DarkKnight
Positivecel
-
- Joined
- Nov 26, 2018
- Posts
- 178
Title
i worried less about the future
thats about it
I miss my libido. Fapping felt like heaven back then.
Some of my teachers were cool too.
25, and yes IMEWait if you don't mind me asking how old are you now? it stops feeling amazing eventually?
I do, even though it was very mediocre and I still got problems and mild bullying, it was undoubtedly the best period of my life.
I go to the area of my high school periodically (like every six months or so) to reminisce about those memories, there's a park near it, in which I used to go to events after school (or skipped classes to go there), so it's nice.
I didn't ascend back then, the classes absolutely sucked (I'm so glad I don't have to see anything from physics and chemistry anymore) and I didn't keep a single friendship from those times, but I miss being young, better-looking than ever and full of dreams and hopes, starting to walk around by myself and attending to shit like those events.
Yeah, life after your late 20s kinda sucks. I get why people have kids, because you already feel like a background character anyway, so better at least create a new main character which you can influence and in whose life you can participate directly.Holy shit bro I graduated a year ago and this just hit me right in the face. U truly never get those times back.
Nothing to miss about constantly shifting schools because I never fit in. Or the fact that I went to sit in an empty room that was open during cafeteria hours to avoid embarrassing myself from sitting alone. Or may it was having my lunchbox thrown in the toilet while the bully smiled with his girlfriend waiting for him outside the bathroom. Or it could just be that I came home every day wanting each day to be over because I had no friends and spent my day writings because it was my only comfort in life.
Not really. I had no money, no power and no friends. I had to get up early and go someplace I don't want to be and do things I didn't want to do. It was like wageslaving minus the wage. I was unaware of my ugliness (I was athletic and martialartsmaxxed so no one was telling me I'm ugly) so I had hope and I used to gett very frustrated when I couldn't figure out why girls despised me.
These days I do what I want when I want and I don't hope for things because I know there is no hope.
Rough man, do you prefer adulthood better though?
proud of youI’m still living and counting down the days until the end of this year when I officially move out. Not as bad, just treated with different scenarios.
Back then I might have been an incel, but at least i could spend my time ldaring and enjoying myself.
But now I'm an incel and i have to (((be a man))), aka become a wageslave
i worried less about the future
thats about it
I second this, Im 22 and still in the same spot as I was at 16 and its horrible
When youre a broke loser virgin at 16 you dont get as much shit from everyone because youre just 16 and its kind of expected, at 22 having no money or gf means youre a massive failure and you pretty much get ridiculed for it
Being a broke loser virgin at 22 just hurts
Also i miss having no responsibilities apart from hs and not worrying about my future
being a kid and feeling like nothing i do matters (meaning i can do anything) yet still having hope for my future is probably the thing i miss the most
school was nothing but forced interactions but they were interactions i came to miss. at least i could get lucky and get the 10/10 girl to be assigned my lab partner and everytime she looks into the microscope i can see down her blouse. or the dumb as fuck 11/10 who is my speech partner and followed my instructions to the tee and got her first 100% grade ever in her life and came up to hug me and the next day found me in homeroom and told me about how she told her family and they were all so proud of her and she was proud of herself. she will always remember that grade and ill always remember that hug. it felt like i won the fucking lotto. to have a girls arms around you and the way they smell. like flowers but better. a ton of guys thought I was Chad for a few days since they thought the hug meant we were dating. i didnt say no and reliahed in the moment.
but then school finished. HS is over and then you go to college which is an even more Chad atmosphere and different structure so you go totally unnoticed. nobody ever talks to you and now teachers dont even care if you show up to class or not. you become invisible to everyone.
then you go to work and all these demands are placed on you from the start. no room for error. no breaks. work until you die with no fun at all and that is when you realize HS was definitely your best moment in life. you looked better. you had youth. you were smarter. the only stress was finishing your homework. at least you talked a few times throughout the day to students and teachers. i can go weeks at work talking to nobody because we do everything by email and IM. then i come home to a dark apartment and stare at my reflection in a lit up computer screen as i type away on here. then it is off to bed. hoping i die soon
i don't miss it but i wish i could re-do some things