Raper
Lonely virgin
★★★★★
- Joined
- Mar 20, 2018
- Posts
- 432
It might be fake then.That top comment is absolutely terrible for a place devoted to therapy. It assumes a lot of traits of the person just because of the group that they identify with. You aren't supposed to assume negative shit about patients, wtf.
Probably my therapist
Albert Ellis was an American psychologist who in 1955 developed Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT).
View attachment 5389
No matter how anxious I was, whenever I saw a woman sitting alone on a park bench, I immediately—no debate!—sat next to her on the bench. I allowed no excuses as to how she looked, how old she was, whether she was tall or short, and so on. No excuses! I just forced myself, very uncomfortably, to sit next to her, whereupon, immediately, many of the women I sat next to quickly got up and walked away. All told, I think I approached and sat next to 130 women that month of August. Thirty, or almost a third of them, immediately walked away. Very discouraging! But that left me with an even hundred who still stayed—which was good for research purposes!
Not at all daunted, I spoke to the remaining hundred women just as I had planned to do. I spoke about the flowers, the trees, the weather, the birds, the bees, the book or paper they were reading—anything, just to make conversation. Nothing brilliant or clever. Nothing personal. No remarks about their looks or anything else that might make them afraid of me and make them turn away or leave. Just one hundred ordinary statements.
Well, the hundred women did speak back to me, some very briefly, some for an hour or more. I soon got many of them in animated conversation. When they seemed willing, I asked them about their work, their families, their living arrangements, their hobbies, interests, and so forth. Regular conversations, just as I would have had if I had been formally introduced to them.
As for my primary purpose in talking to them—to ask for a date, see them regularly, go to bed with them, and perhaps marry one of them—I got absolutely nowhere. Nowhere at all. For out of the hundred women I talked with, I was able to make only one date—and she didn’t show up for it! She talked with me for two hours, kissed me goodbye when she left, and agreed to meet me later in the park for a date that night. But she never showed up. And, foolishly, I neglected to ask for her phone number, so I never saw her again. How tragic! How disappointing! But I still survived. And thereafter, I always asked for the phone number of the women I met and dated!
Within that month of getting rejected by a hundred women, I completely lost my social anxiety and, especially, my fear of encountering strange women in strange places. For I saw, cognitively, that nothing terrible happened as a result of my rejections. None of the women I talked to took out a knife and cut my penis off. None of them vomited and ran away. None of them called a cop. No, no terrible thing, which I had so often imagined would happen, actually occurred. Instead, I had many pleasant conversations with these women, enjoyed having them, learned a great deal about women that I had not previously known, got increasingly less uncomfortable and afraid to talk to them, and had several other fortunate results. Best of all, I almost immediately got over my fear of approaching women, and for the rest of my life I have been able to speak to and try to date literally hundreds of them whenever I chance to meet them in parks, on trains, at airports, and other public places. I now have no fear of doing so, and even though I normally get rejected for sex, love, and marriage by the vast majority of them, my social anxiety has gone for good. Nothing ventured, nothing gained! My fear of doing poorly with women and being rejected was gone!
I agree.It's not too bad of an echo chamber here. I observe lots of different views and disagreements