I thought of this earlier and in my experiences I've noticed that if you are friendly or care too much, actually you end up being despised. It seems counterintuitive, but actually being selfish is probably the best way to gain respect or admiration. In particular you'll notice in groups most people dont actually listen to what anyone else says. They just wait until their chance to butt in and talk at the other person.
I think this is because socializing for NTs is not exactly as straightforward as a mere exchange of words. Mostly I think the information meant to be conveyed is on a layer below the actual words spoken. It is to display and maintain status on a social hierarchy, therefore it's not important what words are said more so what is important is making the other party submit and listen to what you are saying and validate you.
Being a good listener therefore is actually the worst of social mistakes you could make. If you aren't a NT chances are you are listening only to better understand and contribute to the discussion, but to NT ape minds, you listening carefully only signals to them that you must be low status/weak/desperate and therefore not worthwhile. Another way of looking at it is scarcity of resources...
If you give your attention easily then you only make it an overabundant resource and devalue yourself. That's why I now think if you are an incel the smartest path in your own self interest is to withdraw socially, do not give any attention or energy towards others. Otherwise you're basically being metaphysically cucked of your mental vitality.
Thoughts?
I think this is because socializing for NTs is not exactly as straightforward as a mere exchange of words. Mostly I think the information meant to be conveyed is on a layer below the actual words spoken. It is to display and maintain status on a social hierarchy, therefore it's not important what words are said more so what is important is making the other party submit and listen to what you are saying and validate you.
Being a good listener therefore is actually the worst of social mistakes you could make. If you aren't a NT chances are you are listening only to better understand and contribute to the discussion, but to NT ape minds, you listening carefully only signals to them that you must be low status/weak/desperate and therefore not worthwhile. Another way of looking at it is scarcity of resources...
If you give your attention easily then you only make it an overabundant resource and devalue yourself. That's why I now think if you are an incel the smartest path in your own self interest is to withdraw socially, do not give any attention or energy towards others. Otherwise you're basically being metaphysically cucked of your mental vitality.
Thoughts?
