I’m a bit below average but in spite of that I think this sub is a positive community to share experiences and problems in.
When we started dating my gf used to really enjoy my fingers, but I ordered a sleeve and thus she really enjoys that or when we use vibrating dildos when we’re together. That’s more or less over the course of 3 years slowly I expanded my mind to what I was open to. She doesn’t really want my fingers and more and I feel like I have to use a ton on pressure on her G spot at just the right one to make her cum when I used to be able to make her cum with my fingers in under a minute and multiple thereafter.
In the past year I got a vibrating wand with a blunt head and she really likes it. Never before would she ever like me touching her clit, I would have to beg her and she would let me eat her out on my birthday or special occasions because it’s something I enjoy and it’s not like I’m not open to making it a pleasurable experience for her, I’ve tried everything but she find tongues, fingers, and sucking on her clit uncomfortable.
Now she talked to me about getting an oddly shaped toy that’s super girthy in the base because that’s what she thinks would get her off. I feel kinda useless in a way even though I agree to letting her use these things I feel like she is so accustomed to it that I’m no good at making her feel good anymore.
Hurting my self esteem. I’ve told her in the past that I’m pretty self conscious about my sexual ability and size and she’s pretty reassuring with me and she likes to make me cum with her mouth as well, yet it’s still so painful to not be able to do something I used to be able to.
When we first started exploring toys I remember I used to carefully look at usable length to kinda vet them to be less than 7x5” but she sometimes finds them on her own and they can be much girthier than im comfortable with. I feel like I set a precedent I can’t reverse without leaving her unsatisfied.
