What I really want in life is to find something that I can work on every day, to look back in 10 years and say "I can't believe how far I've come".

[Deleted member 7448]

So basically I want to find something to create. But seeing as I have no interests or a passion, it's pretty hard to find such a thing.

Examples of things that have could fit this need of mine but that won't work for me:

1. Youtube/twitch channel or something like that - not for me. I'm very shy. Not towards strangers, I don't mind if a million strangers hear my voice and such, but I live with my parents and for some reason I'm terrified of anybody irl seeing me do ... anything. I can't even play music if anybody hears me, like my parents, even though they even bought me a guitar, paid for lessons, I just couldn't play if anybody near me hears me. And yet weirdly I wouldn't care if the entire internet saw me.

2. Programming apps or games or something - my brain is too ADD and lazy for this. And quite forgetful too. I tried getting into programming several times, and I always quit very quickly cause I just get too distracted, bored and I just can't focus for shit.

3. Running a game server, like a Minecraft server or some shit - way past its prime, the wild west/gold rush of this kind of thing was years ago. Also requires some programming language, investing actual money etc...

4. Writing - I might have aspergers or autism or something, so I express myself in odd ways. I use odd words and combinations of words and such. So I can't be a writer, I make these mistakes without even realizing, it's just so ingrained in my way of thinking. I can see people irl sort of pause for a second to think if what I said was retarded or I'm just too brilliant and they didn't understand, that's how odd I seem to speak sometimes. Too bad I'm just retarded.

5. Drawing - a chicken with a pencil up its ass could draw better than me. Even in kindergarten/school I was the worst at this kind of shit.

And that's all my brain can think of. God damn I lack imagination, I can't think of anything. I've searched for something to fulfill this need for years and I can't find it. It would have to be something that I can do indoors cause I hate leaving my room. So no gardening or woodworking or shit like that. God damn I'm a retard, I'll never find the answer for my soul's yearning.

 

[Deleted member 21768]

Read the title and my mind first went to competing with myself to see how far my cum would shoot out to try and to get farther than I did last time. Seeing that might be my only accomplishment in my life. I got a Youtube that I might never use

 

[Studiocel]

Look into hobbies you can work on alone. I got into music production and its a pretty good cope. You can work on songs alone in your room and all you need is a computer and pirated software.

 

[Mainländer]

Mogs me. I just want sex and romance (didn't want to want it of course), surviving with the minimalest effort possible and playing music. Music is not even a long term goal for me, I just happen to write new songs and think "I like this one, I want to share it with the world." It comes naturally.

 

[Deleted member 7448]

Mogs me. I just want sex and romance (didn't want to want it of course), surviving with the minimalest effort possible and playing music. Music is not even a long term goal for me, I just happen to write new songs and think "I like this one, I want to share it with the world." It comes naturally.

Well, I say I want that, but I'm too lazy to actually do it I think. Maybe that's why I haven't found the activity I'm searching for yet, it just doesn't exist cause I'm too lazy for everything, so I sort of want the benefits of working on something while also feeling as comfy as laying in bed rotting.

 

[Deleted member 29001]

What about animation? SFM is a good place to start. There are official tutorials on youtube too.

 

[Total Imbecile]

Damn I was going to suggest 2 but I get youre not a fit

The thing is you need a gf to stick with anything

I used to program at like 12-13, Id mostly make just dump little programs or games but then I just kind of stopped at 14 and started LDARmaxxing

You could also hit the gym, I was so happy after doing my first pullup after 3 months of work, its slow but its nice also makes you feel better about yourself

 

[Incline]

So basically I want to find something to create. But seeing as I have no interests or a passion, it's pretty hard to find such a thing.

Examples of things that have could fit this need of mine but that won't work for me:

1. Youtube/twitch channel or something like that - not for me. I'm very shy. Not towards strangers, I don't mind if a million strangers hear my voice and such, but I live with my parents and for some reason I'm terrified of anybody irl seeing me do ... anything. I can't even play music if anybody hears me, like my parents, even though they even bought me a guitar, paid for lessons, I just couldn't play if anybody near me hears me. And yet weirdly I wouldn't care if the entire internet saw me.

2. Programming apps or games or something - my brain is too ADD and lazy for this. And quite forgetful too. I tried getting into programming several times, and I always quit very quickly cause I just get too distracted, bored and I just can't focus for shit.

3. Running a game server, like a Minecraft server or some shit - way past its prime, the wild west/gold rush of this kind of thing was years ago. Also requires some programming language, investing actual money etc...

4. Writing - I might have aspergers or autism or something, so I express myself in odd ways. I use odd words and combinations of words and such. So I can't be a writer, I make these mistakes without even realizing, it's just so ingrained in my way of thinking. I can see people irl sort of pause for a second to think if what I said was retarded or I'm just too brilliant and they didn't understand, that's how odd I seem to speak sometimes. Too bad I'm just retarded.

5. Drawing - a chicken with a pencil up its ass could draw better than me. Even in kindergarten/school I was the worst at this kind of shit.

And that's all my brain can think of. God damn I lack imagination, I can't think of anything. I've searched for something to fulfill this need for years and I can't find it. It would have to be something that I can do indoors cause I hate leaving my room. So no gardening or woodworking or shit like that. God damn I'm a retard, I'll never find the answer for my soul's yearning.

Same boyo. Maybe try video editing it's a nice cope I do it sometimes. The last video I uploaded on youtube was removed by the jews though so I kind of lost motivation to be uploading more videos. I uploaded it here instead.


View: https://vimeo.com/347399542

 

[Deleted member 27495]

the thing is no one will ever care how far you come and eventually the loneliness catches up to you. even if you were popular on twitch or ran a successful game server, still, no one will give a single shit about you.

It all loops back around. Life alone is a miserable hell no matter how much money you have

 

[Deleted member 7448]

the thing is no one will ever care how far you come and eventually the loneliness catches up to you. even if you were popular on twitch or ran a successful game server, still, no one will give a single shit about you.

It all loops back around. Life alone is a miserable hell no matter how much money you have

Would be so much better with money though. Money would fix 90% of my problems, though money isn't of much use if you spend too much of your time and energy getting it.

 

[Deleted member 27495]

Would be so much better with money though. Money would fix 90% of my problems, though money isn't of much use if you spend too much of your time and energy getting it.

you dont get it. It doesnt matter where you put yourself, if ur a socially inept autistic like me even money cannot compensate. Having prospects as an incel is retarded. Money doesnt solve shit

 

[Deleted member 7448]

you dont get it. It doesnt matter where you put yourself, if ur a socially inept autistic like me even money cannot compensate. Having prospects as an incel is retarded. Money doesnt solve shit

Nah, I heard this rhetoric a million times before. I've contemplated this from every angle a million times, money would make my life great (as long as my parents/cat are healthy and I also have a lot of free time/energy). What you don't understand is that I have a personality disorder, an avoidant personality, in addition to all kinds of things like autism. I've spent my entire life alone, even seeking to be alone. Money would just make it perfect.

The conversation is moot though, I live in a shitty country with shitty salaries, on top of being the laziest man alive. Money isn't something I should even think about.

 

[Deleted member 27495]

Nah, I heard this rhetoric before. I've evaluated the situation, money would make my life great (as long as my parents/cat are healthy and I also have a lot of free time/energy). What you don't understand is that I have a personality disorder, an avoidant personality, in addition to all kinds of things like autism. I've spent my entire life alone, even seeking to be alone. Money would just make it perfect.

My point being, since money isnt going to make you not alone, then what's the point in doing anything.

 

[Deleted member 7448]

My point being, since money isnt going to make you not alone, then what's the point in doing anything.

I see your misunderstanding. You see, I'm on this forum to vent and bitch about my life, that's true. But I'm here to do that because it's a community of people more or less like me, with based people who aren't soys. The misunderstanding is that you think that being alone and sexless/loveless is my main problem, when it's not. It is a big problem, don't get me wrong, but if I had to rank it I'd put it last. I'd much rather have money, or fulfillment from being good at something and creating something. Combine that with free time + the ability to purchase certain things that can artificially elevate my mood, then I'd consider that my perfect life, even if I'd remain a loveless solitary virgin for the rest of my life. Alas, it's all moot. It's my dream precisely because it may never happen. Even in this country where the average wages are less than $300 a month, a hard-working person can get ahead and make money and all that. But my main flaw is my debilitating, almost pathological laziness. So I will never have money, and I don't even want money if it means working too hard and wasting my limited energy. In conclusion, fuck my life I'd rather die of an aneurysm tonight than live to see tomorrow. And yet tomorrow I shall wake again.

 

[insanus virginem]

I don't know what to tell you. I tried most of the things mentioned above and failed at them because I realized I could not make a career out of it in a foreseeable future. If you want to be great at something it takes about half a decade or more so starting in your teenage years is a must.

Maybe consider 3D modeling if programming seems too hard for you. It's far less talent based than 2d art.