J
Early in my life, I was a happy little person, I enjoyed being with other kids having fun. I am a person with humour, I am sensible for other people's feelings, soft hearted.
I used to have "friends" and all that, but always the same happened after some time. I was the bottom of the group, the "trash friend", if nobody else was there I was good enough.
Well, life has changed me. My facial expression is naturally serious or even evil. I try to not to feel the feelings. I try not to show it when I'm hurt. People might think this dude doesn't care about anything. But deep inside, It just hurts so bad. Everytime when I recognize being treaten like shit.
I even went to therapy. What a bluepilled bullshit! The foid therapist told me the classic crap with confidence and all that shit. That I could have a pretty girlfriend one day. I used to be kind of - now we call if blackbilled - but at one point I took this fancy bluepill the therapist gave me and tried to "work on myself".
Years have passed, I tried so fucking hard to get a job. To not be the weird creep everyone looks down on. Tried to find new friends - same as always.
But after none of this worked out, I decided to voluntarily be antisocial. Stay at home alone. It is good not to play the clown for "friends" or "colleagues". Just be by myself.
But I am a human being! Even one with a sensible heart. I would need appreciation, I would need love, friends, conversing, going out, all that. But it's not worth it.
After all, my conclusion is: I rather suffer in not being sociable, not fulfill this existential human need of social interaction, than being let down all day. Being laughed at, being excluded, being ignored, being hated by foids and other normies.
So yes, my life sucks. It sucks fucking hard. But it still sucks less than back when I had social interaction like in school.
I used to have "friends" and all that, but always the same happened after some time. I was the bottom of the group, the "trash friend", if nobody else was there I was good enough.
Well, life has changed me. My facial expression is naturally serious or even evil. I try to not to feel the feelings. I try not to show it when I'm hurt. People might think this dude doesn't care about anything. But deep inside, It just hurts so bad. Everytime when I recognize being treaten like shit.
I even went to therapy. What a bluepilled bullshit! The foid therapist told me the classic crap with confidence and all that shit. That I could have a pretty girlfriend one day. I used to be kind of - now we call if blackbilled - but at one point I took this fancy bluepill the therapist gave me and tried to "work on myself".
Years have passed, I tried so fucking hard to get a job. To not be the weird creep everyone looks down on. Tried to find new friends - same as always.
But after none of this worked out, I decided to voluntarily be antisocial. Stay at home alone. It is good not to play the clown for "friends" or "colleagues". Just be by myself.
But I am a human being! Even one with a sensible heart. I would need appreciation, I would need love, friends, conversing, going out, all that. But it's not worth it.
After all, my conclusion is: I rather suffer in not being sociable, not fulfill this existential human need of social interaction, than being let down all day. Being laughed at, being excluded, being ignored, being hated by foids and other normies.
So yes, my life sucks. It sucks fucking hard. But it still sucks less than back when I had social interaction like in school.
