I haven't progressed in any way for 8years and I just sit around hoping that I'll find a way to get out of this life and never do. The days are stretching into each other and the years too. Why does the world feel so small, and so poor, and everyone so selfish that nobody would ever throw you a bone, and even family drag you down to your lowest because they need company in their misery, nobody lifts you up or gives you a way out in this world it seems.
What the fuck do I do, I can't get a job because of my criminal record and I don't even want a job because I would be starting 10 years late and that feels even more hopeless. Is it really, for real over for me now? I'm 27 and NEET and pretty much nobody in the world cares about me anymore. Am I a free man now? What do I do with this freedom? Should I give my life to some good cause like the fight in Palestine or something like Yemen or Mali. Tbh, those are the only things I can even see myself doing anymore. I don't see the girlfriend and the money and the success in my future anymore at all. Those were childhood pile dreams. I realise as an adult I'm just useless meat and I would rather be a useful useless meatbag and throw myself into the grinders that need me like any where they are resisting the Jews that made the system so difficult to rise up in.
Its not just me that is totally stuck in life no? Surely there is a real difference in the upward mobility of people nowadays? The Jews have amassed so much wealth they monopolise everything and selectively allow people of their choosing to rise up in the controlled markets. Or am I severely deluded and the world is as fair as it has ever been and I have lots of opportunity but my mental illness prevents me from realising it? People tell me to take medication but I don't feel mentally ill I just feel like I am surrounded by crushing poverty both money and the life essence of common sense and fraternity. I feel very alone and I don't see how this can have any good ending. If it was always going to be this hopeless I should have just worked a job since I was 16 and prayed every day.
Those are my thoughts after turning 27 yesterday. And this birthday was the shittest I ever had. It really was a stark reminder of the worthlessness of my life.
What the fuck do I do, I can't get a job because of my criminal record and I don't even want a job because I would be starting 10 years late and that feels even more hopeless. Is it really, for real over for me now? I'm 27 and NEET and pretty much nobody in the world cares about me anymore. Am I a free man now? What do I do with this freedom? Should I give my life to some good cause like the fight in Palestine or something like Yemen or Mali. Tbh, those are the only things I can even see myself doing anymore. I don't see the girlfriend and the money and the success in my future anymore at all. Those were childhood pile dreams. I realise as an adult I'm just useless meat and I would rather be a useful useless meatbag and throw myself into the grinders that need me like any where they are resisting the Jews that made the system so difficult to rise up in.
Its not just me that is totally stuck in life no? Surely there is a real difference in the upward mobility of people nowadays? The Jews have amassed so much wealth they monopolise everything and selectively allow people of their choosing to rise up in the controlled markets. Or am I severely deluded and the world is as fair as it has ever been and I have lots of opportunity but my mental illness prevents me from realising it? People tell me to take medication but I don't feel mentally ill I just feel like I am surrounded by crushing poverty both money and the life essence of common sense and fraternity. I feel very alone and I don't see how this can have any good ending. If it was always going to be this hopeless I should have just worked a job since I was 16 and prayed every day.
Those are my thoughts after turning 27 yesterday. And this birthday was the shittest I ever had. It really was a stark reminder of the worthlessness of my life.
