Update:
I had a failed attempt. I tried downing a bunch of alcohol to get alcohol poisoning but no dice. I need something I can easily get my hands a hold of and get a otk. I’m so fucking sick of living. My family barely loves me, my supposed friends are always tearing me down about my physical appearance, the women just ogle at me in disgust. I just want it to end, I just want it to stop. I juts don’t want to wake up anymore. I’m just so sick and tired and I just want the way out. I don’t care if I get reincarnated as a fly, a fate like that is better than this. I never asked to be alive. I just want to die quickly and painlessly. I don’t give a fuck if they think I’m a coward because I can’t take this. I can’t fucking take it. It’s hell. My family is always busting my ass, my so called friends at busting my ass, women bust my ass on my appearance, fuck sake, I even tear myself down about myself. I just want it to go away. I’d pay someone to take me off the earth if that’s what it meant. I can’t find anyone with the balls to do it. They’re all too scared