https://publicinformant.com/2019/08...plaining-about-things-says-hopeful-new-study/
GLOBAL NEWS
A new study released by the American Psychiatric Journal of Brain Diseases reveals that poverty (medically labeled as Depression, Anxiety, drug seeking, not having confidence, ‘being lazy’, ‘having a breakdown’, not being grateful etc) has an effective medical treatment.
Lead author of the study, Mark Gaslighterssimo, decided to conduct the double-blind trial on 70 millennials with a negative net worth who were 30 years old and playing video games half the day in their parents house. He found that after repeat oral administrations of Seroquel and SSRIs, the men no longer posted angry rants on social media about loneliness and were no longer fearful of the future.
Jordan Peterson
Mark, an avid Fox News fan decided to conduct the study after watching a video by prominent academic Jordan Peterson. He said he once enjoyed Peterson, particularly when Peterson discusses how welfare recipients need to clean their room, but one video made him feel uncomfortable. In the video Peterson discusses evidence that extreme and persistent human suffering may be simply caused by social exclusion and being low-status. Reminscent of the writings of the late Italian anti-psychiatrist Franco Basaglia. Seeking to disprove Jordan’s argument in the video, which he felt have had too much influence on public discourse, he began his Seroquel study.
Criticism
Responding to criticism about the study being laughable, Mark and his colleagues later commented that although this is not a complete solution, this is part of the ‘healing process of recovery’. Although there was no evidence the men beat placebo by more than 4 points on the Hamilton Depression Rating scale (what is generally considered a clinically significant response rather than a statistically significant response), they looked more calm.
A Job Well Done
Due to the study, which has been published widely, the local San Fransico (the city mark lives in) police have decided to involuntarily admit homeless people into psychiatric hospitals that had spare rooms so that they can get drugged up. Mark plans to take a trip to Bermuda to discuss his findings with a 100 thousand dollar grant from Yale University.
GLOBAL NEWS
A new study released by the American Psychiatric Journal of Brain Diseases reveals that poverty (medically labeled as Depression, Anxiety, drug seeking, not having confidence, ‘being lazy’, ‘having a breakdown’, not being grateful etc) has an effective medical treatment.
Lead author of the study, Mark Gaslighterssimo, decided to conduct the double-blind trial on 70 millennials with a negative net worth who were 30 years old and playing video games half the day in their parents house. He found that after repeat oral administrations of Seroquel and SSRIs, the men no longer posted angry rants on social media about loneliness and were no longer fearful of the future.
Jordan Peterson
Mark, an avid Fox News fan decided to conduct the study after watching a video by prominent academic Jordan Peterson. He said he once enjoyed Peterson, particularly when Peterson discusses how welfare recipients need to clean their room, but one video made him feel uncomfortable. In the video Peterson discusses evidence that extreme and persistent human suffering may be simply caused by social exclusion and being low-status. Reminscent of the writings of the late Italian anti-psychiatrist Franco Basaglia. Seeking to disprove Jordan’s argument in the video, which he felt have had too much influence on public discourse, he began his Seroquel study.
Criticism
Responding to criticism about the study being laughable, Mark and his colleagues later commented that although this is not a complete solution, this is part of the ‘healing process of recovery’. Although there was no evidence the men beat placebo by more than 4 points on the Hamilton Depression Rating scale (what is generally considered a clinically significant response rather than a statistically significant response), they looked more calm.
The millennials motivation to find a job also went down, but the researcher concluded that if they do not die on the streets, group homes might force them to work anyway.
A Job Well Done
Due to the study, which has been published widely, the local San Fransico (the city mark lives in) police have decided to involuntarily admit homeless people into psychiatric hospitals that had spare rooms so that they can get drugged up. Mark plans to take a trip to Bermuda to discuss his findings with a 100 thousand dollar grant from Yale University.
