My mom died 5 years ago. In my case first few weeks I was numb and my mind didnt really accept the fact she's gone.
After that I started feeling guilt, asking myself if I did something differently would she still be alive. Replaying her last moments in my head, wishing I talked more with her.
After 6, 7 months I tried to forget because guilt and remorse was killing me. I would have nightmares about how she blames me for her death or just dreams about her and I would wake up in tears.
After a year I started to forget her, like my mind blocked everything about her. I was still heavily depressed and I missed her very much because she was the only person that supported me with no questions asked. When the second year started I become my old self. It's sad that is like she never existed, I have trouble even remembering her face.