I was pretty blackpilled since I was a young kid but I had hope that once I turned 18 and hit the gym hard I would somehow become attractive and normal with a social life, friends, and a girlfriend, have a normal college life, and so on. Get married, have a good job, make my parents proud, that shit would all somehow work out and I was just in a terrible phase and I could get surgeries or muscle or what not.
Last month I realized that none of that would ever happen. It hit me all at once in one day, that I'd been deluding myself for years. I was up at 3 AM and it just hit me all at once. I drank all the liquor I could find and got in my car and started FLOORING IT down the empty 3 AM roads. Running every light, stomping the gas pedal, blasting an old Linkin Park song. It's a miracle I didn't die.
The concept of "the black pill" is flawed. There's no singular revelation, it's not one black pill, it's an unending course. Like antibiotics.
So you get addicted to your little bottle of black pills and can't stop taking them. You go down the rabbit hole.
Somewhere along the line, you learn terrible things about...basically everything. There aren't "happy" black pills. This can very easily poison you against the world, AND, on top of this, you can't talk yourself out of it or "just be happy" or "not care" or "ignore it"... Because it's the truth, and you're proven it. You know it.
Your need misanthropic beliefs are based on solid reasoning, logic, and proven fact.
Your worldview grows darker, but to your horror, for more accurate.
And suddenly, you don't like people so much.
Suddenly, you don't see so much good in them.
Suddenly, you have to start hiding your beliefs.
Suddenly, you have nothing in common with "normalfags."
Suddenly, any extroversion you had left dies along with your faith in society.
And then you think you hate the world and everything in it. You stop caring. At least... You try to.
Then you realize, it's not you that's wrong, it's the world. It's over.
You're here forever.
Last month I realized that none of that would ever happen. It hit me all at once in one day, that I'd been deluding myself for years. I was up at 3 AM and it just hit me all at once. I drank all the liquor I could find and got in my car and started FLOORING IT down the empty 3 AM roads. Running every light, stomping the gas pedal, blasting an old Linkin Park song. It's a miracle I didn't die.
The concept of "the black pill" is flawed. There's no singular revelation, it's not one black pill, it's an unending course. Like antibiotics.
So you get addicted to your little bottle of black pills and can't stop taking them. You go down the rabbit hole.
Somewhere along the line, you learn terrible things about...basically everything. There aren't "happy" black pills. This can very easily poison you against the world, AND, on top of this, you can't talk yourself out of it or "just be happy" or "not care" or "ignore it"... Because it's the truth, and you're proven it. You know it.
Your need misanthropic beliefs are based on solid reasoning, logic, and proven fact.
Your worldview grows darker, but to your horror, for more accurate.
And suddenly, you don't like people so much.
Suddenly, you don't see so much good in them.
Suddenly, you have to start hiding your beliefs.
Suddenly, you have nothing in common with "normalfags."
Suddenly, any extroversion you had left dies along with your faith in society.
And then you think you hate the world and everything in it. You stop caring. At least... You try to.
Then you realize, it's not you that's wrong, it's the world. It's over.
You're here forever.
