Disclaimer: The following completed and universal typology of the female archetype was created by Alia Harkonnen (may peace upon him), our greatest Incellectual, who unfortunately ascended into the higher realms of consciousness.
[font=helvetica, arial, sans-serif]Female personality evolution
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Despite most of them being fuckable, women have to compete too. Every woman wants to not be like other women but her ability to climb up the ranks of uniqueness depends on many factors, such as her intelligence, looks, environment, inborn personality, creativity, and more. This list is quite simplified but it helps define female evolution from its simplest forms to the most complex ones.
Goal is simple and universal to all but the last type: “To maximize number of sustainable high quality orbiters and to obtain the greatest possible appreciation and commitment level from the best available Chad.”
LEVEL 1: Basic Stacy
Life revolves around being validated on social media, make up, identifying with Beyonce's songs, and Chads cock. When eventually too old for Chad to keep on fucking, she sells herself to the highest bidder, has kids, gets fatter, dies.* Chad of Choice: Justin Bieber
*keep in mind, if attractive enough, she doesn’t have to compete with anyone below level 8. Especially in Gym Stacy version, which is Basic Stacy attending gym.
LEVEL 2: Basic Stacy Deluxe
Same exact script but with some thought put into rationalizing and romanticizing it to sound deeper than it is. For example, social media obsession is actually her networking or being artistic, and the top 40 songs she identifies with are ballads sang by crap female singers with great vocal range such as Adele, which in her social group counts as having a taste. Will finish college and have some type of career in something like education, and if she ends up purposely unemployed with kids, she'll base her decision on research. She likes Chad because of his confidence and personality and when she gets pumped and dumped she'll actually overcome an abusive relationship. Chad of Choice: Christian Grey
LEVEL 3: Good Girl
Average in every single way, and less attractive than her Stacy friends without actually being ugly, she usually went unnoticed. She appeals to men by being decent and stable, which is what many look for especially in comparison to her friends who can get sponsorships just for fucking around. Often from religious or at the very least overprotective families. She doesn’t drink, doesn’t do drugs, doesn’t sleep around, is average in school, wants to marry and be a mom, and soon enough when removed from school setting where she’s surrounded by more flashy girls, she finds men who are very happy with this offer. What these husbands to be don’t understand is that they bore her to tears, that she dreams of the same Chads who fuck her best friend she’s living vicariously through, and that the only reason she isn’t living it up is fear. She’s a ticking time bomb that will blow up and result in an especially shocking affair, divorce, and sexual exploration (drunk orgies) later in life. Chad of Choice: Her beta boyfriend’s alpha best friend or her best friend Stacy’s Chad
LEVEL 4: Basic Tomboy
Can range from attractive to ugly, this one is just smart enough to perceive than despite all the attention, men don't really value basic Stacy and her "interests", especially once in a relationship with her. Being interesting doesn’t come naturally to her due to complete lack of original thought, so instead of copying basic Stacies from her circle, she copies basic Norman/Chad in an attempt to get an edge over other girls by being more fun and in tune with the male brain. So she passionately follows sports, denounces anything fancy and girly, wears only natural looking make up, and forces herself upon a group of male friends who accept her because she lets them fuck her. The other part of her personality focuses on desperately trying to please every stereotypical male desire that stereotypical Stacy stereotypically fails at. This one is a treat for the right kind of guys since in her endless quest to prove how non difficult she is and how much she gets the male mind, she tolerates being cheated on, makes sandwiches, embraces porn, and takes it up the ass. Chad of choice: male best friend who is alpha in her pack - this one doesn’t annoy men with celebrity crushes, and they aren’t masculine enough for her anyway
LEVEL 5: Quirky fat girl
Unattractive enough when compared to 50% of Stacies around her, and not athletically or socially talented enough to be one of the guys, this one is under the impression she developed a personality. That means putting a lot of thought into standing out. Usually this is achieved through elaborate and irritating fashion choices such as wearing something from the 50ies or making a certain colored lipstick her thing. She also reads. Young adult fiction, of course. Thinks she's a bit of a geek cause she talks to her more nerdy male friends about Harry Potter and acts like she too has a crush on Emma Watson. Attempts humor a lot, think Amy Schumer. Men actually can't stand her but is a relatively easy fuck during her younger days which leads to resentment and turning to popular feminism later in life. Then she becomes a typical twox/askfemales poster explaining how women wear make up for themselves and how objectified she felt that one time when a drunk guy catcalled her although/because she knows he was actually addressing her friend. Has an office job and cats. Chad of Choice: supporting vampire character from Twilight whose fantasy gay relationships she writes fanfictions about (she knows the saga sucks but it’s her “guilty pleasure”)
LEVEL 6: Tomboy Deluxe (also known as The Gamer Girl)
Good looking and a bit smarter than the average tomboy, she doesn’t have to sell herself short to get an edge over basic Stacy. Claims to get along better with men but makes sure to look cute during. She wants her beta orbiters to really worship her and finds she can get more adoration from the romantic “nerdy” crowd. There she can also find Chads with better earning potential and more willingness to commit than when fishing among average jocks. Since she perfected the formula of mixing universally popular geeky interests (as long as they don’t require too much effort getting into) and cleavage, her ego is over the roof. This also makes her get bored of most men (never the attention though) which makes her sadistic until the right Chad comes along and makes her his bdsm bitch. Chad of Choice: The Joker
LEVEL 7: The Intellectual
LEVEL 7: The Intellectual
Smarter than Gamer Girl, this one is actually able to read a book that isn’t young adult fiction and watch a three hour long black and white European movie where everyone smokes and feels unhappy. She gets some form of personal pleasure from it although mostly just because she knows she’s one of the rare ones who get it. Got into a decent college and will never miss the chance to mention her degrees, including during online arguments. Normally tries to get at least a few of those because being a college student is important to her identity. Is a more advanced level feminist, environmentally and politically aware, liberal, likes to think she’s cynical but is really just sarcastic when applicable. Worked hard to obtain resting bitch face and to appear as disinterested with everything as possible, including sex. Has few friends with benefits among her philosophy student male friends who validate her as a fascinating, smart and witty individual she’s not. Once they turn exclusive men tend to develop deep loathing for her, which is fine because she loathes them back. Chad of Choice: Her philosophy or English literature professor, at least until they finally have sex
LEVEL 8: Manic Pixie Dream Girl
LEVEL 8: Manic Pixie Dream Girl
Very beautiful face that always made men idolize her over slutty big tittied Stacies. Never really felt overly pressured to compete with women in her surrounding because men always fell in love with her whenever she smiled at them. Isn’t completely dumb but her energy is mainly focused on unproductive self analysis because everyone convinced her she's fascinating. What she needs validated is that this is really true, because on some level she knows that she is actually pretty boring. Her challenge is picking the right Chad worth settling for, and in the process she breaks many men’s hearts and egos. She doesn’t really know what to focus on and doesn’t like to feel like a bad person, so she deals with her hypergamy by creating a very flaky, inconsistent personality that mirrors adored and special types of women in popular culture. Often turns to drugs out of boredom but without seriously committing to them either, and develops existential depression every time she gets too settled into anything, because she is never sure if she’s missing out on something better. She looks for artistic talent Chads to provide what she herself can’t in her hopeless, exhausting attempts to be creative. Her taste in art boils down to her appreciating whatever is pretentious enough to make her think she doesn't get it. Chad of Choice: Lead singers from hipster bands such as Arctic Monkeys
LEVEL 9: The Unicorn
LEVEL 9: The Unicorn
Had at least one big trauma or unhappy childhood which fucked her up, combined with receiving extreme adoration from men later in life. This created a fun mix of insecurity and ego, and a few mental disorders. She is usually a very sexually conflicted asexual. She has a good ability to at least subconsciously read people and she adapts her personality to mirror the fantasies of the men she is talking to. This is because she is always looking to be everyone’s everything. Her introductions are great, after which she enters a depressive phase and then goes into total destruction mode. Because she wants to leave a lasting impact without restricting herself to one person or one life, she does it by leaving scars so that they think of her even in her absence. She can’t fall in love with individual men, and is mainly solipsistic. Thinks of herself as completely emotionally empty and most likely is an addict, but can keep on bouncing back for a while due to everyone in the world wanting to support her. Chad of Choice: N/A
Level 10: Level 9 that manages to murder you and through it become the most significant person in your life while also being free of you and able to play the same crucial role in other people's lives. Role only reserved for a small percentage of female psychopaths, but if you're searching for one, places like this is where you find them so don't stop believing....
Level 10: Level 9 that manages to murder you and through it become the most significant person in your life while also being free of you and able to play the same crucial role in other people's lives. Role only reserved for a small percentage of female psychopaths, but if you're searching for one, places like this is where you find them so don't stop believing....
