I can't believe I've been coping about my looks for so long. I look so disgusting, what a fucking joke, I just had a deep look into the mirror and can't help but laugh at how absurd this shit is. I've just looked through my old photos, not a very difficult task since I barely ever take pictures (guess why), and yeah, I've always been pretty ugly even when I was gymmaxxed I was at best a 4 on my good day 8 years ago. My entire life is fucked because of the way I look. Every encounter I ever had, every time I got treated like shit it can all be traced back to looks.
I will never forget when I was larping at my restaurant job that I had a girlfriend and one of the ugly 1/10 landwhale teenager workers there said "See, even he has a girlfriend!". That was so fucking brutal to hear, that 'even I' have a GF, as if I am not even a fucking human being. Little moments like that, when people spoke the truth by accident really hurt so bad. That stupid whore did not even realize the significance of her words, the magnitude of the insult she just made towards me, for her it was normal to be surprised to hear a subhuman like me could have a girlfriend, it was so fucking natural she did not even begin to question what she just implied towards me. I mogged that bitch by the way, and yet her life will be infinitely easier than mine. She is probably already pumpedNdumped by multiple chads by now.
I've been coping with blackpill for a very long time now. But this is no way to live a life. There is only so long you can cope. I honestly don't want to live another 30 years+ like this, I am so fucking done with this dogshit life. If this is what my life is going to look like for the rest of my days then fuck that, I'm done.
I've been contemplating ending it all, but I am still holding on to my SEAmaxx copium, though back in my head I kind of think it's not going to work but ehh... I might as well do it before I kill myself so I don't regret anything. I am giving it my final shot, losing all the weight, going to the lowest BMI I was in my adult life, getting relatively fit, getting a facial surgery and hair surgery with scalp micropigmentation. Wearing eye coloured contacts, lifts, and all the other looksmaxx frauding I can possibly think of.
My goal is very simple, all I fucking want is one single woman to give me the time of day for a single night without me having to resort to pay for it. If I can get that then maybe I'll keep around but otherwise I'm calling it quits out of this gay ass world.
I will never forget when I was larping at my restaurant job that I had a girlfriend and one of the ugly 1/10 landwhale teenager workers there said "See, even he has a girlfriend!". That was so fucking brutal to hear, that 'even I' have a GF, as if I am not even a fucking human being. Little moments like that, when people spoke the truth by accident really hurt so bad. That stupid whore did not even realize the significance of her words, the magnitude of the insult she just made towards me, for her it was normal to be surprised to hear a subhuman like me could have a girlfriend, it was so fucking natural she did not even begin to question what she just implied towards me. I mogged that bitch by the way, and yet her life will be infinitely easier than mine. She is probably already pumpedNdumped by multiple chads by now.
I've been coping with blackpill for a very long time now. But this is no way to live a life. There is only so long you can cope. I honestly don't want to live another 30 years+ like this, I am so fucking done with this dogshit life. If this is what my life is going to look like for the rest of my days then fuck that, I'm done.
I've been contemplating ending it all, but I am still holding on to my SEAmaxx copium, though back in my head I kind of think it's not going to work but ehh... I might as well do it before I kill myself so I don't regret anything. I am giving it my final shot, losing all the weight, going to the lowest BMI I was in my adult life, getting relatively fit, getting a facial surgery and hair surgery with scalp micropigmentation. Wearing eye coloured contacts, lifts, and all the other looksmaxx frauding I can possibly think of.
My goal is very simple, all I fucking want is one single woman to give me the time of day for a single night without me having to resort to pay for it. If I can get that then maybe I'll keep around but otherwise I'm calling it quits out of this gay ass world.
