TheJester
King of Jestermaxxed
★★★
- Joined
- May 17, 2024
- Posts
- 2,789
Heres a story from the time I was in 5th Grade: Our Biology teacher was playing a game "Start with a big Animal and then go lower and asked another student to name a even smaller animal "Everyone in my class knew already I had an extremly weird hobby that is completely unusual to the normal 10 yo dudes, everyone was like "I collect stones"; "I play soccer"; "I like drawing" and my hobby was "Entomology" (The study of insects) everyone was weirded out by me because idk they had Arachnophobia or something? Other people simply found little crawling creatures weird.
Anyway the Biology Teacher started:
Teacher: "Blue Whale (she started of with the biggest mammal) - Nick you are next!"
Nick: "Elephant! - Paul you."
Paul: "Lion - Lisa you!"
Lisa: "Hmmmm mouse!"
Teacher: "Ohoho from Lion to mouse? Thats a pretty big jump Lisa, I dont think a lot of you know a smaller animal?"
Lisa (knowing I was handling little crawly creatues): "Jester you name one next!"
Me (as always sick of these stupid games simply wanted to end this shit, everyone thought I would say something like 'Lady Bug')
Me: "Ok...Nanoarchaeum equitans"
silence in the room
Then everyone was like "WHAAAAAT???? HAHAHAHAHA!!!"
Even the teacher was laughting, still have the bitch in front of my eyes to this day Mrs. B - a 54 yo Hippy Bitch who hasnt looked into a Biology book ever that wasnt provided by the rotting German school system.
Teacher: "Such an animal doesnt exist! You have just thought that name up right?" So she was like "You pulled that shit out of your ass"
Me: "Nanoarchaeum is a little aquatic parasite and is the smallest organism - and also the smallest animal on the planet, but if you want a smaller one like a virus - then I'd say the Hepatitis B virus which is with 40 nm the smallest thing on the planet - but usually Biologist dont count viruses as organisms, not even single cellular ones"
Teacher: " WHAT ARE YOU EVEN TALKING ABOUT"
Me: "What do you mean what am I talking about? I just named the smallest organism, thus the game ends."
Teacher: " That animal doesnt exist, name a different one"
Me: "What you mean doesnt exist? Its a microorganism discovered in 2002 (I read a book about microbiology just a week prior that was gifted to me by my grandparents)"
Me: "Name a real animal thats smaller then a mouse now!"
Me: (who is allergic to dust mites) "Dust Mite"
silence in the room, everyone staring confused at me
Teacher: "And whats that?"
Me: "What? You dont know what a dust mite is?! Its what lives on top of the mouse!"
Lisa: "You are such a weirdo!!!"
Class: "Hahahaha"
Me:
One week later I walked up to Mrs. B and showed her the page of the book my grandma gifted me - the Book title is '(2005) Brock Biology of Microorganisms. 11th Edition' I just discovered the book today in a package in my basement from the time I moved out from my parents, there were a lot of old school shit even from elementary. It made me cry, because I remembered the moment I became the weirdo of the class (my first Highschool) who always knew "Weird shit" and I was mercilessly bullied for it, especially by Mrs B. who became way more antagonizing towards me because I was constantly saying that she was wrong with things she stated in Biology class and that pissed her off so much, she tried everything to find false answers in my tests but I always had no less then a Grade B (Germany: 2) in any of my tests and I was the only one in my class who had to "double proof the answers" in order to get my grades corrected upwards because she got so pissed about my "Behaviour" she wanted me gone and ultimately I left in 8th grade.
But it wasnt just her, one brutal bully decided to collect the Dust from his Vaccum cleaner and bring it to school in order to dump it on my head, when my father saw me with all the dust over me he wanted to brutalize that kid, the kid didnt come to school for 2 weeks, but he ultimately realized my father would go to prison if he did something to him, he was backed up by the teachers too. He bullied me up until the end of 6th grade, when he changed school because he failed math and had to retake 6th grade on a different school.
Just writing this post made me cry, because I remembered a lot of such situations from my childhood + I listen to Linking Park music on Spotify while writing this
Thank you for reading, for those that did.
Anyway the Biology Teacher started:
Teacher: "Blue Whale (she started of with the biggest mammal) - Nick you are next!"
Nick: "Elephant! - Paul you."
Paul: "Lion - Lisa you!"
Lisa: "Hmmmm mouse!"
Teacher: "Ohoho from Lion to mouse? Thats a pretty big jump Lisa, I dont think a lot of you know a smaller animal?"
Lisa (knowing I was handling little crawly creatues): "Jester you name one next!"
Me (as always sick of these stupid games simply wanted to end this shit, everyone thought I would say something like 'Lady Bug')
Me: "Ok...Nanoarchaeum equitans"
silence in the room
Then everyone was like "WHAAAAAT???? HAHAHAHAHA!!!"
Even the teacher was laughting, still have the bitch in front of my eyes to this day Mrs. B - a 54 yo Hippy Bitch who hasnt looked into a Biology book ever that wasnt provided by the rotting German school system.
Teacher: "Such an animal doesnt exist! You have just thought that name up right?" So she was like "You pulled that shit out of your ass"
Me: "Nanoarchaeum is a little aquatic parasite and is the smallest organism - and also the smallest animal on the planet, but if you want a smaller one like a virus - then I'd say the Hepatitis B virus which is with 40 nm the smallest thing on the planet - but usually Biologist dont count viruses as organisms, not even single cellular ones"
Teacher: " WHAT ARE YOU EVEN TALKING ABOUT"
Me: "What do you mean what am I talking about? I just named the smallest organism, thus the game ends."
Teacher: " That animal doesnt exist, name a different one"
Me: "What you mean doesnt exist? Its a microorganism discovered in 2002 (I read a book about microbiology just a week prior that was gifted to me by my grandparents)"
Me: "Name a real animal thats smaller then a mouse now!"
Me: (who is allergic to dust mites) "Dust Mite"
silence in the room, everyone staring confused at me
Teacher: "And whats that?"
Me: "What? You dont know what a dust mite is?! Its what lives on top of the mouse!"
Lisa: "You are such a weirdo!!!"
Class: "Hahahaha"
Me:
One week later I walked up to Mrs. B and showed her the page of the book my grandma gifted me - the Book title is '(2005) Brock Biology of Microorganisms. 11th Edition' I just discovered the book today in a package in my basement from the time I moved out from my parents, there were a lot of old school shit even from elementary. It made me cry, because I remembered the moment I became the weirdo of the class (my first Highschool) who always knew "Weird shit" and I was mercilessly bullied for it, especially by Mrs B. who became way more antagonizing towards me because I was constantly saying that she was wrong with things she stated in Biology class and that pissed her off so much, she tried everything to find false answers in my tests but I always had no less then a Grade B (Germany: 2) in any of my tests and I was the only one in my class who had to "double proof the answers" in order to get my grades corrected upwards because she got so pissed about my "Behaviour" she wanted me gone and ultimately I left in 8th grade.
But it wasnt just her, one brutal bully decided to collect the Dust from his Vaccum cleaner and bring it to school in order to dump it on my head, when my father saw me with all the dust over me he wanted to brutalize that kid, the kid didnt come to school for 2 weeks, but he ultimately realized my father would go to prison if he did something to him, he was backed up by the teachers too. He bullied me up until the end of 6th grade, when he changed school because he failed math and had to retake 6th grade on a different school.
Just writing this post made me cry, because I remembered a lot of such situations from my childhood + I listen to Linking Park music on Spotify while writing this
Thank you for reading, for those that did.