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Venting My mom to me: "you never tell us anything about yourself"

Tenshi

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"Your dad was complaining you (almost) never talk to him, I told him you barely talk to me as well, I never know what you going through, you're always so secluded..."

Such a coincidence, as I was thinking about the same thing as I came back home from work. I really never say anything, I just get home, say good night, go to my room. Some basic convo about the day, which I always use my automatic replies. "How was your day?" "Nice, just a little bit tired".

Tired, tired of living, is what I wanted to say instead. But would this make any difference? Whether I say anything or do not, it won't change a thing. There's nothing they can do, and what they did in the past only caused more pain. So no, thank you. Me telling you about my life will only cause unnecessary distress.

There's already enough pain in all of us, so just forget about it and let me keep going as the soulless creature I have become, mom. That's what I wish I could tell her.

"I barely know my son, I don't even know what kind of music you like (as she points out to me carrying my earphones back to the room)..."

That's just what I am now, that's what a life of misery does to you. Over the years I got this shell around me, that's how I can live, that's how I can bear the unberable. Thick skin, isn't how they call it? There you go.

Who's in fault of that? I don't know... So many people, even they themselves and the chaotic upbringing they could give. Well, it's pointless to blame anyone by now, it doesn't matter. The damaged is done. It's not like kids come with instructions manuals or life only gets tough when we're ready...

I'm very sorry, this isn't the life I wanted, this is not how I wanted things to be. Not even in my worst nightmares I could ever fathom this could be my life at some point. But that's just how things are. I bet she didn't dream her life would be the way it went either.

So, how me telling you I'm sick of living and wish I didn't wake up tomorrow is going to make any good?

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oL85yzDJ4Q0
 
kekfuel

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Tenshi said:
I bet she didn't dream her life would be the way it went either.
tbh. inceldom doesnt just affect you but also ur family since its seppukufuel for them to see their kid miserable
 
HumbleandWise

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thats quite sad actually i feel sorry for you and your mother. I dont have any advice I mean reality is what it is. But quite sad bro you gave me feels with that headphone situation
 
AbsolutelyBrutal

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The same has happened to me recently, I did spill the beans and we got into a fight. You did good by not opening up, because the gaslight will turn to 100% and the relationship will get worse.

I also don't really talk much to my mom, never have.
 
Angry_runt

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if you care about your parents, just pretend you're happy when you're around them.
 
keksofthebest

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"There is nothing to talk about Mother, i am just this boring as a human being."
 
Tenshi

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Angry_runt said:
if you care about your parents, just pretend you're happy when you're around them.
as you can see, I have a hard time pretending I'm okay, let alone happy jfl
 
epillepsy

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Tenshi said:
"I barely know my son, I don't even know what kind of music you like (as she points out to me carrying my earphones back to the room)..."

your mom is using common female guilting tactics to get you to open up.
why do foids want men to open up?
so they can have ammo and embarrassing information they can use against you when the time is right.
my mom often brings up things i said in anger as evidence i'm a bad person and why she's right.
 
BrazilianLiveMatter

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Man I'm in the same situation as you, but in my case I purposely isolated myself, there were times when I was a child when I showed a little of my personality, likes and opinions my father always repressed me, my parents are very critical they say to help me not be spoiled or anything but it became something automatic for them even if i do exactly what i was asked they always ALWAYS say something negative or what i could have done it made me very defensive with mine Personal likes, I never told them what songs I like or what I really enjoy, fuck them, you can't expect a kid who gets criticized every time he shows a part of him to become an open human being, if I can. leave the house i'll cut my relationships tbh
 
HumbleandWise

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i cant rope because i could not do that to my parents, i do care about them and they dont deserve it.
if i didn't though would have been over a long time ago
 
RREEEEEEEEE

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Tenshi

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HumbleandWise said:
i cant rope because i could not do that to my parents, i do care about them and they dont deserve it.
if i didn't though would have been over a long time ago
Yeah bro, I feel the same way.

I'm doing the best I can to endure the pain while they live, but I really can't just go acting as I'm happy and I'm normal, functional human being
BrazilianLiveMatter said:
Man I'm in the same situation as you, but in my case I purposely isolated myself, there were times when I was a child when I showed a little of my personality, likes and opinions my father always repressed me, my parents are very critical they say to help me not be spoiled or anything but it became something automatic for them even if i do exactly what i was asked they always ALWAYS say something negative or what i could have done it made me very defensive with mine Personal likes, I never told them what songs I like or what I really enjoy, fuck them, you can't expect a kid who gets criticized every time he shows a part of him to become an open human being, if I can. leave the house i'll cut my relationships tbh
Dude, you just described precisely how things were here as well, repressive, that's the word.

I don't recall much of my childhood and early teen years, my memory is kinda of blurry, but I can remember how negative and repressive they were with me, even minor things like tastes, opinions, and everything as you said. Especially my dad, who also has BDP.

Then you grow up and they expect things to be normal... Well, as I said it's pointless to call them out or dub culprits, the damage is done...
 
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0Energy0Happyness

0Energy0Happyness

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Can relate
BrazilianLiveMatter said:
Man I'm in the same situation as you, but in my case I purposely isolated myself, there were times when I was a child when I showed a little of my personality, likes and opinions my father always repressed me, my parents are very critical they say to help me not be spoiled or anything but it became something automatic for them even if i do exactly what i was asked they always ALWAYS say something negative or what i could have done it made me very defensive with mine Personal likes, I never told them what songs I like or what I really enjoy, fuck them, you can't expect a kid who gets criticized every time he shows a part of him to become an open human being, if I can. leave the house i'll cut my relationships tbh
Same to me
 
M

MuddyBuddy

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I get the same lecture too and give the same automatic responses which they know are fake. I'm just thinking there's no point in saying how things truely are because it will only cause more heartache and change nothing anyway. Just let me rot.
 
BRMonkecell

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You nailed the fells man. As I have two cold distant parents, it's almost as if they are afraid to even ask anything out of me.

It's you and you alone, don't really expect a helping hand or something.
 
OscarAllius

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Angry_runt said:
if you care about your parents, just pretend you're happy when you're around them.
I do exactly that, not used to talk about my life to them
 
Transcended Trucel

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AbsolutelyBrutal said:
The same has happened to me recently, I did spill the beans and we got into a fight. You did good by not opening up, because the gaslight will turn to 100% and the relationship will get worse.

I also don't really talk much to my mom, never have.
High IQ never open up! Opening up can lead to conflict or them targeting your vulnerabilities during an argument.
epillepsy said:
your mom is using common female guilting tactics to get you to open up.
why do foids want men to open up?
so they can have ammo and embarrassing information they can use against you when the time is right.
my mom often brings up things i said in anger as evidence i'm a bad person and why she's right.
High IQ. In my case though, my mother is too retarded to remember anything. But when she does, she literally tells everyone she knows. She is gossip addicted. I remember long time back, I told her that my aunt's food was kinda shit, and this retard literally told that aunt that I called her food shit JFL.
 
AlexanderTheGreat11

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I tell my mother how i truly feel , she downplays it , she just can't relate
 
kampman

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MuddyBuddy said:
I get the same lecture too and give the same automatic responses which they know are fake. I'm just thinking there's no point in saying how things truely are because it will only cause more heartache and change nothing anyway. Just let me rot.

Relatable
 
Arthas93

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I am very talkative and open with my family, job/coworkers and neighborhood.
I still remember when they all used to think that I was gay or something.

They never lost any opportunity they had to insinuate that I was gay.
When we interacted and talked, they were always on anticipation of some "slip up" on my part or some "gotcha moment".

But the days went by, weeks became months, months became years.
I don't drink, I don't smoke, I don't do drugs or have erratic behavior.
No parties, no friends, no weekend escapes or anything like that.

Now they are super disappointed.
And sort of just accept/understand that I am a woman-hater misogynist unapologetic Incel.

Sometimes I blurt something and they are like: "If you keep talking about women like that they won't give you a chance."
And I just vomit back at them: "Then why none of those filthy whores ever gave me any chance when I was the complete opposite of what I am today and was not "talking about women like that"?"
And they just go: " :dafuckfeels: "
 
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Cope_Time

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mines mostly do their thing
 
Mecoja

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Sad thing this life. I got fucked beyond repair by my parents and i never talked to them about that because they would go into defensive self pity state. But yeah whats done is done, my mom is dead, dad will be too sooner or later, my youth wasted in stress, fear and arguing.
 
Vrthraghna

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epillepsy said:
your mom is using common female guilting tactics to get you to open up.
why do foids want men to open up?
so they can have ammo and embarrassing information they can use against you when the time is right.
my mom often brings up things i said in anger as evidence i'm a bad person and why she's right.
Based comment.
Our moms are all foidlets and deserve to be treated like one.
 
Ellsworth

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At least your parents care enough to ask. Mine clearly see that I have nothing in my life and never question me about anything or ask if I’m happy. They only care about me being available to serve them.
 
B

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AbsolutelyBrutal said:
You did good by not opening up, because the gaslight will turn to 100% and the relationship will get worse.
 
L

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Fuck, this hit me hard. My mom always complains that I don't talk enough. Funny thing is that at school, right up till I was 13, I was really talkative. My teachers used to complain at every parent-teacher meeting that I just wouldn't shut up and I talked too much. I loved making jokes and laughing at things. And now, at 24, well... I couldn't tell a joke to save my life. I hardly talk at all. My mind goes blank, whereas before I was so quick witted with my replies. I was actually extremely NT lol. What fucked me up at home was my dad constantly insulting and hitting me when I did something wrong, he worked a tough job during the night and he used to take out his frustration on me. Even a simple mistake like not wearing my retainers for a night would set him off. It's like in my life I wasn't allowed to make any sort of mistake. Then there was him and my sister constantly calling me ugly all the time. I don't need to tell you how much that hurt because I already had no self esteem (no girlfriend, no friends, lonely). Probably my biggest issue in life is that I'm too sensitive, especially with what my family says about me, I take every insult to heart even though I shouldn't, I can't help it. But then again, they weren't the only ones calling me ugly.
 
SoloAlex

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„Mom, I am an ugly man. I will die alone and there is NOTHING I can do about it. Expect me to go insane soon.“
 
InMyCellInHell

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Tenshi said:
"Your dad was complaining you (almost) never talk to him, I told him you barely talk to me as well, I never know what you going through, you're always so secluded..."

Such a coincidence, as I was thinking about the same thing as I came back home from work. I really never say anything, I just get home, say good night, go to my room. Some basic convo about the day, which I always use my automatic replies. "How was your day?" "Nice, just a little bit tired".

Tired, tired of living, is what I wanted to say instead. But would this make any difference? Whether I say anything or do not, it won't change a thing. There's nothing they can do, and what they did in the past only caused more pain. So no, thank you. Me telling you about my life will only cause unnecessary distress.

There's already enough pain in all of us, so just forget about it and let me keep going as the soulless creature I have become, mom. That's what I wish I could tell her.

"I barely know my son, I don't even know what kind of music you like (as she points out to me carrying my earphones back to the room)..."

That's just what I am now, that's what a life of misery does to you. Over the years I got this shell around me, that's how I can live, that's how I can bear the unberable. Thick skin, isn't how they call it? There you go.

Who's in fault of that? I don't know... So many people, even they themselves and the chaotic upbringing they could give. Well, it's pointless to blame anyone by now, it doesn't matter. The damaged is done. It's not like kids come with instructions manuals or life only gets tough when we're ready...

I'm very sorry, this isn't the life I wanted, this is not how I wanted things to be. Not even in my worst nightmares I could ever fathom this could be my life at some point. But that's just how things are. I bet she didn't dream her life would be the way it went either.

So, how me telling you I'm sick of living and wish I didn't wake up tomorrow is going to make any good?

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oL85yzDJ4Q0
Why even tell them anything? They'll just give you stupid blue-pilled boomer advice that's outdated by at least 50 years.
 
cvury

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The worst part of my week is when I have to call my parents. All they do is tell me how much of a disappointment I am and I have to sit there and listen. They are right but it just hurts to hear. The only reason I pick up is because they send me some money every month to help get by.
 
Arabcel9

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same feeling tbh , for years and up till this day ll my father ever talked to me about was stooodying and oh anon you neeed to stoooody , stoody this ,stoody that and now he wonders why i have no intrest in talking to him since i know that any conversation would end with just focus on your studies and nothing else , everything comes later :society:.

im so secluded and solitudemaxxed idc about anything rn only praying to allah
 
SlutLiberationFront

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Tenshi said:
"Your dad was complaining you (almost) never talk to him, I told him you barely talk to me as well, I never know what you going through, you're always so secluded..."

Such a coincidence, as I was thinking about the same thing as I came back home from work. I really never say anything, I just get home, say good night, go to my room. Some basic convo about the day, which I always use my automatic replies. "How was your day?" "Nice, just a little bit tired".

Tired, tired of living, is what I wanted to say instead. But would this make any difference? Whether I say anything or do not, it won't change a thing. There's nothing they can do, and what they did in the past only caused more pain. So no, thank you. Me telling you about my life will only cause unnecessary distress.

There's already enough pain in all of us, so just forget about it and let me keep going as the soulless creature I have become, mom. That's what I wish I could tell her.

"I barely know my son, I don't even know what kind of music you like (as she points out to me carrying my earphones back to the room)..."

That's just what I am now, that's what a life of misery does to you. Over the years I got this shell around me, that's how I can live, that's how I can bear the unberable. Thick skin, isn't how they call it? There you go.

Who's in fault of that? I don't know... So many people, even they themselves and the chaotic upbringing they could give. Well, it's pointless to blame anyone by now, it doesn't matter. The damaged is done. It's not like kids come with instructions manuals or life only gets tough when we're ready...

I'm very sorry, this isn't the life I wanted, this is not how I wanted things to be. Not even in my worst nightmares I could ever fathom this could be my life at some point. But that's just how things are. I bet she didn't dream her life would be the way it went either.

So, how me telling you I'm sick of living and wish I didn't wake up tomorrow is going to make any good?

View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oL85yzDJ4Q0
I openly tell my mom the last past. I always say "I want to sleep and never wake up anymore". Or when she asks me if I want something I say "dying".
She kinda knows I am going through hell, she saw the suffering I went through and still go, it's a bit comforting to have an understanding person being your closest alive relative, but all she does is trying to bluepill me as she always did, and I'm tired of it.
 
Tenshi

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SlutLiberationFront said:
I openly tell my mom the last past. I always say "I want to sleep and never wake up anymore". Or when she asks me if I want something I say "dying".
She kinda knows I am going through hell, she saw the suffering I went through and still go, it's a bit comforting to have an understanding person being your closest alive relative, but all she does is trying to bluepill me as she always did, and I'm tired of it.
I think we have an opposite take on this, you see I'd be even more stressed out having my mom worrying about these things I'm going through, and I don't her to suffer even more, because it will be bad for everyone, she's gonna be depressed, I'm continue depressed and get even more knowing she's depressed.

The bluepill part is inevitable I guess, she's your mom afterall. TBH I wouldn't want any of my parents carrying the burden I have to carry as a blackpilled person, the pain of despair and hopelessness is just unbearable sometimes, let they believe everything is okay and we see how far we can go with this
 
IncelCatechumen

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I´m sorry to hear that Tenshi, you should talk more to her.
 
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Speed

Speed

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Wonder what she'll think when she comes home to see you hanging one day.:feelsrope:
 
D

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Speed said:
Wonder what she'll think when she comes home to see you hanging one day.:feelsrope:
 
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