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Venting Fighting my battles alone

copecopter

copecopter

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I am currently copemaxxing. It's working, I feel like 40-60% better compared to just LDARing.
I am going to the gym, taking daily walks, taking care of my hygiene, and working towards cooking my own food and going on a caloric deficit once I get some money to buy food from the mart.
I am also planning leisurely copes such as movies, shows, music, videogames, etc. as well as trying to stack YouTube channels to regularly watch.
I literally haven't talked to anyone other than my parents (online or IRL) since 2016 save for transactional supermarket banter or small talk with uni profs or some stuff like that and I will try to make some friends online (through gaming) since I can't make friends IRL.
But in light of all of this, I am alone. I have no support group. Even my parents tell me to fuck off when I try to vent and get emotional support from them.
It makes me feel empty deep down.
 
My family says things like, "tell me whats bothering you " "you can always talk to me" "i'm here for you". Then when i tell them what's bothering me and that i feel depressed and anxious they just tell me i should go to therapy or get vitamin suppliments. They also act dismissive and insult me for feeling bad and basically tell me it's my fault i fell, that i should just "be more positive and stop feeling bad!" "you have it so good, you don't know how tired i am!" etc. Like, why even offer to talk if you don't want me to? they just say that to feel morally superior.
 
I am currently copemaxxing. It's working, I feel like 40-60% better compared to just LDARing.
I am going to the gym, taking daily walks, taking care of my hygiene, and working towards cooking my own food and going on a caloric deficit once I get some money to buy food from the mart.
I am also planning leisurely copes such as movies, shows, music, videogames, etc. as well as trying to stack YouTube channels to regularly watch.
I literally haven't talked to anyone other than my parents (online or IRL) since 2016 save for transactional supermarket banter or small talk with uni profs or some stuff like that and I will try to make some friends online (through gaming) since I can't make friends IRL.
But in light of all of this, I am alone. I have no support group. Even my parents tell me to fuck off when I try to vent and get emotional support from them.
It makes me feel empty deep down.
Age?
 

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