I obtained an adderall prescription when I was in middle school, took it for a year and stopped. Then I obtained another during my Sophomore year in high school (was at an all boys Catholic boarding school that specialized in sports, was basically 90% jock Chad student body who even maintained girlfriends despite spending 90% of their time boarding there and not able to bring them to visit. My grades were excellent at first then dropped to shit because of depression)and have been abusing it ever since (18, graduated last year). I only am prescribed 40 mg a day, but whenever I pick up my refill I binge anywhere from 60-120 mg for days at a time and spend around the next three weeks feeling like total shit but it was worth it for that week long dopamine bender and meat-beat mania, then shame, then compulsively learning new subjects and skills that interest me as my fear of death or stupidity starts to cast it's shadow over me. that basically pharmacologically and psychologically replaces the dopamine realease that my sex or even social life would provide, if it existed at all.
