Life in the last 6 months have been complicated to say the least. I never thought someone like myself would ever find myself in an extramarital affair, but here I am, sleeping around with a man I met at work last year. I noticed the chemistry and attraction between us grew out of a natural consequence of being around each other, and regularly meeting up for coffee, not to shoot the breeze or chitchat, but generally to assess the specifics of the projects we'd be working on at the time. In the first week of March, this year, there was a sudden power outage at a crucial point of our work, which meant that the eatery downstairs wouldn't suffice. It was either the public library or his place, and given that the latter was only a stone's throw away, I went with the latter suggestion to avoid looking square. Once there, our usual banter and jokes helped break the awkwardness of the situation, and, well, one thing led to the next. I ended up doing something I never thought I was capable of, that, is having sex with a man not my husband. In the following months and weeks I would meet with him more often, all the while taking precautions against COVID. It's just things are so different now, I feel as if I'm living an entirely different life apart from the one I've always known, not that it's a bad thing but I've been questioning my identity, my very being, at a deeper level than before. Don't get me wrong, I love my husband and my faith, but I also love where I'm at even though I often feel conflicted. I know religion is frowned upon in most adultery circles, but it is essential to who I am, and I'm just trying to find a way to keep myself afloat, both mentally and spiritually. I think goes without saying that we all sin, and learning how to deal with your demons is something unique to each person's experience. To that end, I would love to hear other people's stories and how they deal with their front stage and back stage personalities.
