As early as age 13 I realized I was an ugly fuck. I thought there was nothing I could do about it. I never believed that going to the gym or learning "game" would help me. I knew that my face was a disaster. I DID eventually looksmax and become attractive enough to gain girls but I never, ever believed that I would succeed if my face was ugly. My face was COMPLETELY hideous and I attempted suicide several times at age 13. I was blackpilled about my looks.
A backstory on my looks from the most formative teen years: I had ATOCIOUS acne and literal acne SCABS all over my face. Didn't know how shave so my face was really scraggly. My face was really dry and you could see the dry skin. My hair was too dry and long. My arms and leg were extremely hairy and just looked weird compared to everyone else at the time. I had braces plus a metal extremity in the roof of my mouth that made me talk with a lisp. I always wore baggy gym clothes. I also had 10/10 inhib and I'm not lying when I say that. I was scared to so much as BLOW MY NOSE for fear of attention. I would honestly rate myself at the time as a .5/10 or even lower.
I guess there was a little bit of bluepill in me when I thought that MAYBE I could still experience real love with a nonvirgin, but even as early as 16 I realized how it would be ruined. I was hanging on for hope out of desperation. So there was a little bluepill but ultimately I would say I was far more blackpilled realizing young how perverse it was.
A backstory on my looks from the most formative teen years: I had ATOCIOUS acne and literal acne SCABS all over my face. Didn't know how shave so my face was really scraggly. My face was really dry and you could see the dry skin. My hair was too dry and long. My arms and leg were extremely hairy and just looked weird compared to everyone else at the time. I had braces plus a metal extremity in the roof of my mouth that made me talk with a lisp. I always wore baggy gym clothes. I also had 10/10 inhib and I'm not lying when I say that. I was scared to so much as BLOW MY NOSE for fear of attention. I would honestly rate myself at the time as a .5/10 or even lower.
I guess there was a little bit of bluepill in me when I thought that MAYBE I could still experience real love with a nonvirgin, but even as early as 16 I realized how it would be ruined. I was hanging on for hope out of desperation. So there was a little bluepill but ultimately I would say I was far more blackpilled realizing young how perverse it was.
