "You are creepy. You look like a creepy." or "You look like a killer." or those types of comments. I got a lot of those. I also knew ahead of time I wouldn't get a lot of activity because in my profile I put that I had "No Experience" with women and sometimes I'd put "Virgin" or in other forums I'd put "Little Experience With Women." Lots of users would tell me to take that off but I didn't. I wasn't going to lie to people. I wanted the girls to know upfront that I was a virgin. Why is that such a shameful attribute on a man and why do women run away from virgins?

 

[hermitcel]

every couple of months i reinstall tinder to give it a shot. each time I get 10-15 likes within a week, maybe 3 or 4 will respond, and then I either run out of things to say or they stop responding and unmatch me. How the fuck do people talk with each other it's gay af

 

[RageAgainstTDL]

every couple of months i reinstall tinder to give it a shot. each time I get 10-15 likes within a week, maybe 3 or 4 will respond, and then I either run out of things to say or they stop responding and unmatch me. How the fuck do people talk with each other it's gay af

So what's your deal? Autism?

 

[masterwizard]

Why is that such a shameful attribute on a man and why do women run away from virgins?

Because women operate off of social cues to help them figure out whether a man is optimal or aberrant. Its why women chase after men that are already taken, but ignore single men like they are invisible. The logic is that if you were worth dating, a woman would already be dating you. If you are single, its for a reason.

Virginity is a marker saying that you are so aberrant you couldn't even get laid once in your entire life. You might as well have your profile picture with a machete and holding a severed head - the affect is about the same.

 

[Bangkok or bust]

It's hopeless. I'm a 4 to 5/10, keep fit at 170lbs /16% bodyfat, 5'10. Work low wage but have interesting hobbies.

My reply rate is less than 1% 1/100. and they flake quick. I've had the odd landwhale 10 years older than me msg, but I would rather not happen.

 

[Colly]

Nah women are in Tinder just for chads and ego boost. Every other form of online dating is for oldcels.

 

[uninstall]

If you're not chad, online dating is like challenging the guy in my avatar to 1v1 basketball.

I guess in theory if you played him 10,000 times over many lifetimes, you could possibly win.

 

[uninstall]

Nah women are in Tinder just for chads and ego boost. Every other form of online dating is for oldcels.

 

[uninstall]

Did online dating (mainly Tinder and 1-2 other apps) for 18 months.

I actually talked to many different women, but 99% of everything resulted in ghosting.

Worse of all, I GOT TREATED LIKE SHIT.

Just a few days ago, I deleted all my profiles and actually feel pretty happy about it.

I also hate texting.

I would say that unless you are truly a solid 7 or an 8 - it's basically impossible to get benefits.

If you are average, you have to get lucky to score. In general, average dudes don't do well online.

 

[uninstall]

every couple of months i reinstall tinder to give it a shot. each time I get 10-15 likes within a week, maybe 3 or 4 will respond, and then I either run out of things to say or they stop responding and unmatch me. How the fuck do people talk with each other it's gay af

u are supposed to ask for a number or a date quickly

if she refuses directly (no) or indirectly (maybe some other time), it's over.

 

[Lonelyvirgin]

I tried Tinder and OKCupid for couple months. 4 matches, 3 bots and one was real person. She ended up ghosting me after 2 days... Online dating made me even more depressed

 

[ropetomorrow]

trying online dating now.... conversations going nowhere...

 

[chadmarco]

I made a few fake profiles just to see what my options are. I'm good lol

 

[hermitcel]

So what's your deal? Autism?

not actually diagnosed for it but I'm definitely different from normies when it comes to communication and stuff. I'm a creepy weirdo I should probably rope

 

[Detro]

Been on tinder a week and have 0 matches (but that's expected, I'm like a 2-3/10).
But I'm also very picky, the average girl on there looks gross to me.
These are the thots who think they all deserve a 7/10?
It's over for civilization, when 4-5/10s are demanding 7+s and refusing to compromise.

 

[deathgreetsmeslow]

tl;dr fake cels all above ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Why would an incel try dating sites where the sole purpose is to judge a person based on looks?

 

[Deleted member 5712]

Why would an incel try dating sites where the sole purpose is to judge a person based on looks?

Because we still have/had hope and want to get off this alone train of misery.

 

[Raper]

why do women run away from virgins?

Females assume virgin = ugly, handsome = not virgin. Females fuck handsome virgins only.