Can't take the depression and pain anymore, seriously feeling suicidal even though I don't have the means. On top of that, I have no motivation, my sleep is wrecked and I can't handle this shit life anymore. Even though this is going to suck ass at least I hope I can become more motivated so I can wageslave, get an education, find enjoyment in copes and maybe make some friends IRL, maybe even ascend by surgerycelling or arranged marriage. My mental health has been horrible recently and I feel so helpless and hopeless, I have been looking to get appointments for outpatient care but they are all full or take months to get appointment, I need something to calm the pain right now. That's why I will do this, sorry for the long rant, my sleep deprivation has made me incoherent even. Anyway I won't be here for a week or two see you guys later.
