Many moons ago, when I first joined this forum, I sent a message to @FACEandLMS , asking him how to find meaning and purpose in your life once you've forgone dealing with women as a whole, as I have.
He never answered, and many months later, I'm glad that he didn't.
Face did me a favor. When I first discovered him in 2018, I finally learned why I never had any success with women.
In all fairness, I'm prepared to admit that I've displayed and wrestled with many personality issues, ones that have brought many sour consequences in my life. It has been a fight, largely a mental and emotional one, but the so called "black pill" among other things have brought great healing.
However, I would never imagined that my appearance would have even factored in my lack of success, especially the racial factor. For years, I struggled to he point of suicidal depression with racial self hatred, something I've only began to recover from recently.
I had already forsaken pursuing women, mainly due to a lack of interest. I had gotten nowhere since I first hit puberty, and the things I learned from the MGTOW community had turned me off to women altogether.
The only reason I chose to join this community was because only their theories explained my lack of success, and if I suddenly developed a newfound interest of the wild goose chase of finding a partner, it would have only ended in failure. For a while, it felt comforting to know that there were others like me, who understood that, at the end of the day, nature governs us all, and we are powerless to defy it's system, or our place in it.
However, as I became consumed with this philosophy the more obvious it became that, as Mikasa Ackerman observed in "Attack on Titan", Life is cruel.
Life is suffering, and I was foolish to have ever thought otherwise. In fact, that's the first noble truth of Buddhism. The second states that suffering is caused by desire. While that isn't untrue, there is more to that picture.
If life is suffering, then the absence of life is therefore the cessation of suffering.
Nick Mkray is dead, killed by his own hands, and by Friday, @Mickeyonacid will be too. Who knows how many countless others have done the same, and will continue to do so. As I thought of a way to give Mickey a decent sendoff, the question that Viktor Frankl posed in this book "Man's Search for Meaning" popped up in my head:
Why haven't you committed suicide?
What I'm trying to say is, life itself causing suffering, and like so many in this world, I've been trying on vain to find the ultimate cope, hoping to deal with the fact that life is hopeless. Meaningless. No purpose to existence.
For the record, this isn't about women. I've gotten over them, but the realization of a cold, inhospitable universe, with no delusion of man being slated for triumph, has finally led me to make a final decision.
Life is suffering, and by having children, we invariably inflict suffering on innocent babies and ducklings just tojconvice ourselves that we've achieved some biological goal that - in the grand scheme of things- means nothing.
I wish I had never been born, and thus, there's only one solution. All roads lead to death, so if that's the final destination, why act as though there is anything more? No distraction I've tried to emerge in has wiped this from my mind, being the pragmatist that I am.
I am thankful for Face. Without him, I would have died without answers. What answer could he have given me? Life has no purpose, and to end it is to end suffering permanently.
I will miss some people here though.
Thanks for reading.
He never answered, and many months later, I'm glad that he didn't.
Face did me a favor. When I first discovered him in 2018, I finally learned why I never had any success with women.
In all fairness, I'm prepared to admit that I've displayed and wrestled with many personality issues, ones that have brought many sour consequences in my life. It has been a fight, largely a mental and emotional one, but the so called "black pill" among other things have brought great healing.
However, I would never imagined that my appearance would have even factored in my lack of success, especially the racial factor. For years, I struggled to he point of suicidal depression with racial self hatred, something I've only began to recover from recently.
I had already forsaken pursuing women, mainly due to a lack of interest. I had gotten nowhere since I first hit puberty, and the things I learned from the MGTOW community had turned me off to women altogether.
The only reason I chose to join this community was because only their theories explained my lack of success, and if I suddenly developed a newfound interest of the wild goose chase of finding a partner, it would have only ended in failure. For a while, it felt comforting to know that there were others like me, who understood that, at the end of the day, nature governs us all, and we are powerless to defy it's system, or our place in it.
However, as I became consumed with this philosophy the more obvious it became that, as Mikasa Ackerman observed in "Attack on Titan", Life is cruel.
Life is suffering, and I was foolish to have ever thought otherwise. In fact, that's the first noble truth of Buddhism. The second states that suffering is caused by desire. While that isn't untrue, there is more to that picture.
If life is suffering, then the absence of life is therefore the cessation of suffering.
Nick Mkray is dead, killed by his own hands, and by Friday, @Mickeyonacid will be too. Who knows how many countless others have done the same, and will continue to do so. As I thought of a way to give Mickey a decent sendoff, the question that Viktor Frankl posed in this book "Man's Search for Meaning" popped up in my head:
Why haven't you committed suicide?
What I'm trying to say is, life itself causing suffering, and like so many in this world, I've been trying on vain to find the ultimate cope, hoping to deal with the fact that life is hopeless. Meaningless. No purpose to existence.
For the record, this isn't about women. I've gotten over them, but the realization of a cold, inhospitable universe, with no delusion of man being slated for triumph, has finally led me to make a final decision.
Life is suffering, and by having children, we invariably inflict suffering on innocent babies and ducklings just tojconvice ourselves that we've achieved some biological goal that - in the grand scheme of things- means nothing.
I wish I had never been born, and thus, there's only one solution. All roads lead to death, so if that's the final destination, why act as though there is anything more? No distraction I've tried to emerge in has wiped this from my mind, being the pragmatist that I am.
I am thankful for Face. Without him, I would have died without answers. What answer could he have given me? Life has no purpose, and to end it is to end suffering permanently.
I will miss some people here though.
Thanks for reading.
