LifeFuel Titfucking is our last hope and our salvation

[Pitar62]

So I kept thinking of ways to lose my virginity. No luck with girls, so escorts were the obvious solution. But hold on, you get sexual diseases from them. Having sex with prostitues is a death sentence, right? You'll die in 5-10 years max. Even if you use a condom, it can still break. Plus, condoms are very uncomfortable and they suck.

Here's my solution: negotiate with an escort and only ask to titfuck her. That's right, just fuck escorts between their breasts. No risk of diseases, no need to touch places that were fucked by hundreds of people. Titfucking is 100% safe, your dick doesn't go in any hole (unlike oral sex where you still get STD's).

"BuT tItFuCkiNg IsN't EnOuGh To CuM" - wrong. If you're a virgin like me, we'd probably cum only if a girl touches our dick. And if you can't cum from titfucking, you can ask her to finish you with a handjob.

This is lifefuel for me, can't wait to fuck some huge tits, good luck boys

 

[Deleted member 21768]

Yeah. No. I might as well stick my dick between two balloons.

 

[Pitar62]

Yeah. No. I might as well stick my dick between two balloons.

Balloons turn you on mate?

 

[Fat Link]

Based post.

Very reasonable counter solution to the STD problem.

With that said however like everything else in life actual sex involves a little or even a lot of "risk".

Yet a person doesn't have to "go in blind", heh.

All you have to do to avoid most deadly or annoying sexually transmitted diseases is of course wear condoms but also go to your doctor regularly to make sure you haven't contracted anything as well for any of their extra advice on the best sexual practices possible to avoid STD's.

You can get on Prep a.k.a Truvada to avoid contracting HIV.

Hepatitis C is cureable these days.

Syphilis and Chlymidia can both be cured with antibiotics, etc, etc.
(Though for Syphilis at least early detection is key to the cure. Let it get to later stages and you're fucked basically)

So you can get your actual "fuckee fuckee" on as the chinks from Full Metal Jacket might say but you have to be "ontop of your health" heh, to be your absolute most safest while doing so.

Most niggers and related lazy and or irresponsible individuals can't be bothered to do this though and so will end up in the ICU before long choking out their last breath wishing they'd been more responsible when it comes to their sexual health.

Its not difficult to get regular blood tests and have doctors examine your balls and or prick for lesions/diseases but admittedly it IS annoying and sure the anticipation of getting test results can be anxiety inducing and FRIGHTENING but you have to do it if you want to maximize the amount of both fun and life you'll get to live on this foul earth.

 

[Tenshi]

 

[Mainländer]

Having sex with prostitues is a death sentence, right? You'll die in 5-10 years max.

I'm still alive and never got anything. You just need to be smart about it. Or even much better, not do it.

 

[Deleted member 21768]

Balloons turn you on mate?

No, but I'm not paying someone for sex and not get sex.

 

[RemoveNormalfags]

If you're a virgin like me, we'd probably cum only if a girl touches our dick.

I'd even cum if a girl accidentally touches my back.

 

[Dregster]

Massive Cope

 

[Deleted member 30682]

Good luck finding a hooker with big tits and willing to get a load of incel cum on the face

 

[Copexodius Maximus]

Cope, normal whores also have disease ridden vaginas as well.

 

[Pitar62]

Cope, normal whores also have disease ridden vaginas as well.

I mean I wouldn't know

Good luck finding a hooker with big tits and willing to get a load of incel cum on the face

She'd most likely prefer getting titfucked rather than doing a blowjob/vaginal sex. That's the whole thing about hookers, they don't care about looks

 

[BlkPillPres]

So I kept thinking of ways to lose my virginity. No luck with girls, so escorts were the obvious solution. But hold on, you get sexual diseases from them. Having sex with prostitues is a death sentence, right? You'll die in 5-10 years max. Even if you use a condom, it can still break. Plus, condoms are very uncomfortable and they suck.

Here's my solution: negotiate with an escort and only ask to titfuck her. That's right, just fuck escorts between their breasts. No risk of diseases, no need to touch places that were fucked by hundreds of people. Titfucking is 100% safe, your dick doesn't go in any hole (unlike oral sex where you still get STD's).

"BuT tItFuCkiNg IsN't EnOuGh To CuM" - wrong. If you're a virgin like me, we'd probably cum only if a girl touches our dick. And if you can't cum from titfucking, you can ask her to finish you with a handjob.

This is lifefuel for me, can't wait to fuck some huge tits, good luck boys

Nobody is fucking wealthmaxxing just to fuck tits, if you die in 5-10 years then you had an amazing 5-10 years you'd never had gotten without taking risks to begin with

 

[grondilu]

From my experience, prostitutes with big and beautiful tits are fairly rare (my guess is having nice boobs gives them such a high SMV that there are many things they can do before resorting to prostitution).

But if you're afraid of STDs, handjobs are actually very nice. Much better than when you do it to yourself.

 

[Pitar62]

But if you're afraid of STDs, handjobs are actually very nice. Much better than when you do it to yourself.

Great suggestion. I'll definitely get a handjob if I won't find an escort with nice tits.

 

[BlkPillPres]

From my experience, prostitutes with big and beautiful tits are fairly rare.

But if you're afraid of STDs, handjobs are actually very nice. Much better than when you do it to yourself.

Great suggestion. I'll definitely get a handjob if I won't find an escort with nice tits.

Dude if you literally just pay a bitch to stroke you off with her hands, you can just save money and buy a fleshlight. It will be way softer and feel way better on your dick (with water based lube) than a woman's hand

@Pitar62
You guys aren't trying to "escortcel" you are trying to "egocel" lol

You aren't PAYING FOR SEX

You are paying for A WOMAN TO PERFORM A "SEX ACT" ON YOU

In other words you don't even really care about getting to have sex (you know, ACTUAL sex, the thing you missed out on in life) and enjoy it to the fullest. Its just about a woman being intimate with you, that's why you're paying, else why would you pay just to stick to only tits and handjobs

What you guys are suggesting is ridiculous, just stay out of the prostitution world lol, you are wasting your time because you are just half assing the experience. If you aren't willing to take risks then don't bother, get a fleshlight and use water based lube, it will feel way better than tits or a handjob and you won't have to pay everytime

If you're a virgin like me, we'd probably cum only if a girl touches our dick. And if you can't cum from titfucking, you can ask her to finish you with a handjob.

You have to be stupid if you think that isn't going to get boring quick

Can you watch your favorite TV series over and over and never get bored?, rinse and repeat over and over and then over again?

 

[grondilu]

Dude if you literally just pay a bitch to stroke you off with her hands, you can just save money and buy a fleshlight. It will be way softer and feel way better on your dick (with water based lube) than a woman's hand

Non-sense. When you don't have to move you can relax, enjoy the view and caress the body of the female, including her ass. I've never used a fleshlight so I can't compare, but I very much doubt that it's anywhere near as good as a beautiful woman stroking your dick while you caress her ass or fondle her tits.

Also as I said before, when you do it yourself it's just not the same, there has to be something similar as with tickling going on here (you can't tickle yourself). Self-stimulation is just not the same as external stimulation.

You have to be stupid if you think that isn't going to get boring quick

Well that is true, the full service is better in the end, but newbies should not overlook handjobs especially if they're afraid of STDs.

 

[Pitar62]

Non-sense. When you don't have to move you can relax, enjoy the view and caress the body of the female, including her ass. I've never used a fleshlight so I can't compare, but I very much doubt that it's anywhere near as good as a beautiful woman stroking your dick while you caress her ass or fondle her tits.

Also as I said before, when you do it yourself it's just not the same, there has to be something similar as with tickling going on here (you can't tickle yourself). Self-stimulation is just not the same as external stimulation.


Well that is true, the full service is better in the end.

Thanks for writing it out for me. I wanted to reply but it was too hard to explain.

 

[solblue]

I agree. Prostitutes also wash their tits when showering whereas they rarely, if ever, properly clean their orifices.

 

[Reprobus]

Yeah. No. I might as well stick my dick between two balloons.

 

[TheNEET]

no sleepover = no ascension

 

[crestfallencel]

rare greycel of culture post

 

[TINMAN]

Balloons turn you on mate?

View: https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=B4XzOWi5c4s

 

[Rambocel]

Celestial level cope thread. That's not losing your virginity. Only D -> V is losing your virginity. I'm on the fence as to whether anal counts or not. Most foids are going to be less likely to agree to that anyway though.

 

[ThoughtfulCel]

No thanks, ill just stick to rapemaxxing.

 

[Pitar62]

Celestial level cope thread. That's not losing your virginity. Only D -> V is losing your virginity. I'm on the fence as to whether anal counts or not. Most foids are going to be less likely to agree tot hat anyway though.

My bad, I worded it badly. I don't care about my virginity, shooting my load between a pair of tits would be pretty nice for an incel.

 

[BlkPillPres]

including her ass. I've never used a fleshlight so I can't compare, but I very much doubt that it's anywhere near as good as a beautiful woman stroking your dick while you caress her ass or fondle her tits.

IDK that just seems like a waste of time for me, I've held tits, they are soft and nice, but its not gonna be even close to vaginal, and I'm sure anal is way better.

If you go into prostitution with that mindset there's no point in doing it, you are cheating yourself out of pleasure, which is what you are paying for, I'm not going to a whore to just touch tits and ass, I'm going to fuck.

My bad, I worded it badly. I don't care about my virginity, shooting my load between a pair of tits would be pretty nice for an incel.

If your hands are getting more action than your dick with a prostitute, you are doing it wrong lol

@grondilu @Pitar62
If I ever thought a woman was so diseased that if I stuck my dick in her I'd get something I wouldn't even want a handjob from her, its like saying you have one of those Rubbermaid bowls with two separate compartments, one has shit in it the other has your favorite food, and your logic is "I'll just eat carefully and avoid the shit"

That just doesn't make sense to me, its like if a food item falls on the ground and you pick it up and bite the side that was facing up, just throw it away if you don't trust consuming the entire thing, same applies to sex, there's no point in bothering

I likely wouldn't be able to enjoy it, because i'd be wondering why I'm risking it with this disease ridden bitch

I'm either trusting that a whore is clean or not, I'm not playing the what if game

 

[Pitar62]

I likely wouldn't be able to enjoy it

Then why are you speaking for others? I really would enjoy it

 

[BlkPillPres]

I really would enjoy it

Yeah you would, for a year at most, then it will get boring and you'll want to do more. You really think you are going to spend years fondling ass and catching vag out the side of your eye, and you will just keep enjoying handjobs and titjobs?

By that logic, why don't you just stick to porn, why isn't porn good enough for you anymore?

You don't seem to get it, the more you experience something, the more you want to do that thing, porn lead to me paying for sex, you are joking if you think tit jobs aren't going to lead to you trying anal one day, you will do it, you won't be able to resist, and the older you get the less you will care about stds or anything because you'll start to realize you are going to die soon anyways

But go ahead and keep believing that a titjob is going to be enough, I mean if you said blow jobs I'd still call bs but at least that would be more believable

 

[Pitar62]

Yeah you would, for a year at most, then it will get boring and you'll want to do more. You really think you are going to spend years fondling ass and catching vag out the side of your eye, and you will just keep enjoying handjobs and titjobs?

By that logic, why don't you just stick to porn, why isn't porn good enough for you anymore?

You don't seem to get it, the more you experience something, the more you want to do that thing, porn lead to me paying for sex, you are joking if you think tit jobs aren't going to lead to you trying anal one day, you will do it, you won't be able to resist, and the older you get the less you will care about stds or anything because you'll start to realize you are going to die soon anyways

But go ahead and keep believing that a titjob is going to be enough, I mean if you said blow jobs I'd still call bs but at least that would be more believable

This is so biased. What about you? Doesn't normal sex get boring as well? Doesn't it make you wanna do more and more? By your logic, you'll become a BDSM addict that can't get off if the woman isn't beat up and shit. Or another type of degenerate who likes shit and piss during sex. Why do handjobs and titjobs get boring, but penis-in-vagina doesn't?

 

[BlkPillPres]

This is so biased. What about you? Doesn't normal sex get boring as well? Doesn't it make you wanna do more and more? By your logic, you'll become a BDSM addict that can't get off if the woman isn't beat up and shit. Or another type of degenerate who likes shit and piss during sex.

False analogy, that isn't more of the "same thing", its the addition of entirely new fetishes

The argument isn't "you'll want to do something different BECAUSE ITS DIFFERENT"

The argument is "you'll want to do WHAT YOU BODY ACTUALLY INTENDS FOR YOU TO DO (HAVE PENETRATIVE SEX)"

You really think after years of watching porn, watching other men do it, you won't wan to do it too?

You think you'll just be fine looking at and forever missing out on what you always wanted to experience but never could (due to rejection), when all you have to do is ask and hand over a few extra dollars?

Why do handjobs and titjobs get boring, but penis-in-vagina doesn't?

1. Your entire libido revolves around penis-in-vagina, if not for penis-in-vagina you wouldn't want to have sex. When you get a tit job, your brain (as in your brain itself, your biological imperatives) isn't thinking "titjob" your brain is thinking "vagina". When you ejaculate from masturbation your brain isn't thinking "masturbation" its thinking you are actually having sex and impregnating a female

Deep down you are always going to crave vaginal sex because its the be all end all of sex, its literally what sex is about, you can't replace a vagina, I haven't even fucked a really tight one and I can say that, when I fuck an actual tight petite bitch I'll probably be hooked

2. Please dude, at least say blowjobs, are you seriously confused as to why bare flesh isn't going to be as satisfying as fucking a warm wet orifice that envelopes your entire penis (especially the glans) tightening around it and pulling

A blow job at least simulates a vagina, a hand and some lube doesn't even come close

 

[Deleted member 5712]

For a second i was giddy because i thought you were a clever bastard and finally solved my std whore problem but then i realized two things
1) i browse escort sites a lot and its rare for a hooker to have juicy huge voluptuous tits that are made for titfucking
2) i have a small dick so cant properly titfuck any girl

now im sad AF
thanks for nothing op

 

[StSausageCel]

Tbh I'd much rather place my dick in between some thick ass cheeks and go to town. An assjob would turn me on much more than titfucking.

 

[Neggr]

u still would pay the foid, not worth it

 

[your personality]

View attachment 377699

Dude if you literally just pay a bitch to stroke you off with her hands, you can just save money and buy a fleshlight. It will be way softer and feel way better on your dick (with water based lube) than a woman's hand

@Pitar62
You guys aren't trying to "escortcel" you are trying to "egocel" lol

You aren't PAYING FOR SEX

You are paying for A WOMAN TO PERFORM A "SEX ACT" ON YOU

In other words you don't even really care about getting to have sex (you know, ACTUAL sex, the thing you missed out on in life) and enjoy it to the fullest. Its just about a woman being intimate with you, that's why you're paying, else why would you pay just to stick to only tits and handjobs

What you guys are suggesting is ridiculous, just stay out of the prostitution world lol, you are wasting your time because you are just half assing the experience. If you aren't willing to take risks then don't bother, get a fleshlight and use water based lube, it will feel way better than tits or a handjob and you won't have to pay everytime

Facts.
Fleshlight and tenga egg is the way to go if you are trying to get an enhanced cooming experience. Giving money to a prostitute and not having sex with her is cucked.

False analogy, that isn't more of the "same thing", its the addition of entirely new fetishes

The argument isn't "you'll want to do something different BECAUSE ITS DIFFERENT"

The argument is "you'll want to do WHAT YOU BODY ACTUALLY INTENDS FOR YOU TO DO (HAVE PENETRATIVE SEX)"

You really think after years of watching porn, watching other men do it, you won't wan to do it too?

You think you'll just be fine looking at and forever missing out on what you always wanted to experience but never could (due to rejection), when all you have to do is ask and hand over a few extra dollars?



1. Your entire libido revolves around penis-in-vagina, if not for penis-in-vagina you wouldn't want to have sex. When you get a tit job, your brain (as in your brain itself, your biological imperatives) isn't thinking "titjob" your brain is thinking "vagina". When you ejaculate from masturbation your brain isn't thinking "masturbation" its thinking you are actually having sex and impregnating a female

Deep down you are always going to crave vaginal sex because its the be all end all of sex, its literally what sex is about, you can't replace a vagina, I haven't even fucked a really tight one and I can say that, when I fuck an actual tight petite bitch I'll probably be hooked

2. Please dude, at least say blowjobs, are you seriously confused as to why bare flesh isn't going to be as satisfying as fucking a warm wet orifice that envelopes your entire penis (especially the glans) tightening around it and pulling

A blow job at least simulates a vagina, a hand and some lube doesn't even come close

Having a whore do sexual acts on you putting stopping short of having penetrative sex with her is just essentially paying for a female to give you blue balls jfl.

 

[dirtykombatcel]

look at where this situation has come.

 

[LitVirgin]

Titty fucking should last no more than 4 min at most nobody wants to be rubbing bare skin until you finally finish.

 

[BlkPillPres]

Facts.
Fleshlight and tenga egg is the way to go if you are trying to get an enhanced cooming experience. Giving money to a prostitute and not having sex with her is cucked.

You are basically cucking yourself lol, and you are making her job easy and giving her money, when I'm done a bitch has to be sweating lol

Having a whore do sexual acts on you putting stopping short of having penetrative sex with her is just essentially paying for a female to give you blue balls jfl.

I really can't wrap my head around it tbh, its like paying a whore to do what wives in cuck open relationships do to their husbands, play these weird "you don't get to put it inside" sex games. Paying for anything but penetrative sex is like paying to temporarily be in an open relationship

 

[Tenshi]

look at where this situation has come.

kek

 

[Deleted member 6214]

no sleepover = no ascension

 

[ordinaryotaku]

Good idea for escortcels, tbhlossus.