Venting Why The Insults I Received Stung so Badly

[Intellectual]

I thought I had tough skin before joining this server. I've taken bullying, harassment, and insults towards my biggest insecurity; of course my face. I thought I was over letting others influence my mental state, I was swiftly proven wrong. I have spent the past day pondering why. Yesterday I threw a fit of anger and rage, I cried going to bed. I felt surprisingly upbeat this morning, a night of sleep to help organize my subliminally warring thoughts. I think I know why I was so upset at the challenging remarks.

NEVER MEET YOUR HEROS!
I genuinely lurked this forum for a great deal amount of time before joining. I came to know many of you, and respect your posts. Although you didn't know me, I felt a bubbling relationship. Much like how my teenaged self once viewed Pewdiepie as a personal friend, I came to view you guys as my real friends. I trusted you guys, came to admire your personalities, I truly felt I loved many of you. Seeing those I felt I foolishly felt I was on close terms with throw jarring insults at me struck a nerve I thought was long desensitized. It's one thing to be attacked by those you hate, it's another to be attacked by those you love. Arthur Fleck did an incredible job at demonstrating the sheer disappointment and betrayal one feels to be mocked by your hero, in his case Murray Franklin. I still have no given up, and I hope one day we can be friends, but for now I feel nothing but betrayal and treachery in my heart.

 

[FUCK FAGGOT LINK]

you posted a face pic?

 

[Intellectual]

you posted a face pic?

No, I meant in general, throughout life I have been bullied for looks. I thought I was over it because I've become hardened to it.

 

[FUCK FAGGOT LINK]

it happens to everyone, GrAY. dont take anything here personally

 

[FUCK FAGGOT LINK]

No, I meant in general, throughout life I have been bullied for looks. I thought I was over it because I've become hardened to it.

how have people bullied you for looks here

 

[Intellectual]

it happens to everyone, GrAY. dont take anything here personally

Thanks friend, I do appreciate it.

how have people bullied you for looks here

They haven't, they just mocked me for my posts.

 

[PLA1092]

Useless ugly piece of shit incel, KYS now and leave this forum. You will never serve a purpose to anyone you meet. You are a weak puppy dog bitch.

 

[PLA1092]

Useless ugly piece of shit incel, KYS now and leave this forum. You will never serve a purpose to anyone you meet. You are a weak puppy dog bitch.

View attachment 778426

Just kidding.

 

[Lonelyus]

I felt surprisingly upbeat this morning, a night of sleep to help organize my subliminally warring thoughts. I think I know why I was so upset at the challenging remarks.

You are coming to terms with the blackpill, It was hard for me too.

 

[FUCK FAGGOT LINK]

They haven't, they just mocked me for my posts.

thats part of our culture every new user will experience, Joined Monday at 1:06 AM

 

[Intellectual]

You are coming to terms with the blackpill, It was hard for me too.

I've been blackpilled for a long time now.

 

[BPJ]

jfl@taking anything here personally

 

[Lonelyus]

I thought I had tough skin before joining this server. I've taken bullying, harassment, and insults towards my biggest insecurity; of course my face. I thought I was over letting others influence my mental state, I was swiftly proven wrong. I have spent the past day pondering why. Yesterday I threw a fit of anger and rage, I cried going to bed. I felt surprisingly upbeat this morning, a night of sleep to help organize my subliminally warring thoughts. I think I know why I was so upset at the challenging remarks.

NEVER MEET YOUR HEROS!
I genuinely lurked this forum for a great deal amount of time before joining. I came to know many of you, and respect your posts. Although you didn't know me, I felt a bubbling relationship. Much like how my teenaged self once viewed Pewdiepie as a personal friend, I came to view you guys as my real friends. I trusted you guys, came to admire your personalities, I truly felt I loved many of you. Seeing those I felt I foolishly felt I was on close terms with throw jarring insults at me struck a nerve I thought was long desensitized. It's one thing to be attacked by those you hate, it's another to be attacked by those you love. Arthur Fleck did an incredible job at demonstrating the sheer disappointment and betrayal one feels to be mocked by your hero, in his case Murray Franklin. I still have no given up, and I hope one day we can be friends, but for now I feel nothing but betrayal and treachery in my heart.

I've been blackpilled for a long time now.

It takes longer than that man, Ive been in so many rooms and so many different computer screens, Ive rotted so long that some of my computer screens died of age and im only 23, In between waging which stopped 2 years ago which i did for 7+ years it wasnt before 19 i got blackpilled, i thought i could reverse it, I went in harder sick of screentime, Jogging, Working on myself, Talking to people, Nada, I was just told i was ugly, And on a school trip to another country i was told by my best friend i made in college that i am the ugliest thing he ever seen. This happened every school year, I never gave up tho, I thought hard working would work, My parents kept feeding it to me that all i needed was confidence and hard work, Eventually i confronted them about it, They sat me down and talked about me needing more personality, That chads arent the only one that get laid, That is kind of true some incels have ascended, But its not for all of us, I did my best and failed heroically,Work, Play vidya sleep, 7+ years and finished college aswell as college is 1 year in my country, My friends there found other friends, In the middle of the year i had maybe 1 or 2 to chat with because of music, We were both into bands, Bc im subhuman the chad stole my friends and i was left alone to rot for the rest of the year, Mostly playing cod bo on my PS3 and zombies in my dorm room cut off from the world with only mobile data and shit, I was allowed to move my PS3 to my room due to my anxiety issues and my autism, It used to be in the living room dorm room and i lived with 3 other autistis, One was completely ocd and complaind whenever theres a damn remote on the table which was absolutely FUCKING insane.

I worked and worked after college again after rotting for a while and eventually i saw how little money i got i said fuck it and left, I didnt return to work for a few days because i was pissed over my earnings, Later that year i fucking quit, My parents kept driving me to the workplace if i refused to go, I had severe agoraphobia and i felt insanely fucked, So much i wanna fucking die, On barely no sleep, Nothing i was used as a cog in the machine for minimal pay, And all the jobs now require 4+ years permits if i want good pay, I dont have that time because next year ill be 24 and ill be 28 at the end which will leave me as a man that would hit the wall anyway, Not that i havent before bc im ugly, I hit the wall as a baby.

I could somewhat blame my parents for this aswell for not fixing my uneven jew nose and not having me at an earlier age, My brother and sister turned out to come out fine, At this point i just want to lay down in a grave and die, They are further in life and have aleredy procreated, They were given the same advice "Confidence"

TBH, It takes alot of time to ingest the blackpill, Welcome to the forum gray.

 

[Lonelyus]

jfl@taking anything here personally

Are you making the video we talked about? The one about whitecels and how they can improve?

 

[Intellectual]

It takes longer than that man, Ive been in so many rooms and so many different computer screens, Ive rotted so long that some of my computer screens died of age and im only 23, In between waging which stopped 2 years ago which i did for 7+ years it wasnt before 19 i got blackpilled, i thought i could reverse it, I went in harder sick of screentime, Jogging, Working on myself, Talking to people, Nada, I was just told i was ugly, And on a school trip to another country i was told by my best friend i made in college that i am the ugliest thing he ever seen. This happened every school year, I never gave up tho, I thought hard working would work, My parents kept feeding it to me that all i needed was confidence and hard work, Eventually i confronted them about it, They sat me down and talked about me needing more personality, That chads arent the only one that get laid, That is kind of true some incels have ascended, But its not for all of us, I did my best and failed heroically,Work, Play vidya sleep, 7+ years and finished college aswell as college is 1 year in my country, My friends there found other friends, In the middle of the year i had maybe 1 or 2 to chat with because of music, We were both into bands, Bc im subhuman the chad stole my friends and i was left alone to rot for the rest of the year, Mostly playing cod bo on my PS3 and zombies in my dorm room cut off from the world with only mobile data and shit, I was allowed to move my PS3 to my room due to my anxiety issues and my autism, It used to be in the living room dorm room and i lived with 3 other autistis, One was completely ocd and complaind whenever theres a damn remote on the table which was absolutely FUCKING insane.

I worked and worked after college again after rotting for a while and eventually i saw how little money i got i said fuck it and left, I didnt return to work for a few days because i was pissed over my earnings, Later that year i fucking quit, My parents kept driving me to the workplace if i refused to go, I had severe agoraphobia and i felt insanely fucked, So much i wanna fucking die, On barely no sleep, Nothing i was used as a cog in the machine for minimal pay, And all the jobs now require 4+ years permits if i want good pay, I dont have that time because next year ill be 24 and ill be 28 at the end which will leave me as a man that would hit the wall anyway, Not that i havent before bc im ugly, I hit the wall as a baby.

I could somewhat blame my parents for this aswell for not fixing my uneven jew nose and not having me at an earlier age, My brother and sister turned out to come out fine, At this point i just want to lay down in a grave and die, They are further in life and have aleredy procreated, They were given the same advice "Confidence"

TBH, It takes alot of time to ingest the blackpill, Welcome to the forum gray.

I should note that I've had very similar experiences to you. I'm the same age, 23. I've been pseudo-blackpilled since highschool and was fully blackpilled in college. I've finally truly accepted inceldom after settling into my job.

 

[Lonelyus]

I should note that I've had very similar experiences to you. I'm the same age, 23. I've been pseudo-blackpilled since highschool and was fully blackpilled in college. I've finally truly accepted inceldom after settling into my job.

Its good to earn some money sometimes, Ignore the bs normies and just do your job, You can tell your boss if any coworker is annoying you and they are obligated by LAW to take care of it, Otherwise the job place can be SHUT DOWN. "Workers Rights"

 

[Intellectual]

Its good to earn some money sometimes, Ignore the bs normies and just do your job, You can tell your boss if any coworker is annoying you and they are obligated by LAW to take care of it, Otherwise the job place can be SHUT DOWN. "Workers Rights"

Absolutely based, but I pretty much just save my money, I need something to spend on.

 

[Lonelyus]

Absolutely based, but I pretty much just save my money, I need something to spend on.

Im looking out for a new fleshlight, Im thinking about making a doll carving a hole and putting it in there to pretend its a irl female, Then i will snippet a photo and use a scissor and some glue and glue it onto the face, It will be somewhat of a hot foid but just with a much stiffer body, It wont be a great expirience but atleast i can pretend,

 

[Intellectual]

Im looking out for a new fleshlight, Im thinking about making a doll carving a hole and putting it in there to pretend its a irl female, Then i will snippet a photo and use a scissor and some glue and glue it onto the face, It will be somewhat of a hot foid but just with a much stiffer body, It wont be a great expirience but atleast i can pretend,

That is an incredibly based idea.

 

[Lonelyus]

That is an incredibly based idea.

Yeah, Now i just have to browse Ebay for some good ones