black_depresso
You won't change reality, friend
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- Joined
- Jun 13, 2019
- Posts
- 818
I was thinking today I actually am so drained from watching faceandlms' videos, living life, living the experience of ugliness and everything associated with it, and facing all the negative consequences of ugliness I've grown so accustomed to over my 24 years of life
and I felt this moment of
Being so close to abandoning it altogether, the impending sexual urges to fuck and masturbate and jizz and watch porn, Im feeling like im uncontrollably reverting from that sexual state to an asexual state of wisdom, where I can pursue meaningful things, knowledge, skills, hobbies, for no other reason than the personal pleasure I can gain from developing myself as a person
I feel like im gradually detaching sexuality from my lived experience, and socialisation too, I no longer feel a need to be with and around people. I just dont care about anyone anymore, and dont care to make friends either. Today I felt incredible quietude and peace within myself, that I am heading towards ultimate, monk-like liberation of my mind to live with the purest experiences of the human condition, away from sexual incapacitation and obsession.
and I felt this moment of
Being so close to abandoning it altogether, the impending sexual urges to fuck and masturbate and jizz and watch porn, Im feeling like im uncontrollably reverting from that sexual state to an asexual state of wisdom, where I can pursue meaningful things, knowledge, skills, hobbies, for no other reason than the personal pleasure I can gain from developing myself as a person
I feel like im gradually detaching sexuality from my lived experience, and socialisation too, I no longer feel a need to be with and around people. I just dont care about anyone anymore, and dont care to make friends either. Today I felt incredible quietude and peace within myself, that I am heading towards ultimate, monk-like liberation of my mind to live with the purest experiences of the human condition, away from sexual incapacitation and obsession.