This is a long-winded autistic rant, don’t read it if you don’t want to.
It makes me want to rope how non-incels live. It makes me feel like I am grieving, the pain is so intense.
Bluepilled normies are happy. In their bones. In their soul. They do not care that they are living mediocre lives. They do not care about the blackpill. They do not care that the obvious truth of lookism is staring them in the face everywhere they go - they just make their peace with it.
Foids, in particular, are always fucking happy. Their problems are nothing, usually stupid vapid interpersonal dramas they don’t realise are a huge crock of shit. They bumble about the world in a bubble of joy that men like me will never get a tiny sliver of.
I have never been “friends” with foids, or really anyone - but the one foid I know well is in her late 30s now, very fat and ugly, and rode the cock carousel for years. She used to be a literal blue-haired feminist with tattoos and must have a body count over 20 I would guess. The man she married was her first love whom she reconnected with later in life, apparently her friends are the same as her. He said once at a birthday party that she was always the one he loved, since childhood. He loves her so much even though she’s an old whore.
This guy she married is nothing like me, of course, he’s good looking and smart and people smile when he talks to them, meanwhile when I am talking I can see people waiting for me to stop and being relieved when I go away.
And before you say it he is not some beta she just picked out of a lineup to support her with money and submission - he’s the love of her life it seems. They are utter suifuel to be around. He is better looking than her, and she knows it and worships the ground she walks on. She is constantly bringing him presents, fixes his plate at Christmas gatherings etc, and when he is not around she talks about him with a kindness I would give anything for someone to extend to me. Neither of them seem to care about their other’s sexual history, somehow. They even joke about it - apparently he used to date models before her, and her before him.
They’ve been in a loving marriage for years and she’s had two kids with him and they just seem like living in a constant state of semi-orgasmic bliss. If issues exist, they’re below the surface and they’re definitely not getting in the way of their happiness. Not that I can see at least.
These people just ignore the truth, they ignore the suffering of people like me, and fully live their own life. Going on trips, making food together, and no matter what happens at the end of the day they get into a big warm bed together and never have to sleep alone. I have wanted to yell and scream at them in the past, that she is a fat post-wall hag with a blown out roast beef cunt and he is a cuck for settling down with her, but neither of them would care, because they would go home that night and climb into bed together and fall asleep in love with their happy children in the next room.
They might even agree with me, but they just won’t care. Normies don’t care. There is no way to make them listen, to change things. There is no way to show the masses that the blackpill is real because they do not care if it is or not. I feel like I am the only one who can see that the emperor is wearing no clothes.
I would give anything to just once feel a fraction of what they feel every day. I would sacrifice all my knowledge of what’s behind the curtain for one single day feeling loved and happy. It might be cucked, in fact it probably is - but I see how miserable the rest of you are too, and the pain is never ending. It’s either ascension or rope, I can’t keep living like this, I am almost 35 and every single year grinds me into a finer and finer human paste.
I really don’t see how I am ever going to ascend, but something has to change. I have no idea how I can evER make it, otherwise.
It makes me want to rope how non-incels live. It makes me feel like I am grieving, the pain is so intense.
Bluepilled normies are happy. In their bones. In their soul. They do not care that they are living mediocre lives. They do not care about the blackpill. They do not care that the obvious truth of lookism is staring them in the face everywhere they go - they just make their peace with it.
Foids, in particular, are always fucking happy. Their problems are nothing, usually stupid vapid interpersonal dramas they don’t realise are a huge crock of shit. They bumble about the world in a bubble of joy that men like me will never get a tiny sliver of.
I have never been “friends” with foids, or really anyone - but the one foid I know well is in her late 30s now, very fat and ugly, and rode the cock carousel for years. She used to be a literal blue-haired feminist with tattoos and must have a body count over 20 I would guess. The man she married was her first love whom she reconnected with later in life, apparently her friends are the same as her. He said once at a birthday party that she was always the one he loved, since childhood. He loves her so much even though she’s an old whore.
This guy she married is nothing like me, of course, he’s good looking and smart and people smile when he talks to them, meanwhile when I am talking I can see people waiting for me to stop and being relieved when I go away.
And before you say it he is not some beta she just picked out of a lineup to support her with money and submission - he’s the love of her life it seems. They are utter suifuel to be around. He is better looking than her, and she knows it and worships the ground she walks on. She is constantly bringing him presents, fixes his plate at Christmas gatherings etc, and when he is not around she talks about him with a kindness I would give anything for someone to extend to me. Neither of them seem to care about their other’s sexual history, somehow. They even joke about it - apparently he used to date models before her, and her before him.
They’ve been in a loving marriage for years and she’s had two kids with him and they just seem like living in a constant state of semi-orgasmic bliss. If issues exist, they’re below the surface and they’re definitely not getting in the way of their happiness. Not that I can see at least.
These people just ignore the truth, they ignore the suffering of people like me, and fully live their own life. Going on trips, making food together, and no matter what happens at the end of the day they get into a big warm bed together and never have to sleep alone. I have wanted to yell and scream at them in the past, that she is a fat post-wall hag with a blown out roast beef cunt and he is a cuck for settling down with her, but neither of them would care, because they would go home that night and climb into bed together and fall asleep in love with their happy children in the next room.
They might even agree with me, but they just won’t care. Normies don’t care. There is no way to make them listen, to change things. There is no way to show the masses that the blackpill is real because they do not care if it is or not. I feel like I am the only one who can see that the emperor is wearing no clothes.
I would give anything to just once feel a fraction of what they feel every day. I would sacrifice all my knowledge of what’s behind the curtain for one single day feeling loved and happy. It might be cucked, in fact it probably is - but I see how miserable the rest of you are too, and the pain is never ending. It’s either ascension or rope, I can’t keep living like this, I am almost 35 and every single year grinds me into a finer and finer human paste.
I really don’t see how I am ever going to ascend, but something has to change. I have no idea how I can evER make it, otherwise.
stay strong. I know this sounds gay and cliche but, unironically, focus on yourself ( 
