I am honestly stuck here.
Everything I do in this society will not earn me fucking acceptance, Dumbass humans will still treat me like shit and bully my ass no matter where I go.
Jobs and Money are next are next to fucking pointless, If I am dead, What do I have left? All the fucking money in the world is meaningless if in the end, you are just going to die and have it All taken away from your dead corpse and given to some other fool.
No amount of money, Career, items, is going to fix this.
I just have to laugh at how people can actual put so much fucking value into materialistic things, They value their Money, Shoes, House, Phones, and other shit so much. but don't realize that all of this shit is inflicted by impermance.
I have lost my True family, My dumbass mother is an alcoholic scumbag whore, my father disowned me. Aunt died of Cancer. I have no Woman that will desire me or want me. My "Friends", either moved away, In Jail, or Died
Sooner or later my Mom will be fucking Gone. It is next to impossible to make anything remotely close to what Old friends were, Every normie has formed their Cliques, and I am the odd one out.
The Point of me saying this is:
Family and Friends are Impermanent.
What purposes do "Goals" and "Career" serve then? What good does working in IT get you when you are alone?
My Black Autistic-ass will not be recognized as a human being in this Society. Any contributions I might add to this Society will just be swepted under the rug, trampled on, and Forgotten in the depths of history.
One day my ass will die Alone, With no one to even bat a fucking eye, No one will even check to see if I am dead, Only to be discovered years later when the either Taxes aren't paid off or when the House is looking like the Projects.
How can one hope to plan for the future knowing that their efforts and work will ultimately, be rendered meaningless upon death?
Everything I do in this society will not earn me fucking acceptance, Dumbass humans will still treat me like shit and bully my ass no matter where I go.
Jobs and Money are next are next to fucking pointless, If I am dead, What do I have left? All the fucking money in the world is meaningless if in the end, you are just going to die and have it All taken away from your dead corpse and given to some other fool.
No amount of money, Career, items, is going to fix this.
I just have to laugh at how people can actual put so much fucking value into materialistic things, They value their Money, Shoes, House, Phones, and other shit so much. but don't realize that all of this shit is inflicted by impermance.
I have lost my True family, My dumbass mother is an alcoholic scumbag whore, my father disowned me. Aunt died of Cancer. I have no Woman that will desire me or want me. My "Friends", either moved away, In Jail, or Died
Sooner or later my Mom will be fucking Gone. It is next to impossible to make anything remotely close to what Old friends were, Every normie has formed their Cliques, and I am the odd one out.
The Point of me saying this is:
Family and Friends are Impermanent.
What purposes do "Goals" and "Career" serve then? What good does working in IT get you when you are alone?
My Black Autistic-ass will not be recognized as a human being in this Society. Any contributions I might add to this Society will just be swepted under the rug, trampled on, and Forgotten in the depths of history.
One day my ass will die Alone, With no one to even bat a fucking eye, No one will even check to see if I am dead, Only to be discovered years later when the either Taxes aren't paid off or when the House is looking like the Projects.
How can one hope to plan for the future knowing that their efforts and work will ultimately, be rendered meaningless upon death?
