Intro to Incels

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Nov 7, 2017
Introduction to Incels and the Blackpill.

What does Incel mean?
Incel means Involuntary Celibate, a person who wants to be in a loving relationship but is unable to find a partner, even after trying dating applications or approaching in real life. Note that sex is not the main point of being incel.

Am I an incel?
If you fit the above definition, you are!

Is being an incel the same as being a virgin?
No. While the vast majority of incels are virgins, there are some cases where a person has had sex in the past but due to a number of circumstances is now unable to enter a relationship.

Why don't you go to an escort?
While some people do go to escorts, sex isn't the main point of inceldom, as already stated.

Is there a minimum required age to be incel?
In general one should wait until late teens to claim being incel, as otherwise puberty may still change the person's appearence and personality, giving room to enter a relationship still.

Would therapy help?
While therapy is a valid source of help for many people, it is not a catch-all solution for every problem. Therapy may help you accept your situation, but it won't fix the lack of emotional warmth. Most of all it is an overused platitude that assumes people are ignorant of its existence.

Can females be incel? Can gay people?
It’s vastly easier for a female to get validation and sex than a male in today's society. Unless a female belongs to the bottom percentile in terms of appearance it’s going to be very hard for them not to be able to find many suitors for any kind of romantic or sexual activity.
While not discussed as often, homosexual men similarly seem to have it easier than heterosexual men.
Having said that, each person knows if they fit the definition of incel written above or not.

What are the Bluepill, Redpill, and Blackpill?
They are catchy names given to three ideologies. The names are based off the movie "The Matrix", where Morpheus offers Neo one of two pills, a red and blue one. The blackpill was later derived from these two.
  • The Bluepill can be seen as idealistic, and claims personality and simply being yourself is what matter the most in the game of seduction.
  • The Redpill tries to show that appearance and attitude are far more important when approaching girls than inherent personality. Maximize your odds by dressing this way, talking that way, gesturing this other way instead.
  • The Blackpill claims being attractive is far more important than personality or attitude; while the latter can be improved, they are marginal in comparison to natural appearance.
There are many scientific threads on this forum showing that the Blackpill in particular is true, thus most incels believe in it. In fact, we have a thread just to catalogue the most accurate evidence of the Blackpill: You can check it out here.

Please note that you can be incel and not believe in any of these ideologies, or vice-versa. The majority simply end up believing in them due to the fact they explain their situation accurately.

Where can I learn more about the different pills?
Try this thread.

I've seen unattractive people with partners, doesn't that mean being incel is a choice?
No one claims unattractive people can't find partners; but no one would disagree the more unattractive the person, the less their chances of finding love, even more so if you consider incels tend to suffer from social isolation, depression, anxiety, and other impairments, which overall pushes their chances of relationships to the ground. Moreover, every rejection a person suffers is a hit to their self-esteem and willpower, making each next attempt feel more futile and painful.
Overall, no one says there can't be cases where unattractive people have partners, but these cases are the exception and not the rule.

What would improve an incel's situation?
Some consider surgery as a way to improve their appearance, but the sad truth is that for many the chances of entering a loving relationship are very scarce.

Who’s Chad?
Chad is what incels are not: Charismatic, tall, good-looking, confident, muscular. It's a meme.

I've heard negative things about Incels, is there truth to it?
The media is usually sensationalistc and likes to plays with the reader's emotions. An incel is a person who wants a loving relationship but is unable to enter one, anything else is speculation from part of outsiders to the community. Remember that while society is quick to say not all Muslims are terrorists or not all Germans are nazis, we've somehow been an exception and been labeled as evil or dangerous. Even Wikipedia has been protected from edits by anyone who is not an active editor on the site since early 2018 (read more here), no actual incels have made a single contribution to it. Thus, we are at the mercy of whoever writes the latest article that goes viral.

I have more questions that aren't answered here!
We are always open to sincere curiosity. Feel free to use the contact form at the bottom of the page.
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