I_am_An_Abomination
addicted to cigarettes and weed
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- Joined
- Aug 31, 2025
- Posts
- 21
The last time I was friends with a girl was during my senior year of high school, this girl, let's call her Stacy because honestly I still have fondness for her in my memories to say her real name, was my friend for two years of high school, she was funny, really, that kind of girl who has the same tastes and humor as you, who seems to read your mind, she wasn't perfect, she used to be very dumb in my opinion, she used to complicate her life with friendships of which she would always tell me some problems, if this boy used his traumas to make her feel bad, if this girl talked bad about her behind her back, if this other girl used her as emotional support, and blah blah blah, I always told her to send them all to hell, at the end of the day she would have me, someone who wouldn't screw up her existence with problems and who would be her best friend, someone with whom she really had a good time all the time, but whenever I answered her like that she seemed disgusted with that idea, maybe having only one friend seemed depressing to her, but it was better than spending your life worrying about what the hell a person is going to bring you any day now, she was definitely an idiot, or maybe I was just really cynical, whatever, in the last few months of senior year, she told me she wanted to go to university, to study the arts, and that maybe I should apply and choose a degree too, and I was like "why?", that shit only brings debt and you end up with a fake degree, I was honest with her, I told her she'd probably end up with a shitty job if she studied for a degree and probably with university debt too, and if she wanted to aspire to something more or something decent, she should start working as soon as she finished high school, that it was better to gain work experience than waste years studying for a degree, she got angry, I didn't understand why, to me she was just blinded by an exhausting optimism and that "strive for your dreams" air, after that she didn't speak to me the whole day, and eventually she blocked me on everything. social networks and also my number, I deduced that maybe she was hurt, so I left her alone for a while to calm down, after the graduation party and a month and a half without hearing from her (because even inside school she began to avoid me at all costs), I went to look for her at her house, but it turned out that she had already left her parents' house, they told me that she had entered a university far from our commune, so she decided to move, with borrowed money from them, to an apartment closer to the university, I'm not going to lie to you, at that moment I thought she was a childish bitch, did it hurt her that much that I told her the truth? I decided to leave her alone, understanding the message of her actions, so don't ask what university she went to, at that moment I didn't care, I let her do what she wanted with her life.
And now I feel like I should have acted more empathetically, maybe been less sincere with her, because honestly after that my bad experiences with girls and my loneliness began, after leaving my mother's house and taking the first job that would accept me, the truth is I would like to know about her, even if it's just to apologize for being so cynical, although I feel like she wouldn't recognize me, and I feel like she would be disgusted to see me.
And now I feel like I should have acted more empathetically, maybe been less sincere with her, because honestly after that my bad experiences with girls and my loneliness began, after leaving my mother's house and taking the first job that would accept me, the truth is I would like to know about her, even if it's just to apologize for being so cynical, although I feel like she wouldn't recognize me, and I feel like she would be disgusted to see me.
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