fantasycel
Things are always better in my head
★★
- Joined
- May 4, 2024
- Posts
- 1,686
It's just one of those nights after a wasted day of rotting where the incel rage kicks in. The rage that has an even more intense backdrop of sadness. I think of all the moments I have missed out on. I think of how other's have spent their Saturday, probably with women or friends. I think of how I have never felt the touch of a woman in my life. I think of how I am essentially invisible to them because of the way I look. It's one of those nights where I feel jittery from anger and sadness. Where I feel like I could rope at this very moment. All I have ever wanted in life was to have friends and a girlfriend. All I want is something that most people wherever they are do not have to work on at all. I want something that is a basic human right. I was denied love and companionship because I was born ugly. What is existence without people to share it with. I wonder if the sadness will ever go away. The trauma from all the summers I spent alone as a kid will always be with me. The feeling of stalking people on social media to see what they are up to and getting a glimpse of a life infinitely better than mine will never go away. I can cope and try to forget all I want, but the feeling will always come back. I hope that this is not the feeling that comes upon death. I want to die thinking of the happy life I lived, not the days spent rotting on incel forums and coping with the fantasies of a child.
I feel like a child with responsibilities. I have no experiences that mark me as an adult except for the passage of time.
I feel like a child with responsibilities. I have no experiences that mark me as an adult except for the passage of time.