Well it started with weird beliefs / delusions that would basically cause me to feel bad whenever I moved too much or made the wrong movements. These beliefs were gradually developed over several months. So I started moving according to my intuition and sometimes stay at one place until I felt I was "finished" with my movements, which would sometimes go on for hours.
At some point I also started hearing voices and this was when I was admitted in the mental hospital. I lost all my appetite, so I mostly stopped eating, and I also stopped talking. I would also feel bad whenever I moved too much causing me to sometimes remain in the same posture for hours. That's where I got the catatonia diagnosis from. I continued hearing voices and limiting my movements for 4 months. Then they gave me forced electroshock therapy which caused me to try to escape and started eating more again, and slowly my old thoughts also came back and the voices dissappeared, and I felt relatively safe making normal movements again. I sometimes still hear a voice in the background but it's muffled so I can't make out what it says.
Sometimes the voices I heard would replace the voices of nurses, so I heard them saying really weird things, and I would only focus on the meaning of gestures and the tone of voice. I would look at the discongruency of what people said and at which tone they spoke it, and this would confuse me. It really felt like I was in some kind of jungle were the nurses were just as crazy as the patients.
