No, not really.
I think most people have this misconception that they do things to have new pleasurable experiences, or rather, they assume that they pursue their goals in an effort to raise their mood above some sort of neutral state. However this doesn't really make sense, because if you were to examine the motivations behind a desire, it becomes clear that some form of discontentment is what motivates it.
Since the topic is sex, ask yourself, why do you want sex? Did you always want it? Obviously I never wanted sex until puberty, and if you were to explain the need/desire to me as a kid, I'd have never understood what you meant. This isn't because base desires are difficult to understand, as I don't think that any of this is really all that different from hunger tbh, it's just that you can't explain it to someone who hasn't felt it. Once my body forced the desire for females upon me, I began to feel worse. Now even if I were to gain what it is that I wanted, in reality I wouldn't be truly gaining anything at all, since I would only be reducing or eliminating the imposed deprivation.
The more that I thought about it, the more that I realized pretty much all of my desires, the whole reason why I do anything, well it's all in an effort to get my body to stop making me feel like shit. From what I can tell, when people experience pleasure, they're measuring a reduction in negative value as opposed to experiencing the creation of something positive. Even if you do what your body tortures you into do, the goalpost just gets moves, and you either want even more of it, or something new entirely. So no, I don't think that sexhavers are satisfied, however I'd imagine they usually feel less bad than we do, that is unless their brains just give them another reason entirely to be miserable.
Yeah, well the problem is that I look at things logically, I'm too honest with myself. Shit like therapy for instance often tries to get you to somehow change your beliefs about things that happened to you, even without acquiring new information. The goal is basically to get you to believe that what happened didn't happen, and that you're mistaken about your conclusions.
Lets say you've got an incel with a history of negative reinforcement, well if you tell him that all those experiences don't matter, or somehow don't apply(whether true or not), then he might be more inclined to pursue a relationship since he now believes in the possibility of success. This sort of thing can actually be helpful if the problem is exclusively learned helplessness, but that won't really help us with relationships, since we would just experience more rejection. You don't really recover from being a social reject after a certain point, even if you surgerymaxxed or something, people won't let you catch up. Not to mention all the other problems we might have in this regard, which have just compounded over the years.
Tbh if I could just lie myself to make all of this go away, I would. But it wouldn't really go away, and I'm incapable of doing this anyway.
