And I thought I missed this place. The same old shit happens, all over again. Lecture after lecture, taking notes. Having lunch. Then to the library we go or go hang out with other unwanted, outcasted ugly dudes. What an enjoyable experience man. Truly amazing. These are the best 4 years of my life. Getting up every day and trying to find a reason why I should even leave the fucking1 bed in the first 10 minutes. I know a bunch of people but have like 1 or 2 friends. It's been 3 fucking years. Now some of it is my fault, but not all.
I don't even have the motivation to study hard anymore, the one thing I've always been good at. At this point I just wing it or force myself to do it. Every day is fucking torture. Loneliness fucking sucks. I have no meaningful bonds to anybody here, the closest I have been with 99.9% of these people is greetings and surface level bullshit small talk. I could disappear today and not a single one would notice. Some of these assholes spread rumors about me 2 years ago that weren't true but it fucked my reputation. How do they expect me not to hate them?
Couple that with being forced to see the girl who rejected you every fucking day and even see her talk to other guys while she STILL avoids you even now that you've given up. Wow. I'm THAT ugly and scary? I'm THAT hideous?
I really want a way out of this. One that doesn't involve drugs, NEETmaxxing or roping.
I don't even have the motivation to study hard anymore, the one thing I've always been good at. At this point I just wing it or force myself to do it. Every day is fucking torture. Loneliness fucking sucks. I have no meaningful bonds to anybody here, the closest I have been with 99.9% of these people is greetings and surface level bullshit small talk. I could disappear today and not a single one would notice. Some of these assholes spread rumors about me 2 years ago that weren't true but it fucked my reputation. How do they expect me not to hate them?
Couple that with being forced to see the girl who rejected you every fucking day and even see her talk to other guys while she STILL avoids you even now that you've given up. Wow. I'm THAT ugly and scary? I'm THAT hideous?
I really want a way out of this. One that doesn't involve drugs, NEETmaxxing or roping.
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