With nothing to contribute in smaller posts, I have decided to make an essay about narcissist inceldom.
Keep in mind all I say here is non-professional so while it may include legitimate research, I am just as vulnerable as many to cognitive distortions and being fooled on the internet.
With that in mind, on to the post
The situation is that the world has become much harsher for younger narcissists. Along with society's usual expectations, narcicels may also have to deal with typical cognitive distortions, other mental health conditions, being easier to manipulate, and many more reasons. The expectation to have committed romantic relationships young in this day and age means that the fate of a narcissist is often either a shitty relationship with low/no intimacy meaning you don't get many of your need fulfilled (beyond sex, which I mean if that's the only thing you're going for then good for you ig) or worse (or better depending on where you stand on the first issue), you get no relationship.
In 2023, while we have a lot of information about dealing with another narcissist we don't have nearly as much dealing with our own narcissism. This can easily make you an enemy to many people who aren't unaware and traumatized (implying nothing really stands out about you, ofc). Also, modern inventions are almost a form of mental castration for anyone with NPD, let me go over one effect of a few of the (potentially) most damaging:
You may think: "Isn't this a positive thing". You are not entirely wrong. There is a reason these are such alluring coping mechanisms for any person who may need to cope for one reason or another, even if unhealthily. Just be aware that even for people without NPD, these are destructive tools. There's a reason these 3 are part of the average modern man stereotype (or the degenerate, point is that it is a known issue that isn't uncommon).
We also have the mentality in many countries where if you don't lose your virginity young that you are a loser (or something related). Because society only supports their victims and not narcissists themselves, this ensures that any narcissist who isn't decently high in interpersonal functioning (and can function OK in other areas as well) is kind of fucked in society, and not by any pussies. These young people are labelled as simple abusers who can just stop if they wanted to or a force which is almost evil. In reality, many are slaves to their mind and in 2023, slaves to the neurotypical order of society.
I have also seen people say that women often go to bad men and leave out good ones. First of all, keep in mind that damaged men will attract damaged women. These women can stay for reasons which can include fear of abandonment, subconsciously repeating childhood patterns, and many more. Also I have looked for narcissism and physical appearance; much of what I could find (even on Google Scholar) was mostly of narcissists paying more attention to physical appearance and/or body image modifications. The most I could get to 'narcissist = ultimate chad' is that narcissists have different eyebrows.
Fucking eyebrows.
If your eyebrows take you from chad to incel or even mid-tier/high-tier normie to incel, idk what to tell you.
Keep in mind all I say here is non-professional so while it may include legitimate research, I am just as vulnerable as many to cognitive distortions and being fooled on the internet.
With that in mind, on to the post
The situation is that the world has become much harsher for younger narcissists. Along with society's usual expectations, narcicels may also have to deal with typical cognitive distortions, other mental health conditions, being easier to manipulate, and many more reasons. The expectation to have committed romantic relationships young in this day and age means that the fate of a narcissist is often either a shitty relationship with low/no intimacy meaning you don't get many of your need fulfilled (beyond sex, which I mean if that's the only thing you're going for then good for you ig) or worse (or better depending on where you stand on the first issue), you get no relationship.
In 2023, while we have a lot of information about dealing with another narcissist we don't have nearly as much dealing with our own narcissism. This can easily make you an enemy to many people who aren't unaware and traumatized (implying nothing really stands out about you, ofc). Also, modern inventions are almost a form of mental castration for anyone with NPD, let me go over one effect of a few of the (potentially) most damaging:
- P*rn: Substitute for real intimacy, which can mean dependency and potentially even decay into a lazy wageslaver who lets p*rn define them.
- Social Media: Incentivizes staying inside, similar effect of encouraging being a corporate slave to mainstream social media companies.
- Video Games: Hijacks competitive aspect and need to be the best; maybe not a good example because some narcissists may report not doing something unless they know they are going to win
You may think: "Isn't this a positive thing". You are not entirely wrong. There is a reason these are such alluring coping mechanisms for any person who may need to cope for one reason or another, even if unhealthily. Just be aware that even for people without NPD, these are destructive tools. There's a reason these 3 are part of the average modern man stereotype (or the degenerate, point is that it is a known issue that isn't uncommon).
We also have the mentality in many countries where if you don't lose your virginity young that you are a loser (or something related). Because society only supports their victims and not narcissists themselves, this ensures that any narcissist who isn't decently high in interpersonal functioning (and can function OK in other areas as well) is kind of fucked in society, and not by any pussies. These young people are labelled as simple abusers who can just stop if they wanted to or a force which is almost evil. In reality, many are slaves to their mind and in 2023, slaves to the neurotypical order of society.
I have also seen people say that women often go to bad men and leave out good ones. First of all, keep in mind that damaged men will attract damaged women. These women can stay for reasons which can include fear of abandonment, subconsciously repeating childhood patterns, and many more. Also I have looked for narcissism and physical appearance; much of what I could find (even on Google Scholar) was mostly of narcissists paying more attention to physical appearance and/or body image modifications. The most I could get to 'narcissist = ultimate chad' is that narcissists have different eyebrows.
Fucking eyebrows.
If your eyebrows take you from chad to incel or even mid-tier/high-tier normie to incel, idk what to tell you.
