And it is one of the main reasons as to why I haven't even bothered to log onto IG & Facebook on my new phone. It's like I can't catch a break from all the black pills presented by IRL examples unless I forcefully withdraw from all communications and transform into a recluse, which I have been doing.
All these attractive girls in their peak that I wanted to get with who are ultimately too occupied with orbiting around friend groups with solid foundations too strong for me to be included in...every single one I fantasized about being with, and I do mean every. single. one. is getting dicked down on a consistent basis from someone who doesn't exude any of the characteristics of a stereotypical reject who passed through the torturous hierarchy of settling for less throughout his high school/college years. I used to think missing out on teen love was bad, but being starved in your early 20s is definitely worse. By that point, you only have limited time to try to ascend with a partner with a body which is in its biological peak, before the aesthetic slowly starts to go downhill in her late 20s.
It's like I can't even deny that looks & status matter at this point, because if not, what does? It isn't like I'm subscribing to a philosophy by random people online saying the same thing over & over again. I'm looking through a virtual capsule & realizing every living organism that passed through my life has access to intimate bonding, while I rot.
Sorry if these thoughts seem boilerpl8, I just couldn't help but come to this conclusion.
All these attractive girls in their peak that I wanted to get with who are ultimately too occupied with orbiting around friend groups with solid foundations too strong for me to be included in...every single one I fantasized about being with, and I do mean every. single. one. is getting dicked down on a consistent basis from someone who doesn't exude any of the characteristics of a stereotypical reject who passed through the torturous hierarchy of settling for less throughout his high school/college years. I used to think missing out on teen love was bad, but being starved in your early 20s is definitely worse. By that point, you only have limited time to try to ascend with a partner with a body which is in its biological peak, before the aesthetic slowly starts to go downhill in her late 20s.
It's like I can't even deny that looks & status matter at this point, because if not, what does? It isn't like I'm subscribing to a philosophy by random people online saying the same thing over & over again. I'm looking through a virtual capsule & realizing every living organism that passed through my life has access to intimate bonding, while I rot.
Sorry if these thoughts seem boilerpl8, I just couldn't help but come to this conclusion.
