I remember how often I've heard people saying how "you have to get out there and MAKE things happen!" and all this. I do think it's true, at least for men. Women I think get a lot more attention from the world and more of a feeling of being wanted.
A problem I find with having to make everything happen is that nothing feels like it means anything. I sort of want the world to "come to me" from time to time. Not all the time but just sometimes.
I'm not sure what the solution is. I can think of things from the past that would have made someone feel wanted - a tribe, a community, church, a family business. All these things have been pretty much jettisoned from modern life though these days.