Earlier this week my coworkers really got on my ass because of my work ethic. Not in the sense of me. Just doing my job at work but my life goes. I'm 26 now and I've been working at my hospital for a little over 2 years. Everyone keeps asking me what I'm going to do later on and I keep telling them I don't know. I already have a degree in English and I tried becoming a teacher but the kids for pieces of shit. I thought about becoming a social worker but there's a bunch of oops. I got to jump through for that too. It was legit bothering me but they were saying Dad, I need to figure out something quick cuz I shouldn't be working here for the rest of my life. Well, I think it was a real cunt way of expressing that sentiment. They are in fact right. My job isn't hard but dealing with crackheads and horrors from the worst part of the Bronx isn't something I want to do for the next three decades. However, I didn't have the heart to tell them that I'm using almost all of my willpower to not fucking an-hero myself out of pure loneliness and lack of pussy. There are days where I legit don't want to go to fucking work only because I have to deal with women. I can't fuck. I know that's the most pettiest shit to say, but I am legitimately mentally dying of loneliness. I don't know how long I can last. I know I should be trying to level up my career but at what point does it really matter if I can't find a woman to marry and breed with. And if I do how do I make sure I don't get divorce raped or cucked? I'm trying all that I can right now by gym maxing and I am getting definite strength gains but it's still not enough. I'm thinking about practicing boxing at home cuz fuck paying for 500 bucks a month to go to some bullshit mcdojo where they're going to teach you the most stripped down bullshit. I know this sounds corny as fuck but honestly what I need right now is GF or at least some fuck money cuz then I wouldn't have this insane void in my soul. I honestly would probably be able to move out my parents house because of it.
