Strange masturbation technique

[The End]

I had this friend that never talked about sex. He was prudish, you see. But one day, he let something slip: he masturbated by humping the floor.

(!!!)

What?! He tried to bury the subject; but I was incredulous, "Why do you masturbate this way? How long have you been doing this? Doesn't it hurt your dick?" He became very flustered, and the only edification I got from him is that he thought it was gay to touch a penis while thinking about sex. After this he refused to speak of this crazy masturbation technique any longer.

He'd mentioned this penis-aversion before. He used to wear a swim-suit in the shower - not kidding. But I had no idea his fear of cock went this far.

I just know he's going to get crazy Peyronie’s disease.

 

[inficel]

he thought it was gay to touch a penis while thinking about sex.

This guy is a meme

 

[acnescarcel]

lol

 

[Deleted member 126]

High quality post.

 

[Ritalincel]

he's going to get crazy Peyronie’s disease.

 

[CIA nigger]

i use mittens when i pee. cant let that shit touch cuz thats just uber gay

 

[San Salvador]

the most heterosexual man on the fucking planet

 

[blackcel]

He'd mentioned this penis-aversion before. He used to wear a swim-suit in the shower - not kidding. But I had no idea his fear of cock went this far.

Completely off topic, but this reminded me of a time during combat traininer where this one guy got everyone's attention int he shower and then starting helicoptering his dick around while loudly laughing like spongebob. One of the most hilarious things I experienced in my life.

 

[Deleted member 11015]

Completely off topic, but this reminded me of a time during combat traininer where this one guy got everyone's attention int he shower and then starting helicoptering his dick around while loudly laughing like spongebob. One of the most hilarious things I experienced in my life.

Only Americunts find shit like that funny. Very low IQ.

 

[PM_ME_STRIPPERS]

hes gonna fuck up his sex life. Masturbating in that sort of retarded way like that can have negative effects

 

[Gyros_Pretcel]

I used to hump my matress. It was godlike ngl. The problem was, it was just to good and my schlong became sore and normal masturbation didn't work anymore as well. So I stopped.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

the most heterosexual man on the fucking planet

So hetero he doesn´t even want to touch his own penis.

 

[YungCell]

This guy has God level IQ

 

[CountFapula]

he's the last stage of the expanding brain meme

 

[Pariah]

Someone underwent homo conversion therapy.

 

[Gone Coping]

Completely off topic, but this reminded me of a time during combat traininer where this one guy got everyone's attention int he shower and then starting helicoptering his dick around while loudly laughing like spongebob. One of the most hilarious things I experienced in my life.

 

[Jockcel]

his sex life

 

[Akira]

I’ve used a lot of things to masturbate, but never the floor. Seems like it would hurt.

 

[blackcel]

Only Americunts find shit like that funny. Very low IQ.

t. Buttmad dicklet who can't helicopter his dick

 

[Deleted member 11015]

t. Buttmad dicklet who can't helicopter his dick

You got me. Pass me the fucking rope.

 

[Sturmgeist]

Wonder if he got carpet burn

 

[Deleted member 6018]

This dude is god

 

[Anger]

And i thought i was autistic.

 

[Indari]

it's called prone masturbation and I used to do it sometimes using my hands as a cushion from something like age 5-13. can actually destroy your dick if you do it enough. mine seems perfectly alright as I cum buckets into fleshlight-sama every day. you sounded like an obnoxious brute there though